Not only did he seem bored, honeys, so did most in the audience, as well as that lifeless hostess, Ellen DeGeneres.
The important thing about last night, darlings, was that Amy Adams looked stunning. I mean, when doesn't she? And that both she and MERYL--yes, MERYL, who also knows how to dress for these things--got up to dance, during the "Happy" number.
As for the rest of it...well, it went as I expected, with "Gravity" winning all the major awards, and then, for PC reasons, "!2 Years A Slave" being handed Best Picture.. It is not Southern trash, like "Hurry, Sundown," by any means, but give me "Gone With The Wind" any day. And before someone on here calls me a racist, let me remind them that, before you were born, lambchop, I marched for peace and freedom, singing, with Joan Baez, in the name of Angela Davis!!!!!!! Two names I am sure you never heard of! So, there!
Getting back to "Gone With The Wind," for a minute--if they could do a tribute of sorts to "The Wizard Of Oz," why not this other 1939 gem? Whioch also turns 75 this year!!!!!!! The reason, darlings???? "12 Years A Slave!"
You would have thought, especially those of you who know me, that the 'Oz" tribute would have been the evening's highlight. I had no idea it was coming; early on, when Ellen referred to a man looking like Liza Minnelli, I did not realize, it WAS Liza. I did know that Lorna, and Joey--who never appears at anything!!!-- were next to her,so, I wondered, what's going on? Were they going to prop her up on stage, while she tries to belt out "Maybe This Time" one more time?
So, when I saw there was going to be an 'Oz' tribute, I was thrilled. But, instead of letting the film speak for itself, they did a "Dark Side Of The Moon" riff, running the film to the disgraceful accompaniment of a disgraceful rendition of "Over The Rainbow" by the disgraceful Pink! Pink, indeed!
Dumb bitch is what I call her! That designation also goes to the Academy, for putting this together; couldn't someone of class, or distinction, like MERYL, or Amy, have done the song? Hell, couldn't they have begged Streisand???? Well, maybe they did!
The most important thing about the 'Oz' tribute, darlings, was when Whoopi, who introduced it, reminded how those of a Certain Age could only see it once a year! Now, with DVDs and such, you can see it..whenever, though I, being spoiled, living in New York, always wait for it on the screen, because, once you have seen it there, you never go back. Whoopi reminded everyone how it was the Baby Boomers, who watched it each year, the endless anticipation days before, the endless discussions days afterward, that made it the Film Classic Of The Twentieth Century. Were it not for us, darlings, it might have been just another Hollywood bauble, instead of the Gold Standard it has become. Not to mention my STILL All-Time Favorite Movie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
At least that tramp, Jennifer Lawrence, did not win! And where was Joan Rivers? No pre-Oscar show, and she would have been a hell of a lot better than Ellen--so would I!!!! I can just hear her now, saying to Jennifer "What a traaaaaaaaaaaamp!!!!!!!!!!!!" Indeed!
Poor Sidney. Dragged from his Farina for the homage to "12 Years A Slave." No wonder, he looked so befuddled on stage, during the presentation.
Bette Midler has no voice any more. What a cliche--"Wind Beneath My Wings" during the Memoriam. The only thing it did for me was make me grateful I was watching with MY wind--my beloved, Monsieur!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How do I even begin about Kim Novak, girls?????????? The word I heard was she was getting an Honorary Oscar!!!!!!!!! Maybe, after the Academy saw how she looked and sounded, not to mention how she dressed--can you believe it, an acme of Fifties glamour in Hollywood, dressed like Kathy Bissell on one of her commercials??????????--the Academy, on air, decided to revoke that honor!
It certainly looked that way!
