This Episode Of "Elsbeth" Was Written Based On The True Nature Of Beanie Feldstein!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                               But before I get to Miss F, darlings (I can't even stand to write her name!) let me say a few words in praise of this show!

                               Girls, if you have not seen "Elsbeth," you must.  It is the gayest New York City show on prime-time television!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 The acting is always superb, whether from Carrie Preston, the supporting cast, or the amazing array of guest stars this show manages to get.  Hey, "Law And Order" franchise, take a lesson!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  Carrie Preston is a shrewd blend of comic genius and ingenue warmth, reminiscent of Leslie Caron in "Gigi."  But her real co-star is Dan Lawson, the show's costume designer, whose outfits for Elsbeth are amazing, ablaze with color, and I want to wear all of them.  Maybe I should have Dan fly east when he has a moment, and design me a few items.  Hear that, Dan????????????????????

                                  I mean, did you see the episode where he replicated Cecil Beaton's designs from "My Fair Lady?"  Oh, my God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   The aforementioned Miss Feldstein was this week's guest star, and the first shot of her coming down the stairs in a wedding gown, looking like a cannoli overstuffed with cream, said it all.  She played a self-entitled bitch who thinks it is all about her, and when someone tells her it is not, well, that is the end of her!

                                     She does it with those popping eyes so wide she looks like she is hypo-thyroid!  The story is no one shows up for her party.  You know, the Anne Shirley routine from "Stella Dallas" (1937).  But while I felt sympathy for Anne, I felt none for Beanie.  Who the hell does she think she is?  I bet she has dreams of playing "Evita."  You could not build a terrace strong enough to support her on, while singing "Don't Cry For Me, Argentina."  Or trying to.  Not to worry, girls; I am certain Patti would not allow it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      Was Beanie good?  Yes, she hit the marks and said her lines, and Lawson did a remarkable job of designing outfits that actually looked becoming on her--a miracle!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                          But he and Carrie Preston are the true stars of "Elsbeth," so girls, you really must tune in for some New York City fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            I understand next week's guest will be Griffin Dunne!  Hubba hubba!

                                            Can we even HOPE for Jonathan Groff???????????????

Should The Raccoons Who Traipse Across The Delacorte Stage Have Equity Contracts????????????????????????

                               I say "Yes," though let me qualify something.

                              Summer will soon be here.  So, it is time to consider this!

                               I have been to the Delacorte several times in my New York City life, and have sat pretty close to the stage, at times.  Never, in my visits, have I seen a raccoon run across the stage.  Though I do recall one performance--I cannot recall the show--where audience members, particularly the women, were disturbed by a bat flying close to the theater area.   I was fascinated; I thought it was cute.  And who knows if Flaco, in his free year, didn't catch a show at the Delacorte??????????

                                 Actors have reported scenes being interrupted and them being flustered, by the sudden appearance of these creatures.  Members of the rodent family, I believe.  I always thought the one thing to worry about performing outdoors was bugs flying into one's mouth!

                                 Apparently not, because the raccoons have almost become a part of the Delacorte experience!  For that reason, I think they should have Equity contracts!

                                  Make sure the props departments do not use food during shows!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, Join Us Tonight At 8PM, As "Svengoolie" Presents "The Car!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                   This film was released in 1977, so I am not sure it was a TV movie or a theatrical release.  Its redeeming feature is James Brolin when he was really HOT, and way before he met You Know Who.  The supporting cast, a good one, seems to be made up of TV types, which makes me question the film's origin further--Ronny Cox, Kathleen Lloyd, The Richards Sister--Kim and Kyle, John Marley, John Rubinstein.  Speaking for myself, since eighth grade I have never trusted girls named Kyle, because there was one that year who was a little bitch, even if she was the dumbest thing in our class.  I wonder how she turned out.  Probably eating spuds out of ash cans.  I hope!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     Anyway, I digress.  Remember "Duel" in 1971?  And "Christine," in 1983?

                                    I think this film will not be much different from them.  Especially "Duel."  A car is running rampant through some Podunk town, killing people, and Brolin, as the sheriff, has to deal with this.  It sounds like Brolin here is standing in for Dennis Weaver, but, like I have said, he was HOT then, so he could make the film bearable.  But I really do not have high expectations for this.

                                     Still, I can't say switch to something else, as I have not given this a chance, having never seen it.  So, I will.  I hope The Sven Squad is on; this may be one film when they are needed.

                                       Meanwhile, darlings, I have wardrobe decisions to make.  So, we will see you at eight, for this journey down Memory Lane.

                                         To think this film is 49 years old.  The same year I graduated from college!!!!!!!!!!!

What Did These Critics See In This "Death Of A Salesman" That I Did Not???????????????

                               The revival of Arhtur Miller's iconic play, which I saw weeks before, opened last night, and the critics went wild!  I can't believe it!  Laurie Metcalf deserves all the praise heaped upon her here, because I am telling you, darlings, her Linda is the engine running this show.

                                  And by the way, I stand by what I said here, weeks before!

                               Nathan Lane, I can only hope, has improved in the role since I saw him, though from this photo, I wonder.

                                But not a negative word about the staging, let alone placing it in the Winter Garden.  The newspapers went wild over Joe Mantello's conception, which I could not stand, and still have so many questions about.  There was a 'Times' article about him reading rough drafts of the Arthur Miller script(s), and learning things from them.  Fine, dear, you honored the text, but how about the visual conception?   I understand directors like using staging to reimagine the play but give us a clearer idea of what you are doing.

