Tuesday, January 31, 2023

Girls, Can You Believe We Are One Twelfth Through 2023?????????????????


                       It happened sooner than I thought.  January is usually the slowest month for me, because of seasonal affect disorder (SAD) that comes upon me right after the holidays come to an end.



                        And here we are, at the end of the month.  During it, I read eight books to start off the year, David and I saw "Kimberly Akimbo," with the wonderful Victoria Clark, I had a couple of doctor appointments, but nothing like some of the doctor fueled weekdays I have had in the past.  Oh, and I just found this out, though I don't know when--"The Hours," the opera, is to be aired on PBS.  I still hold out hope for "Dialogue Of The Carmelites."



                            Not a drop of snow, either!  Can you believe it?  I hope your January was as pain free and rewarding as mine.  And it is followed by February, a month of romance.



                             But don't follow my example girls.  During my spinsterhood, on Valentine's Day, I would always run "Fatal Attraction."   When I look at clips now, I am astonished.



                               Did I really think going out with my hair looking like Medusa's snakes would get me anyone?  Oh well, the young and the fools know nothing.  Thank God I improved.



                                 See you next month, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                                 

Why Is It So Many Depictions Of Fairyland Include Candy?????????????????

                          Are the creators trying to turn the nation's children into a generation of diabetics?


                         I wonder.  At the end of "The Nutcracker" ballet, Clara and The Prince fly off to the Land Of Sweets.  "Hansel and Gretel" is practically all about candy.  And so many amusement parks use at least peppermint sticks, or what are more colloquially called candy canes, at some point in their depiction of a fantasy world.



                         Sure, we would all like to fly off to fairyland for a time--what a vacation that would be, darlings! --but what about peaceful gardens with flowing water?

                     Like this!!!!!!!  And just look at that dress, girls!!!!!!!!  If it were by, say Balenciaga, wouldn't that just be fabulous?  Better to wallow in this peacefulness than stuff oneself with sugar and elevate one's blood levels.



                       If one examines the great fairy works of literature, "Peter Pan," "Alice In Wonderland,"
even "The Wizard Of Oz," it is obvious that each author has created their own fairyland.


                       This points out to us mortals that we have to find our own fairyland, wherever that may be.


                        I just don't think it would be in New Jersey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Monday, January 30, 2023

Darlings, Imagine This Being Performed By The Sisters Of Perpetual Indulgence!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                      Girls, ever since my iconic experience of seeing "The Sound Of Music," for the first time, in its initial run, at the tender age of eleven, I have been aware of one salient fact--



                        Nuns sell tickets.



                        That's right.  Put a nun, or even more, on stage or screen, and a hit is in the offing.



                       So, of course I really wanted to see "Dialogue Of The Carmelites," at The MET Opera, last Saturday. I listened to it, but that was not the same.  I was hoping it would go to the theater, like "The Hours," but so far, no.  Well, I can hope.



                    But what if The Sisters Of Perpetual Indulgence--San Francisco's gay and merry band of drag nuns; an order that is just calling for me, dolls!!!!!!!!!--were to perform this?  Keys would have to be changed, orchestrations transitioned, and I hope they have a good tenor role.



                      Imagine being prostrate like this on The MET stage!  Not even Jennifer Jones, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                     Sign me on, girls!  I am ready to be an Indulgent Carmelite!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 



                          

Saturday, January 28, 2023

Will Gojira Be A Guest On "Svengoolie" Tonight?????????????????


                                       That is the question of the week, darlings.  See how happy Gojira is, and how much he loves all the children?  That is because he is humanitarian.  So, it would not surprise me if, should Svengoolie show footage of former conventions, Gojira might turn up.  Wouldn't that be exciting, darlings?



                                         Much controversy has been generated over the showing of this truncated version of Gojira's story.  He is not happy about it, but at least is happy that those never having seen him on film will get some exposure.  Like I said before, after this, go out and catch the original, and see the difference for yourself.



                                          Nevertheless. Gojira and Baby Gojira send love to all, and hope you tune in tonight!



                                           He just wanted to have some fun, exploring the Tokyo nightclub scene.



                                           What is there to do on Odo Island???????????????

Friday, January 27, 2023

Girls, Look What Is Showing Tomorrow Night--Albeit Truncated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                              For those of us who grew up with TV showings of the film, there is no need to explain.



                              But for those who did not, some explanation is necessary.  This is the film that made Godzilla (the Americanized renaming of the more apt "Gojira.") a star.  Both the credit and the blame belong to Joseph E. Levine.  Made in 1954, and released there in Japan, the film was not shown here till 1956.  And I did not see the original "Gojira" until 2004, at the Film Forum--forty-one years after having seen this version!  It is also where I found Baby Gojira, and brought him home, never knowing the impact he would have on my life, and still does.  He is my Nicholas.



                              What Levine did was to truncate Ishiro Honda's 1954 artistic masterpiece, removing the anti-war content, preserving the monster scenes, and adding Raymond Burr--then best known for his role as "Perry Mason--" to the footage, as sort of a way to keep the story moving.  What would become ironic, twenty years later, is the name of the character Burr is allegedly playing--a journalist named--are you ready? --Steve Martin!  Today, it is a joke; when I first saw this film, at eight, I thought "What is Perry Mason doing in a monster movie?"



