Girls, It's Not As Easy As You Think

Let me tell you up front, girls, being gay in New York is not as easy as it seems. Freedom and options come with a price whether that be STD's or discarding your porno sex fantasy notions in favor of reality. Oh, and when I say girls, I mean all you gay guys out there, because from my vantage point the butcher the guy the more inwardly Nelly he is. That's Nelly, not NEELY.

What do you think of this, girls? Two men go out for a two year plus period. They are seen there and about at all the right restaurants. Their sex life may not be perfect, but, hey, you can't have everything. They go to London for a dream of a literary cum theatre trip. The partner calls it their "honeymoon trip" and gives the intended a lovely Victorian night shirt with stripes. I mean, very Cecil Beaton.

Then, just a short time after the two year anniversary, the partner begins to act strangely,
questioning not just the relationship but things he has known about the intended for years, like his penchant for classics and literary ficition, which he then goes on to attack? As well as attacking the intended's friends, whom he has been introduced to, while the intended has not met any of the partner's friends. If, indeed, he had any.

To make matters worse, when problems are recognized and talk begins the intended asks if a break up is desired. This way both can walk away with dignity and no hurt feelings. So what happens? Can you believe this? The partner picks a fight about how they are going to spend the Thanksgiving holiday, and then sends the intended an email saying "I no longer want to have anything to do with you."

Break-up by email? Can you imagine anything more cowardly?

Well, I can girls! Because all of this is exactly what happened to me? Why? Becauase I failed to read signs I did not want to read, and because gay men overall are more coldfooted than their straight coutnerparts when it comes to committment.

I mean, this is just the tip of the iceberg. In their never ending quest to find a relationship, not just get laid, gay men face as much agravation as their straight female contemporaries andt then some!!!!

Everyone says don't for love and it will come. But what happens when you stop looking and it doesn't come. It seems the answer is more gay men need to outgrow their inwardly adolescent behavior before love will find its proverbial way.