Friday, July 12, 2019

This May Be The Only Film In History Made, Where Milton Bradley's Tasteless Late Sixties Game, "Feely Meely," Walks Off With The Film!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                                    Let me make one thing clear--"Annabelle Comes Home" is not "Lassie Come Home," which featured the charms of Lassie, and juveniles Roddy McDowall and Elizabeth Taylor.

                                       While it features Mckenna Grace, who seems to have some kind of deficient growth disorder, as she seems not to have grown a bit since playing in Rob Lowe's aborted version of "The Bad Seed," as the only juvenile, there is no charm at work, here.  If she continues not to grow, she could be the horror child sought by every filmmaker.

                                           Veterans Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga barely get screen time.  Worse yet, so does "Annabelle."  I wanted more from this doll, as I believe it is her last movie, so she should have flown through the air, cackled, and menaced more than by just sitting in a chair.

                                             I give Vera Farmiga credit for delivering that monologue on evil to her daughter, with a straight face.  Honestly, I do not know how she did it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                               The film degenerates into a babysitter movie.  Judy (Grace) the daughter of  The Warrens (Farmiga and Patrick Wilson) is being watched for the evening by Mary Ellen (Madison Iseman), and her nosy friend who starts all the trouble, Daniela (Katie Sarife).  She is really stupid, and deserves everything she gets, for being so nosy.

                                                  The girls decide to placate Judy (Grace) by playing a game with her. They choose "Feely Meely."  Now, since this film is set in the Eighties, I do not know how a game from the Sixties could have made its way into this time frame.  But it was a brilliant move, because it was so tasteless.  Milton Bradley really scammed buyers, with this game that could have been made at home, with an old box and fabric, plus holes cut into the sides.  But with the MB touch, it went skyrocketing.  I am not sure it did all that well, and I sure did not own it, nor did anyone I know.

                                                     The game came with objects you stuck inside the box, and a person would draw a card, with an object to feel for, and try to feel and guess the item.  Of course, you know what kids eventually did with this--they took the most disgusting things imaginable, and stuck them in the box!!!!!!!!!!!   Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww!  Grossness plus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                        It was the highlight of the movie, let me tell you.  Poor Annabelle got shunted to the side, and when she ends up in her case made by divine church window glass, one wonders if she will come back.
For now, Annabelle has returned to her case.  But if the profits from this drek are enough, you know she will be back for more.

I wonder what Milton Bradley game will be exploited.  How about "Go To The Head Of The Class?"

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