Farewell To The Only Actor, Next To Divine, Who Was Upstaged By A Miniature Poodle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                    Three years before Divine performed coprophagy on the fresh product of a miniature poodle, in 1972's "Pink Flamingos," with both John Waters and the poodle wise enough to keep viewers from vomiting, by cutting to a shot of the dog looking up at Divine, with questioning eyes, as if saying, "What the hell are you doing," Sylvia Miles, who died, at 94, on June 12 of this year, was also upstaged by a poodle.

                                    It happened, just fifty years ago, in the 1969 classic, "Midnight Cowboy," which was memorable for more than just Sylvia.  It was the first, and only "X-rated" film, to win the Oscar for Best Picture.  By the time I saw it, in 1973, it had been downgraded to an "R," though I don't think it was cut, and, eventually, standards changed, so, on its last theatrical revival, what had once been "X," was now a "PG."

                                     Amazingly, Jon Voight, as the stud, Joe Buck, was incredibly HOT in this.  If any of us had hormones, in 1969, and I certainly did, we all had the hots for Voight.  Hard to believe, isn't it, girls, from the way he looks today?????????????????????

                                        Manhattan never looked sleazier than in this film; it outdid even "Taxi Driver," from 1976.  Like the latter film, I would love to see "Midnight Cowboy" now to see how much of the city I now recognize.  I did not see "Taxi Driver," until I had reached adulthood, and moved to New York.  When I saw the film, the scenes with Jodi Foster, as Iris, the teen aged prostitute, (a role I still yearn to play!!!!!!!!!!!!) the scenes I thought were shot in the heart of Times Square were done on Second Avenue in the East Village, which, granted, looked sleazier than when I began to inhabit it, so maybe my perception of "Midnight Cowboy's" locales were also altered by youthful inexperience.

                                   
                                         But back to Sylvia.  In "Midnight Cowboy," for which she received an Academy Award nomination in 1969, for Best Supporting Actress," the actress played an Upper East Side bitch type, named Cass, who has this cute poodle, named Lulu.  She and Joe Buck meet "in passing," as the saying goes, and she brings him home, and they do the deed.  While she is paying him, her husband calls, and while settling accounts with Buck, Cass puts Lulu on the telephone speaker, asking hubby to say hello.  Whereupon we hear a clearly annoyed voice say, through the speaker, "Hello, Lulu, you goddamn dog!!!!!!!!!," and the poodle's ears go up!!!!!!!!

                                          That priceless moment, I believe, cost Miles the Oscar, because Lulu upstaged her.  So, now I can sort of understand why she visibly walked out on the Oscars, that year, after Goldie Hawn beat her for "Cactus Flower."

                                              Still, something has to be said for Sylvia.  I have not seen this film in 46 years, and this is the moment that stays with me the most.

                                               One thing to be said for Sylvia--she could always top herself!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      Oh, boy!  In 1977's "The Sentinel," which ended the movie career of Cristina Raines, and was set in a home on the Brooklyn Heights Promenade, which still stands, Sylvia played Gerda, one half of a questionably dead lesbian couple.  Beverly D'Angelo, as her partner, Sandra, masturbates in front of Cristina Raines, but it is Miles who gets the best line.  When Raines asks Gerda what she and Sandra do--meaning, for a living!!!!!!!--Miles, throatily responds, "We fondle each other!"  Again, the most memorable moment from a nearly forgotten film!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                              Sylvia's almost signature role came in Tobe Hooper's 1981 thriller, "The Funhouse," where she played Madame Zena, who copulates with Wayne Doba as the Deformed Creature, who turns out to be the son of the funhouse's owner, played by Kevin Conway.  The Creature can't get anyone better than Madame Zena to give him the biological action he craves,(nothing wrong there!) but I think even the eccentric Zena is so repulsed by him, she charges for it!  Like most first timers, he spills his spooge on her, and she makes a big squawk about making a mess!!!!!!!!!!!  Again, the most memorable moment in the film!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            Same thing with her almost signature turn as Hannah Mandelbaum, the Jewish matchmaker, in 1988's "Crossing Delancey."  If viewers had not caught on by then, this established Miles' indefinable acting style?  Was she really acting?  Or was she just playing a caricature of herself, as the  public perceived her?  Or was she actually playing herself.  Sylvia somehow managed to turn in a performance, while skirting on a tightrope, blurring reality and fantasy.

                             I have no answer for you.  But, however, or whatever she did, it was always brilliant and engaging.   Remember, this is the woman who poured a plate of party food all over John Simon.  Who deserved it; because this was the man who said Liza Minnelli had the "face of a beagle," (what an insult to beagles!!!!!!!) and whose widow, Pat, is a certified BOW--Bitch On Wheels!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                              By this time, Sylvia was Manhattan's most famous, and welcomed, party crasher. Whenever there was a gathering, Sylvia was there.  I vaguely recall encountering her at some function I went to at Lincoln Center, years back.  And, several times, she sat near me at various theatrical performances we attended.

                               Alas, I wished I had stepped forward to pay her homage.  Now, I will never get a chance to, though, I hope, this post makes up for it!  Not just because Sylvia was a hoot, but because the way the acting game is going, these days, the kind of quirky, mannerism oriented performer that could drive a vehicle, is vanishing.  Brad Dourif and Amanda Plummer are the last of a dying breed. Today, unless you have cookie cutter looks, you hardly have a chance.

                                Sylvia, you will be missed, for your antics, onscreen and off!

                                 Rest In Peace, dear, and say hello to Lulu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!