Coney Island In The Winter Can Be A Candy Coated "Doctor Zhivago" Kind Of Wonderland!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                           Actually, darlings, it depends.  Yes, one can wander through the snow and fantasize about looking like Julie Christie as Lara--don't we all?????????--but let me tell you the real scoop on this place come wintertime.

                             When snow is not on the ground, I have walked along this stretch in the dead of winter, with the wind blowing off the ocean with such force it almost knocked me off the boardwalk.

                               The parks where the rides have been encased in huge metal gates and fences with some fierce locks on them.  Only teens dumb enough to subway surf, or do what was done to a boy by his "alleged" friends on the Queensboro bridge recently, would venture inside.

                                 Guess what, guys?  It would be your last time.  Because the interiors are carefully guarded by German Shepherd dogs, and let me tell you, I have seen them up close, and, despite my ability to charm almost any living beast, these protectors are out to do a job, not cozy up to animal lovers.  Anyone who gets into the park with even one of these does not stand a chance!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   So, darlings, if you want to enjoy the snow and the setting, fine.

                                   But give these dogs plenty of space.  They are service dogs, but their service  means business!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     Cute they may be, but they are not there to pet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, Tonight The Sven Squad Is On Its Own!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 This is now the time of month, darlings, where Svengoolie takes a night off, and he leaves the show to The Sven Squad--Gweengoolie, whom I like, Nostalgiaferatoo, who is the best, and The Imp, who is not.  Tonight, they are showing something fresh and exciting--the 2007--my God, has it been that long? -- film of Stephen King's novella, "The Mist."  A mysterious mist engulfs a town, forcing some of the town's citizenry into a supermarket.  One of these is Mrs. Carmody played by the great Marica Gay Harden.

                                  Lambs, as soon as Marcia steps onto the screen the picture is packed up and hers. She steals every scene she is in, enlivening this film which would have been deadly dull without her, and which, until the twist ending, becomes that once Maricia is off camera.

                                   But while she is on, what a hoot!  Oh, and that twist ending?  Of course, I am not going to reveal it, but I can say that when I first saw this film in the theater 19 years ago, it chilled me.  Now, it seems prescient to our time.

                                     Join us all, including Baby Gojira, Little Pippin and Kerwyn for "The Mist" tonight.  Channel 13 isn't showing anything good tonight, so what is your choice???????????

                                      See you tonight at 8PM, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 

Girls, It Is Time To Bring Back The Grind House!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                       There is trash, and there is trash!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      I am not talking about the 2007 knockoff by Quentin "Talentless" Tarantino, but the real thing--the sleaze palaces of old that show provocatively exploitational films.  You know, like "Driller Killer--" oh my God, girls, such fun--or Russ Meyer's "Faster Pussycat, Kill Kill."

                                        There is even better stuff out there. Generally curated by overweight middle aged male losers still living at home with their mother--might be a serial killer--but whose one talent is how to build a theater and a rep for sleaze cinema.  Not porn, darlings, but sleaze.

                                        When West 42nd Street in Manhattan was Sleazeville, there were at least one or more of these grind houses.  How about branching out to the boroughs--oh, my God, the violence prone Bronx would be perfect for one, as would sleazy parts of Brooklyn and Queens.  I am not including Staten Island here, because it is already a grind house in itself.

                                           Of course, many of this material's patrons would have to come by Uber, as they would not be seen walking in these neighborhoods.  I mean, what chance would they have to stay alive???????????????  I include myself in here, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             But imagine a full evening of sleaze in a trashy environment??????????? What a different kind of fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                               Sometimes, old is better than new!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, Who Would Have Thought This Bit Of Charm Is In New Jersey?????????????????????????

                             This almost reminds me of the Whistle Stop Cafe in "Fried Green Tomatoes."

                               "Lucille's Luncheonette" is actually located in some town I never heard of in New Jersey called Barnegal.   I certainly want to go there.  And, girls, just look at the cute mascot out front.

