"I've Seen The Future, And, Kids, It's Not A Lot Of Laughs!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                   You just gotta love someone who would say that, darlings!!!!!!!  The most prescient statement about Things To Come since Victor Hugo first summed things up in "Les Miserables!!!!!!!!"  So, I can tell you, I plan to run, not walk, to see Bette Midler as Sue Mengers in "I'll Eat You Last!"  But I am going to be stampeded, because, girls, I am telling you, as God blew breath into me, I just know every Theater Queen this side of the Hudson will be clamoring to do the same thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     Actually, this play, written by, of all people, John Logan (who wrote "Red") sounds a lot like my life.  Sue Mengers (Bette) sits around her palatial digs, and dishes  to the audience.  Sort of like what happens when visitors come to see me.  I am generally seated in my living room, in the green chair, feet on the ottoman, where I pretty much stay, save when I stand to greet people, and maybe trill a Streisand song or two!!!!!!!!!!  And I sit and dish story after story--just like some of the ones I do on here, darlings, although I have yet to tell the one about Jimmy Farkas and Debbie Osborne!!!!!!!  I am saving that one for if I have a writer's block!!!!!!!!!  Tease, tease, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     And this play should also serve as a lesson (as should this blog) to Douglas Carter Beane, on how to be insightful and witty, and write a good piece of theater, while doing it.  Rather than selling out, as Beane seems to have done, with such high powered shows as "Sister Act" and the now reconstituted "Cinderella!!!!!!!!!"  To think he wrote "As Bees In Honey Drown!!!!!!!"  I can barely believe it, dolls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                       It would seem that "I'll Eat You Last" is the sure fire bitchfest of the Season, and no one loves a good bitchfest more than yours truly, and all my girls on here!  This is probably what Julia Phillips' famous book, "You'll Never Eat Lunch In This Town Again," was SUPPOSED to be--fun, bitchy and entertaining--before getting lost in the mire that was Julia's Pity Party for her drug problems!!!!!!!!!
And speaking of never eating lunch in town again, has anyone told that to Reese Witherspoon?????? High time they did!!!!!!!!!!!  Consider yourself told, Reese honey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         I cannot wait to see this play!  Like I said, it's just like my life!!!!!!!!!  Which I can see for free!!!!!!!!!!!!  This I would not miss for the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                           See you at the box office line, dolls!  And, yes, the Raving Queen will deign to speak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!