Monday, June 14, 2010

Darlings, We Have SO MUCH To Talk About!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, let me tell you I am completely exhasuted from my weekend! I need a day off from my days off!!!!!!!!! It started on Friday, with a bite to eat and a viewing of "Hairspray." Let's face it, lambs, I know you dance the Mashed Potato fine, but that don't tell me you are really mine!!!!! Saturday was a disaster day, what with an accident befalling one of our community members, but he survived, thank God, but the day was work, work, work! But then we reitred after eve for an adventuer in Queens, ending up back in the Village at a sumptuous pensione, and a viweing of the film classic "Love Is A Many Splendored Thing." Oh, my God, darling.........JENNIFER JONES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She was simply stunning in this, one of her best films, and the costumes designer had a field day creating brilliant Eurasian patterns for her. I am telling you, even Anna Wintour would have been impressed. I know I was, girls, and you know how close to Anna I am!!!!!!!! And no one suffers so nobly for love as Jennifer Jones in this movie. And when it came to that final scene on the hill...oh my GOD, I cried real tears. But fortunately I had a many splendored thing next to me, to dry and kiss them away. Let me tell you it is a testament to love, because even though several times I had to prod him awake--I mean, how could anyone fall asleep during JENNIFER JONES!!!!!--he is still special to me. These men, girls. They just don't get our romance movies. But there is that inner specialness PLUS an understanding that, when the time comes, UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE does one fall asleep at "The Song of Bernadette!!!!!" I meam, talk about a sin!!!! But how could one slumber through such a masterpiece as that??????

Well, after all this romantic ardor on Saturday, you had better believe, girls, that Sunday was, indeed, a day of rest. While the rain kept us from the water, it did not keep one from venturing out from the pensione for a little bit. Only to retreat back to a sumptuous meal and then the TONY awards.

Let's start with the meal. I am telling you, girls, it was worthy of One If By Land, Two If By Sea. A scrumptious rib roast, medium rare,with the most fabulous salad that also included pickeled tomatoes and veggies, with a side dish of baby potates, onions and spices, capped off later by fruit and chocolate gelatto. And now let us talk about those TONY awards.

First, you better believe that Miss Chenowith was fit to be tied when Miss Finneran copped the TONY. I don't believe for a minute that Kristen lent her her eyelashes; the only thing she would lend Katie would be some rat poison!!!!!!! Bitch, bitch, girls!!!!!! Seems like everyone was a movie star winning TONY awards, and everyone was winning TONYS for roles won TONYs previously by their originator. Like Katie Finneran, whose predecessor, Marianne Meercer, won the TONY for the same role in the same show, back in 1968. Ditto Denzel and James Earl Jones, and the inexcusable Catherine Zeta Jones in "A Little Night Music." Now, darlings, I saw Glynis Johns in the orginal, and NO ONE touches "Send In The Clowns" like she. The alleged performance we saw from Jones last night was like a bad BAD musical theater audition from a wannabe drama student. I mean, even the kids on "Glee" are more competent than this. Hell, they are more competent than some of their guest stars, who inculde Miss Chenowith, and that Stresand wannabe last night trying to get breath control through "Don't Rain On My Parade." Thank God for Sean Hayes prancing his cute little body all over the place, and exhibiting his impressive basket and buns in that Spriderman costume. His rendition was better than that "Glee" bitch! But nothing touched Catherine Zeta Jones for atrocity. And, then, they go ahead and give her the TONY award????????? For that????????? What did she do, fuck the old geezers on the committee as they popped Viagara?????? Have her husband, Michael Douglas, buy her the award. That is probably what happened, just like it did back in 1967 when Estelle Parsons won the Supporting Actress Oscar. Don't even get me started on the Oscars, darling!!!!!! At least the TONY program MOVED and had dynamism and momentum, even if I was blinded by the glare of "American Idiot," and less than impressed by "Million Dollar Quartet," and, sad to say "Promises, Promises!" But I still want to see it.

So here I am on the morning after, just plum exhausted, but writing to all my girls out there. Tongiht it is dinner at the World Famous Malibu, then home to my couch and rest!!!! Put my hair in curlers, get out of this girdle, and remove the nail polish.

I only hope they ask ME to host the TONYS next year!!!!!!!! Sweetie, where is MY Tony award????????????

Love to all those trophy wives out there. And that trophy WHORE Catherine Zeta Jones.

I am such a BITCH, darlings. But I love you, and you love me!

Toodles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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