Monday, January 23, 2012

Girls, We LOVE Joan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



"You miserable tramp!"
"If you have a crush on me, you must be gay!!!"
--Joan Rivers


Darlings, I have loved Joan, since I first saw her, as a child, back in the Sixties, on television, in something called "The National Trivia Test," where you better believe I got all the answers right, especially those questions dealing with child stars, as I could have been one, myself!!!!!!!!

When I got older, and could stay up later, the only time I would really watch "The Tonight Show," was when Joan was Johnny's guest host. Though iconic, Johnny Carson was as bland as the Nebraskan cornfield he must have crawled out of. Joan was genuinely funny--and a big old fag hag!!!!!!!

You have to hand it for Joan, for maintaining her sanity during the tragic period of her husband, Edgar's, suicidal death. And you have to give her credit for raising Melissa, who, if such a thing is possible, is even more homely than Sarah Jessica Parker, and has made more of a career out of being a celebrity's child, than any celebrity's child I know. Thank God her mother was Joan, else she would probably be outside hospital ER's, copping doses of meth!!!!!

And even though Joan, having had more face lifts than the six my late, lamented Aunt Katie, had, may look grotesque enough to portray Miss Havisham, her rapier wit and biting voice can still cut through the air with brilliant comic precision. I hope Joan goes on forever, because there is no one else like her!!! Not even yours truly, darlings, though I have to acknowledge a debt of gratitude and influence to Joan, whose ability to maintain a schedule (as evidenced in the documentary film, "Joan Rivers--A Piece Of Work") is uncanny; honey, some days, I have trouble just getting out of bed, never mind flying to Salt Lake City at three in the morning. Not me, loves!!!!! I am in curlers by then!!!!!!!!

Some twenty years back, Joan surprised the hell out of me, in the only time I have seen her live. She was portraying a character, having taken over for Linda Lavin in Neil Simon's "Broadway Bound". I was curious as hell to see how she would handle not only material not her own, but a straight, dramatic role. Well, Joan pulled it off with all the aplomb of her doing her comic act at the Sands in Vegas!!!
It was truly amazing and very moving. So, let me tell you, there is even more to Joan than...Joan!!!!!!

Joan Rivers has been with me throughout almost every stage of my life. So has Elizabeth Taylor, but, alas, Liz has gone to her reward, that great Cartier's In The Sky!!!! I expect Joan will be with me for a good deal longer. And as I transition from Middle Age to God knows what, Joan, I hope, will be along to supply me with laughter on the journey!!!!!!

I love you, Joan!!!! What a tramp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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