Introducing Gay Film #5--1950's "All About Eve!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                  Midway is the perfect spot for this film for burgeoning gay youngsters.  When first submitted, Joseph L. Mankiewicz' script was entitled "Best Performance."  Which is pretty accurate because every actor AND every character in this film is giving a performance, but who the hell is the best one?

                                        "All About Eve" makes more sense, for it gives the characters a central point around which they can all revolve.  This film is ideal for young gays in the throes of puberty, because its real title should have been "How To Be A Bitch."  Every character is an absolute bitch; even the understated Karen, played brilliantly by Celeste Holm, and whose fur coat I want to wear!  Because this film prepares young gays for the world, because, let me tell you, darlings, in order to survive in this world as a gay person, you have to be a bitch.  This film, and Vivien Leigh as Scarlett O'Hara will teach you how.

                                       Really, it is one of the best written screenplays, and almost every line is quotable.  I will share a few of my favorites at the end, but I admired Mankiewicz using theater to poke subtle fun at Hollywood.  And lunch at 21?  Oh, girls, if you haven't, you simply must.  And, of course, with hats.

                                           My favorite scene is in the theater, when Margo pretends not to know Eve is her understudy.  Probably the best example of ensemble acting captured on film.  Regretfully, Celeste Holm is not in this scene.

                                              Marilyn Monroe, as Miss Caswell, a graduate of The Copacabana School Of Dramatic Arts, has a line I have often wanted to use--"You won't bore him, honey.  You won't even get a chance to talk.'"  A star in the making!

                                                   I also want the dress Celeste wears in The Cub Room scene.  Which ends in her breaking understatement with peals of laughter, realizing something no one else around her will--that Eve has abased herself for nothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                     The best thing I can say about this film is it is a learning experience, a pleasure to watch, and the verbal sparring is unequaled.

                                                       If this doesn't make you a bitch, nothing will, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                       Favorite Lines                                                                                                                                                 Lloyd Richards (Hugh Marlowe): "It is about time the piano realizes                                                         it has not written the concerto!"                                                                                                                     Karen Richards (Celeste Holm):  "Don't run out of adjectives, dear."                                                           Birdie (Thelma Ritter) "Well, let's say she thinks only about you."                                                              Margo: "Nice speech, Eve.  But I wouldn't worry too much about                                                              your heart.  You know you can always put that award where your                                                                heart ought to be."

                                                        Max Fabian:  May I say something?                                                                                                              Lloyd Richards:  NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                         Eve:  "She was a liar!  She was a LIAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                                        Watch and learn, juniors!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                        

Happy Feast Of Saint Francis!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

                                   Today is the day to honor the patron saint of animals, and as an animal lover, I try to be as kind as I can to all God's creatures.

                                     This is also a chance to honor all my animal friends who have passed--Baby Mouse (the French poodle of my youth, from 1969 to 1979), Dexter, Cujo, Chloe, Mellow, Rowdy and Nicholas.  I miss them all, and hope to see them again someday.  One of my therapists said that when I pass, Dexter will be waiting for me.  I hope so.

                                        Yes, I am known as The Dog Whisperer in my neighborhood.  I have compassion for pit bulls, and acknowledge them with a smile and a wave, but that is as far as it goes.  I also love cats, like Mr. Kitty Kat and Bodega Cat.  And not to forget my German Shepard friends Bova and Vera, and my favorite canine trio, Naya, Pasta and Obi Wan.  Just a hug and kiss from these still living animals can make my day.

                                           So, I urge all to follow the example of St. Francis.  You don't have to own a pet but be kind to the animals you see.

                                              And if one needs a hug, give it to them!

                                              It will make your day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mike Leigh's Talent Is Still Evident, Despite The Tawdriness Of This Film!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                       I saw two of Leigh's later films, "Secrets and Lies," (1996) and "Vera Drake,"(2004) watching them with great admiration.  "Naked" is an earlier film from 1993, and while I admired it filmically, I found the subject and characters distasteful.

                                        "Naked" struck me as a British version of Martin Scoresese's 1985 film, "After Hours," with Griffin Dunne.  Both are about young men wandering the night lives of respected cities, London and New York.    But the earlier film was never as tawdry as this.  Perhaps Leigh in his own way was trying to replicate or present his own version of the Nighttown sequence in Joyce's "Ulysses."

                                           David Thewlis, in an excellent performance, plays Johnny, a drifter from Manchester (at least that is what we're told, because the script is not big on information) who has come to London for who knows what?  The opening shows him shagging a woman, then stealing her car.  He then goes on to have sex with just about every woman he encounters, including an old flame of his from back home, Louise, played by Lesley Sharp.  She seems to be the most stable character in the film--certainly her roommate Sophie (Kaitlin Cartlidge) is not--but why would Louise take up with this loser, not to mention a sadist who calls himself Sebastian, but is really Jeremy?  Does anyone care about these characters?  I certainly did not!   And are any of them some kind of catch?  No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            Whether this is Leigh's central point, a cautionary tale for single women, a depiction of the sordidness of lower life in London--and John Osborne did that better--or all of the above is anyone's guess. Mine would be the last.

                                               But there is no doubt Leigh catches the eerie nighttime beauty of lower-class London, the quiet, the desperate characters, the kind unseen during the day.  Vampires, maybe? Well, of a kind.