                                   Still, the text was honored, and I left emotionally drained.

                                   Nathan Lane is now the Toast Of Broadway, and now he wants to do fewer shows, and maybe retire after doing this role?   Oh, Nathan, hon, don't!!!!!!!!!!!!!  You signed on knowing it was a killer role, so do it.  No social life between shows, remember?  Ever since Beanie Feldstein threw her tantrum with "Funny Girl," especially after not getting a TONY nomination, actors have been catered to more than they should.  And for the record, though not on Broadway, I did a show where I had to do four performances a weekend and then work a regular job the rest of the week!  So, I am not just whistlin' "Dixie," darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Audiences want to see Nathan Lane, not a substitute.  Soon, we will have audiences flocking to only specified performances, while the star or stars' night off gets audiences harder to perform to, as they care less.

                                    For God's sake, Nathan, take a chill pill!  Rest on the show's dark day.

                                   And this retirement thing?  Just a ploy for attention!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 Even if he does Miss Hannigan in "ANNIE," Nathan will not stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This Is Who Should Be Hosting The TONY Awards!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            As if it is not bad enough Hollywood has turned into a freak show, now my beloved Broadway is about to implode!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             Yesterday, it was announced that something or someone called PINK--how dare one mock my signature color? --will host the TONY Awards.  At first, I thought the show was going to have everyone dressed in pink, which would be a lovely idea, but this musical wannabe, who will never host again after this year, I can promise you is another in a series of mistakes by the entertainment industry.  Like having Mariska Hargitay replace Daneil Radcliffe in "Every Brilliant Thing."

                                 The TONY Awards should not be pompous and pretentious, which is why I vote for Linda Richman and Liz Rosenberg.  I understand Liz has joined Linda at some of BARBRA's venues.  How about her hosting the TONYS?  Great idea, but are you kidding?

                                    Linda, with her coffee, and maybe a mention about her daughter, Robyn, will bring some talent and levity to the show, that this PINK thing does not have.  And Liz has the greatest sense of humor; calling Madonna a tramp and a "korva."  If anyone should know about Madonna, it is Liz Rosenberg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         You want to talk of tramps, darlings?????????  Even Liz and Madonna would be appalled at the way today's young girls dress!  Tramps!  Someone needs to teach them some class.  Madonna dresses better than these girls, although I would not recommend showing one's quinny as Madonna did in that sex book.  As a gay man, I could not bear to even LOOK at it!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            ANNA, could you provide a tutorial for today's young girls???????

                                           But really, these gals have talent, and that is what the TONY Awards celebrates.  Which reminds me, what the hell is going to be nominated for "Best New Musical?"  It seems all the big arrivals are revivals!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             Like Lucy and Ethel in the Fine Arts Club, vote for Linda and Liz to host the TONY Awards!

                                               As Linda would say, "Talk amongst yourselves."

                                              We (Linda and I) will give you a topic---

                                               What the hell is wrong with Broadway???????????????

She Won't Be Mentioned In "The Devil Wears Prada 2," But These Patterns Are Interesting To Look At For Summer Wear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love discovering new designers, and Lauren Conrad is one I recently discovered.  Now, girls, I discovered her on a KOHL's Mom commercial, but it is not like I am telling you to shop at KOHL's.  I mean, a girl's could lose her reputation that way.  And that actress is SO annoying!

However, with the economy tanking, and all of us able to afford less, it would not surprise me if some of my girls have shopped surreptitiously at KOHL's.  It is one step above a thrift shop, though I understand, in the right locale, like Manhattan's Upper East Side, sometimes one can find amazing items at such shops.

Have I ever done this?  I will never tell!

The red dress is my favorite, as it is a color I am instantly drawn to.  Wearing it could make me feel like Donna McKechnie, and that is not bad at all.

But I also love the short summer frock with the parasol.  It can make me feel petite again, and girls, wouldn't we all want that?  I know I would feel so carefree and breezy in that outfit.

No, you will not hear Lauren's name mentioned in the 'Prada' sequel, but she does turn out some interesting work.  These items are worthy of attention, especially for young career girls just starting out.  How well I remember those days!

Remember--being short on cash does not mean you have to look cheap!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Girls, Wait Till You Hear This!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                              The first time I heard the song "What Did I Have? (I Don't Have Now)" was when Eydie Gorme did a cover of it, belting her heart out.  For many it became the definitive rendering of that, and being the last of the belters, I have been singing it Eydie's way for years.

                              But first let me get back to "On A Clear Day You Can See Forever," one of the most ignored musicals, along with "RAGS."

                                 David and I saw a Broadway revival of it in 2011 that introduced to us a young lady named Jessie Mueller, who for several years thereafter, was the Toast Of Broadway.  Alas, Jessie, where are you now, when so needed???????????

                                   But the musical had been dramatically reconfigured so that homosexuality played a part in it, and when Harry Connick Jr. on stage wax so afraid to kiss David Turner, it became a laugh fest.  Except when Jessie was on.

                                     ENCORES has done this show with Kristin Chenowith, and the Irish Repertory Theater has done it with Melissa Erico.  I would have liked to have seen it with her. 

                                        But, like 'Merrily,' has anyone gotten this show right?  The cast album is gorgeous, and Barbara Harris gives the song I mentioned a beautiful vulnerability that makes it achingly heartbreaking.

                                          The cast album is a master class in how this show should be done right.

                                       Here is Barbara singing it the way it should be sung!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     Darlings, if only Broadway was this again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!