Girls, what has it come to??? I reference other writers all the time; now I am referencing myself???? To refresh your memories, as you refresh your cups with coffee, back on January 12, I told of my scurrilous nemesis named Frantique Fromage. This is the screen name of someone on IMDB, who constantly berates the sacredness of Jennifer Jones, and the masterpiece that "The Song Of Bernadette" is. All my girls know that!!!!
Monsieur is amused by the rapier verbal sparring between Frantique (whose trashy Hell residence I exposed on January 12; see back then for picture!!!) so much so he is dying to meet this creature!!!! And I have to confess to a curiosity myself. Frantique has dropped enough references to reveal his identity as a fellow New Yorker, but when he mentioned seeing me on Bethune Street, not far from where Monsieur resides, I started putting two and two together. The person in question had to be someone with enough wit and movie knowledge, who lived in the nabe. Which left one possibility open to me--none other than Charles Busch!!! Frankly, if HE had turned out to have been Frantique, I would have been thrilled. But a gracious reply to an email inquiry I sent (and thank you so much, Charles) told me my hunch was wrong!!! Besides, in or out of drag, Mr. Busch cuts a striking figure, and Frantique, as I judge, is about as striking in appearance as Philip Seymour Hoffman. Only without talent, which automatically, too, eliminates Mr. Busch.
Now, take a look at the guy in the picture. THIS is what I came up with, when I
Googled "Frantique Fromage!!!" Look at that pig nose!!!! Does he live with Mama???
No, she is probably dead and buried in the back yard!!!!!! Let me tell you, darlings, while the pic may not exactly be MY Frantique, his ugliness qualifies!!!!!
There is more to this tantalizing mystery!!!! Yesterday, while walking past Abingdon Square, I passed this REAL ugly guy!! Bald, and badly dressed--first of all, in Summer garb, and it was a nasty, rainy, Fall day!!! He had on a light hooded windbreaker, a childlike white T-shirt, with something embossed on it in yellow, a pair of khaki shorts, a set of spindly legs, ankle socks, and sneakers!!!! Honey, he was much too old to pull off this act!!!! And you should have seen his legs--like spindly sticks!!! We are NOT talking Donna McKechnie here!!!! And--you are not going to believe this, lambs, but it was true--he was walking a white poodle!!!! He could have stepped out of a John Waters movie!!!!!!
Girls, I am convinced this was Frantique!!!! The only thing missing was a sharp look or dash of wit, which it was not possible for me to examine, short of talking to this creature!!!! But such a creature is the sort I have maintained Frantique is, and, with the added feature of seeing him in the nabe, this just about clinches it. So, until I am proven wrong, I am keeping my eyes out for this character in the future, to see if he COULD be Frantique!!!!!
Two more things. Mr. Busch warned that if the mystery were solved, the fun basically would be lost, and I agree!!!! Which means I may have to discover Frantique by accident!!!! Or do so, without making him aware that I have!!!!
Monsieur insists it is someone who knows ME, most likely via this blog!!!! I cannot argue with this, but my TRUE girls know NOT to desecrate either "The Song Of Bernadette" or Jennifer Jones!!!!! When Frantique does, the wrath of the Raving Queen is incurred, which is worse than the Wicked Queen from "Snow White!"
"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?" darlings????
It sure ain't YOU, Frantique!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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