Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Sweeties, Isn't YouTube The Greatest???????????????



Well, girls, now that the coroner's report is officially in on the death of 50's sex icon Yvette Vickers--she died of natural causes, most specifically, heart failure, and she WAS 82--it is time to think about those film festivals, honoring her. At least we know now she was not 14, as she claimed, in "Sunset Boulevard," but 22, which would make more sense.

But getting back to the film festival idea, some of the programmers in this town are so shoddy, and their film knowledge so spotted, they would not know Yvette Vickers from Yvette Mimiuex. I can hear them saying, "But they were both blondes."
Yeah, and so is your granny's chin hair!!!!!!!!!!

There is no need to get all worked up, darlings, because I am here to report that you can have your own, private, Yvette Vickers festival in your own home. And NO, I am not suggesting porn. Last night, I discovered that the 1959 Roger Corman classic, "Attack Of The Giant Leeches," all 62 minutes of it, is on YouTube.

Set in the Florida Everglades, this is the film where Yvette plays hot to trot swamp tramp Liz Walker. Poor Liz; I can relate. She is stuck in the backwater of the Everglades, where there is simply nothing to do. Not even a public library to take out books to read, though, I am telling you, girls, Liz is not the kind of gal who would frequent the town library, beyond its corner lamppost. And she wears the kind of clothes that just don't stay in one place when she moves curvaceously.
A girl just has to do something in this burg, so she carries on with local white trasher Cal Moulton (played by Michael Emmett). They just want to get together and do some canoodling whenever they can, especially right by the swamp ground where the leeches lurk. I am told, though I do not recall, that Yvette shows lots of flesh in this film; or, at least, as much as could be legitimately shown in 1959.

However, Liz's equally white trash husband, Dave (played by Bruno Ve Sota) catches up to the lovers, and here comes the classic scene I can still recall from my childhood viewing, the one this film is remembered for. Pointing a gun at the adulterous lovers, with the water sizzling and bubbling behind them, as the giant leeches (who, according to sources, are simply actors with Hefty trash bags on their heads) surface, awaiting fresh fare, as Dave forces Liz and Cal to walk backwards into the swamp, at gunpoint, until they are close enough for the giant leeches to maul them, which they do.

Darlings, I think this is Yvette's finest acting moment. Being forced to ruin her clingy, slutty dress is one thing, her hair another, but knowing that you are going to be eaten alive by giant leeches and there is nothing you can do about it--I swear, when this film was released in 1959, Meryl Streep was about 10 years old. I bet this made an impression on Meryl. Who knows, we might not have had Meryl, if it weren't for Yvette!!!!!!!! And being that she can do anything, I would love to see Meryl recreate this classic scene. If anyone can, she could!!!!!!!!!!!!

But you can see it for yourselves, girls!!!!!! Just go on to YouTube, type in the title (or Google it) and see a REAL trash classic, and learn why there has been such an outpouring of grief for the passing of Yvette.

Oh, by the way, the film was originally to be entitled "The Giant Leeches," as the poster indicated. But I have a feeling that, after her spectacular success as Honey Parker in '50 Foot Woman', when the producers had the good fortune to sign on Yvette, they added "Attack Of" to the title.

And despite what one may think this film is NOT about the Internal Revenue Service!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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