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Monday, May 27, 2013

Dreams Of The Raving Queen--Not To Be Confused With "Dreams Of A Rarebit Fiend!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


                               Girls, I am telling you, one thing sleeping in a strange bed has the capacity to cause me to do is dream even stranger dreams.  And last night, I had two doozies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                But, first, let me tell you what I think triggered the first, and most frightening one!!!!!!!!
Within this bucolic country setting is an enclave of lesbians, some of whom came over for desert and coffee, after we finished dinner last night.  There was this one couple, Bonnie and Linda, and oh, my God!!!!!!!!!!!


                                Bonnie, who looked to be about six feet tall, butch as a local truck driver, and a--ahem!!!--full sized figure to match!!!!--I assessed in about five seconds!!!!!!!!  Miss Control Queen Bitch, who wants to run the show, and everyone in her vicinity.  You know, the usual lesbian issue!!!!!!!!  Except that she does not own a single cat!!!!!!!!!!  Then, there was Linda, a control freak of the worst kind--passive aggressive--of ample girth, but more petite in stature, with so much makeup and nail work, I thought she was Divine, impersonating a lesbian!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                These two scared me so much, darlings, they caused me to have the following dream--

                                 I was at work, when I got a call NYC was under attack.  Not by terrorists, but by--King Kong!!!!!!!!!!!  I was so frightened; I called Monsieur in Brooklyn, telling him I was going to get home somehow, though I was not sure if the subways were running.  King Kong was demolishing midtown somewhere, and, even in my dream, I prayed fervently he would not hurt the Theatre District!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  I somehow made it into MACY'S, down on 34th Street, where I ran into Amy, a coworker of mine.  Together, we endeavored to make it back up to Lincoln Center, because, for reasons known only within the dream, we figured King Kong would not come near there.  Just as we were exiting the store, I happened to look up atop one of the door overhangs.  And there was King Kong's face, right up against mine!  I thought I was going to be devoured, right then!

                                   That was the end of that dream!  And it was all due to lesbians!

                                    My other dream was less frightening, but had a gay theme, too!  I was at work, and an older coworker came to me, telling of a young employee there, a gay male, who was struggling with his sexuality, and would I go and talk to him?  Which I agreed to, at once!  And that was it!

                                      Where that came from, I have no idea!  But it was a welcome respite from the King Kong dream!

                                        What surprises me was when the face was up against mine, it was King Kong's and not Bonnie's!!!!!!!!  As it should have been!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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