Congratulations to Matthew McConaughey for transcending into a Serious Actor from a Hollywood Hunk! Of course, he is still fine to look at, girls!!!!!!!!!!!! And thank God, the audience did not fall into a Buddhist chant at the sight of Philip Seymour Hoffman's Memorial Picture! Let's face it, as far as I am concerned, Shirley Temple and Joan Fontaine were more important!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How about Gojira doing a Snickers commercial, to advertise his new movie, coming in May? I knew our lovable reptile friend was up to something. And who knew he could water ski? But he is comfortable in the water, after all! That was a surprise and a highlight!
And lively! Unlike this year's Oscar, which were among the most boring I have ever watched. Of course, the damn thing ran till midnight! I may not have flown back on the Red Eye, but, with the little sleep I got, and the way I feel right now, it seems like I did!
How does one improve this mess? I am not sure there is an answer!
To think, it actually made me long for Paula Zahn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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ReplyDeleteAgreed: it was a total borefest, the most lackluster Oscar show in ages. On the plus side, since our usual hostess cancelled her party due to last-minute illness, she picked a good year for it: the party would have inevitably dragged.
ReplyDeleteEllen DeGeneres' shtick was stale five years ago, last night proved staler yet: she needs to be crumbled into bits and fed to the pigeons in Central Park. How this completely humorless, misanthropic woman became Middle America's Daytime Sweetheart is the bafflement of our times: all she does is pick youTube wanna-bes out of a hat each week. If thats all it takes, you and I should be hosting...
At least the stage decor was clean and sharp, providing a stunning backdrop for the presenters, and Cuaron deservedly won as director over that pretentious fop Steve McQueen (emphasis on annoying queen: he makes Tyler Perry seem palatable, which takes some doing, let me tell you).
I disagree with you re Bette Midler: I was shocked at how good she sounded! Way better than any other diva of her era (Babs, I'm looking at you). I do agree "Wind" is the worst song she ever made millions from: it needs to be buried and forgotten. The only person to ever sing that song and not have it come off as a patronizing insult was Gary Morris, who did it years before Bette.
The less said about Pink's "Over The Rainbow," the better: I would rather have heard Whoopi do it. She's a better actress than she is a singer: someone please hire her to do another supporting role, stat! And yeah, not honoring GWTW alongside Oz out of deference to the odious, pandering "12 Years A Slave" was a tasteless omission. "12" will be utterly forgotten by everyone of every race within 12 days.
Why do you think Jennifer Lawrence is a tramp? For her young age, she's been remarkably good in most of her roles, and provided a hilarious foil for Amy Adams in "American Hustle" (the two of them MADE that film work). JLaw also seems refreshingly free of hubris compared to useless mannequins like Kristin Stewart.
Kim Novak: OMG. How terribly sad to see her like this. How could they let her appear without at least running a comb thru her hair? Poor thing: I understand she was nearly destroyed mentally by her time in Hollywood, but she should let people keep their memories of her iconic glamour. Seeing her on a world stage looking and sounding like the demented homeless cat lady from "The Simpsons" was jarring.
Several of the In Memoriam phots broke my heart, most especially Richard Matheson. His passing marks the end of a delightful era of highbrow fantasy/horror masquerading as lowbrow entertainment. Matheson was to television what Ray Bradbury was to literature, how poetic that they passed within a year of each other. R.I.P. to both.
ReplyDeleteDid you see that scene from "American Hustle," between Jennifeer Lawrence and Amy Adams? She was a tramp there, and, I think that is the full extennt of her acting range. She does not strike me as someone who can do somehting more challenging, or give a character of that sort depth, like Amy Adams.
I would love to host hte Oscars. You would look fabulous in a tux. We would be brilliant. But, next, to Ellen De Generes, so would the monkey typing out "Hanlet" on an old Royal. They had Ellen seven years ago, and she was no good; why bring her back?
Kim Novak was hearbreaking; she should not have appeared. And I am sick of their BS political correctness by naming 12 Years A Slave Best Picture. It used to be about merit. I have no interest in seeing it.
"Rebecca" might have compensated for all this. But the weather was so ambiguous, we were not sure to tgo, so we didn't!