                                   That tells me it is somewhere in South Jersey, because that is a replica of the Jersey Devil, the legendary creature who dwells in the Pine Barrens.   Isn't he cute?  I just want to cozy up next to it, and have my picture taken, darlings.  I am sure I would not be the first visitor to do so.  But what does one wear when going to South Jersey??????????

                                    This is one of those oddities that makes New Jersey SO New Jersey.  To think of what I am still discovering about my heritage.  And at the age of 71.  Though my professional age is 24, darlings, and don't you forget it.

                                       What an emblem of charm.  I cannot wait to visit it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         I wonder what is their culinary special??????????????????

                                   

"Fryin' 'Mother's Oats' In Grease!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                 Darlings, speaking of closet cases, I happen to be a closet Plantation Princess.

                                 Oh, the South is too warm and politically out of touch for me to live there, but that does not mean I can't relate to Vivien Leigh as Scarlett or Rue McClanhan as Blanche.  That is Blanche Devereaux, darlings, not DuBois.

                                      A real Southun' breakfast is frying "Mother's Oats," or "Quakers'" in grease.  It will make you feel like you are dining at Tara in your best frock.  Thank God I have David who would have to help lace me up in that corset.

                                         What a Southun' way to start the day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            And since now I do eat my oatmeal close to raw, I am halfway there anyway.

                                            Maybe I will be elected Magnolia Queen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Is Norman Bates Filmdom's Most Notorious Closet Case?????????????????????????????

                                    Alfred Hitchcock made a smart decision in casting good looking Anthony Perkins as Norman Bates.  Serial killers hide in plain sight, and if Norman were to venture in public among a crowd, heads might turn, but no one would suspect this young man to be a serial killer.

                                     Those having seen "Psycho" know Norman is a serial killer, because, while he is seen murdering Marion (Janet Leigh) and Pendergast (Martin Balsam) it is revealed he has killed other girls and tossed their bodies into the swamp, which is a landkill.

                                          But I am here to write about Norman as a closet case.  From my experience, I have found them to be the most dangerous gays alive. Now, Norman was raised in isolation with his mother, Norma.  That does not necessarily make one homosexual, but she instilled in him a hatred for other women, and if he found himself attracted, well, after her death, we know what happened.

                                           And how about that bedroom, with the messy bed, teddy bears, dolls and other antiquities?  This is the bedroom of a deranged child, and one can only guess what Norman fantasizes about when in bed.

                                               Norman has never had a sexual experience in his life.  Now, take a good look when he and Sam Loomis (John Gavin) are chatting at the hotel front desk, while Lila (Vera Miles) goes on to search the house.  As Loomis talks to Norman, he becomes more and more nervous, and Perkins as an actor does this thing with his one hand where he is continually tapping the hotel desk while he talks, almost as if he was doing this unconsciously.  I maintain his suppressed homosexuality is looming, because, I mean, John Gavin, hubba hubba!  And the idea of he and Perkins, hubba hubba.

                                                  I think this scene shows Norman nursing and trying to fight off a hidden attraction to men.  This ends when he realizes Lila is gone, and cleverly figures out where, and knocks Gavin out to look for her.

                                                    The next time you watch "Psycho," darlings, pay close attention to this scene.  Not only does it reveal Norman as a closet case, but I maintain it demonstrates that if Norman was not caught and institutionalized he, as "Mother," would not only go on to kill  more young girls, or, if that supply should run out, then attractive young men would suddenly vanish.

                                                        Yes, Norman is a closet case.  And if I had been that fly at the end, I would have gotten off that hand fast!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Ash Wednesday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                         Remember, no meat today.  This is a time for reflection as Lent begins.  More important than giving up chocolate bars is what is in your heart.  Take some time to examine such, each and every day during this forty day period.

                         Whether or not getting ashes, one can still recall what Jesus did for us, and be thankful that because of such we are here.

                             Happy Ash Wednesday, girls!!!!!!!!!!  May you have a blessed Lent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!