                                               Legh's mastery of his actors is impeccable.  His script could have used some trimming.  The point of "Naked" is made, long before its ending.

                                                 Now, go put on some clothes, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                               

                                                    

You Are FORBIDDEN From Watching This TONIGHT, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      Tonight, at 8PM, "Svengoolie" and The Squad are going to desecrate one of the most influential and important films of the twentieth century--"The Wizard Of Oz."

                                        "Svengoolie's" show is not meant to showcase the greatest films of all time.  They will make fun of it and desecrate its sacredness.  I forbid all my readers from watching this.  If you want to see it, rent it on YouTube or buy a DVD.

                                             There is no film like "The Wizard Of Oz."  When it is show properly!

                                            This is my all-time favorite film!  How dare they do THIS??????????

                                          

Girls, Has There Been As Visually Beautiful A Film Since 1978's "Days Of Heaven?????????????????????"

                                Before this film, the last I recall was David Lean's sweeping and snow capped "Doctor Zhivago."

                              "Days Of Heaven" begins in 1916, in Chicago.  Richard Gere and his sister Linda (Linca Manz is superb in the role; what happened to her?) meet up with Brooke Adams on a train bound for the Texas panhandle where most of the film is set. Work is hard, and one goes where it is.  The film is low on narrative, but what it makes up for in beauty is worth it.

                                 Watching "Days Of Heaven" is like opening a vintage photo album from the period and staring at the pictures as though they come to life.  Which they do on the screen.  Drawing from the works of American painters like Edward Hopper and Grant Wood, adding in blazing shots of sunrise and sunset, with live shadowed figures silhouetted against them, the film is almost a poetic visual meditation on human existence.   Don't be fooled by the slow pacing; this is probably Terrence Malick's best film.

                                   I can tell you that it is, because I saw his "The Thin Red Line" in 1998, and while striking in spots, it was a bore.

                                    "Days Of Heaven" exemplifies filmmaking and a filmmaker at the height of his powers.

                                      Don't wait for 48 years, like me, girls, to see it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      A MUST for cineastes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"I Think The Ground Just Shook 'Cause Everywhere You Look/ALL You See Is/ BABES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                 Oh, girls, I am telling you!  I just loved the theme song to "Babes."  This was some sort of outgrowth of "Hairspray" (from John Waters in 1988) to give a voice to plus sized women.  The show told the story of three sisters in a city (Was it New York of L.A.?  I cannot remember!) who, like all of us at one time, were trying to become career girls!  The gimmick was their size, and Wendie Jo Sperber, standing, was the biggest and the best of them.

                               The show debuted in 1990, lasted a season, and had a moderate success in reruns.  I can still hear the theme song running through my head.  The show only did something for Sperber, who, sadly died in 2005 at the age of 47 from breast cancer.  What a shame.

                                 And what a shame TV still does not give plus sized women a chance!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 Unless casting for a circus sideshow.  The double standard still applies!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   Hey, Beanie Feldstein!  How about a reboot of "Babes?????????????????"

                                 

 

Happy Feast Of The Guardian Angels!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     I salute my guardian angel, darlings, because I know he/she has a full-time job having been assigned to me.  But I am grateful he/she has gotten me out of many scrapes during my youth, and I know I have him/her to thank.

                                       Alas this is also a sad day.  Last year, on this day, a classmate I had known since junior high, Lenise, passed away from pancreatic cancer.  David and I had stayed at her house in Highland Park, NJ during the time of my 50th high school reunion.  I cannot believe that is now three years ago, and she is not here.  Very sad, but as always, may she rest in peace, and may her memory be a blessing.

                                        What a time I have had, girls!  Yesterday we were in the city, seeing a film I had always wanted to see--Terrence Malick's 1978 "Days Of Heaven."  I will do a separate post on that.  The night before we had dinner with friends, a lovely gay couple, one of whom is a former coworker of mine, at Marseille on Ninth Avenue and 45th Street.  It was a delightful evening.  And we took the subway home at night--and survived!!!!!!!!!!!  But, as I told David, he is not to get the idea that this is going to be a habit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                              We also went to see our lawyer, to update our wills, and change our executors.  Now, girls, listen, this is very important.  Whenever selecting a doctor or a lawyer, there are two requirements to remember--he must be accredited and he MUST be good looking!  Without the last, dears, it just will not work.  The lawyer assigned to us was absolutely good looking, as are all my doctors!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I would not have it any other way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                              To make matters worse, my left foot is killing me.  Several weeks ago, I had a blister on my big toe and then one of the smaller toes next to it, and they rubbed together and hurt.  Walking was killing me.  With the bad weather we had in September, and forced to stay indoors, the blisters healed pretty well, but now they are back.  And even though, after the film, David let me go to Barnes And Noble, to scout their Criterion Collection--I found four films:  "The Damned," by Luchino Visconti," "The Last Picture Show," by Peter Bogdanovich, "Mulholland Drive," by David Lynch (Girls, I just HAD to have that!) and Mike Leigh's "Naked."   I think we will watch that one tonight.

                                                 And, yes, I made an appointment with my podiatrist, but I could not get one before November 10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Can you believe it?????????????????????????

                                               Right now, girls, it is a pleasure to be writing this blog, because at least I get off my feet, and give them a rest.  Heaven help me if I became a dancer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                Really, hons, it's been a taxing couple of days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!