                                  The movie opens in the middle of the original.    Footage is placed differently, giving it a different pace and feel.  The end does remain intact, though it could have done without Burr's moralistic voiceover.



                                    I can tell you that while Gojira (whom I will call him from now on) does get to show his star quality, and upstages everyone, this is not the film that should have been shown.



                                                                         

                             Now, this is the film "Svengoolie" should show--Ishiro  Honda's 1954 artistic masterpiece.  Once seen, you will never go back to the 1956 desecration.



                               I want you to know that both Gojira and Baby G have strong reservations about this being shown.  So, join us with caution, at 8PM, knowing what you are in for.  And afterward, track down a DVD of the above, and see the true masterpiece.



                                Ironically, I own this, and on the other side it has the 1956 redo, which I refuse to watch.



                               I will watch tomorrow to honor Gojira and Baby G!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                    As for "Sventoonie," he is deconstructing the 1961 "Circus Of Fear," with a really renowned cast--Christopher Lee, Klaus Kinski, and Suzy Kendall, who was in 1967's "To Sir, With Love."  The poster indicates bosom potential, and I have always enjoyed horror films set in circuses or amusement parks.  They make such excellent settings.



                                      This film is no masterpiece, so at least it won't be truncated!



                                      But Gojira and Baby G send their love, and hope you join us tomorrow at 8PM!!!!!!!!!!!!



                                       And remember, Gojira is only acting.  He is doing a job, getting paid.



                                     Because, when he comes, it is only in peace, and he wants to help us!



                                 

It Should Have Been Called "Bats And Bosoms!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


                          Really, darlings, that title would have been more appropriate for last week's "Svengoolie" broadcast of Hammer's 1963 "Kiss Of The Vampire."  There is hardly any kissing at all in this film, not even between Edward de Souza as Gerald Harcourt, and Jennifer Daniels as Marianne Harcourt.  They have to be the most dispassionate pair of newlyweds I have ever seen.



                           What I never realized was that, as Svengoolie revealed, this was intended to be a sequel to the superior 1960 film, "The Brides Of Dracula."  Only no one from that film was on hand.  They must have read the script, which makes no sense at all.



                              The newlyweds honeymoon in Bavaria--why?--and get stuck in a storm at the castle of the Ravna residence.  The patriarch, Dr. Ravna, played by Noel Willman, desperately tries to channel Peter Cushing, who often plays the hero; Ravna is a baddie.  His kids are no better; Barry Warren as Carl Ravna is a spoiled Roddy McDowall wannabe, while his daughter Sabena, though lovely, dresses in red throughout, suggesting she has stronger ambitions than this film--she wants to play Lara in "Doctor Zhivago," or Nancy in "Oliver!"  The poor girl hasn't got a chance.



                                   Neither has the viewer, because nothing in this film makes sense.  A group of vampires turns out to be a Jim Jones-like cult, in white robes, which counteracts the vampire mystique.  So does Clifford Evans, as vampire hunter Professor Zimmer, who invokes--are you ready--Beelzebub, the Devil himself--to send a horde of bats through a circular church window into the room, killing off all the cult.  My only regret is that Isobel Black, who livens the film as Tania, is also destroyed; she is the fourteen (hah!)-year- old daughter of the innkeeper and his wife.  I was hoping she would be returned to them.  Black enlivens things whenever on camera; she has both the bosoms and the literal acting chops to sink her teeth into this role.  Thank God for her!



                                     This film you can kiss off, darlings. Though superb visually, the plot makes absolutely no sense.



                                                                    

                       Neither did the film "Sventoonie" chose to destruct, "Voyage To The Prehistoric Planet." Darlings, this had the visual texture of "Santa Claus Conquers The Martians."  It looks as if it could have been shot in the same Long Island airplane hangar.  Except this was a Russian film, which Roger Corman bought the footage of, and then inserted (more on that in the next post!) two actors of stature into the proceedings--Basil Rathbone and Faith Domergue.  I can't say much for them, since only a fraction of the film is seen.  This was some ersatz Jules Vernesque concept of landing astronauts on a planet with phony dinosaurs.  I am telling you, the glass slide lizards in the 1960 "The Lost World" were better than this.  As for Faith, I kept looking at her hair; they tried to make her look like Barbara Parkins, with a back flip.  Come on; Faith was attractive enough, and it wasn't that long since her Fifties reign, so it wasn't like she had aged considerably.   This whole thing was a mess from beginning to end, and when they finally left the planet, I cheered.  Georges Melies did far better with less.


                           This only proves that the Russians can make as crappy movies as the Americans!


                          But what an evening, darlings!  And wait till you see what is coming up next!



                          



                            

This Is An Insult To Drag Queens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                         Not just them, darlings, but the whole LGBQT and transgender communities.



                        Take a look at George Santos.  He is just plain plug ugly.  Even with make-up, an outfit, and accessories, he could never look as good the queen on the right.   So, who the hell is he kidding?  With that paunch?  Maybe he could do Totie Fields, or try to, lacking her wit and humor.



                           Really, George, what are you going to try next?  And citing Baruch College as your alma matter?  Nothing against Baruch College, darlings, but why not the Ivies, George?  Did you really think you would never get found out?



                             Leonardo Di Capprio, who I don't praise often, did such a great job with "Catch Me If You Can." If George is aiming for a movie of his life, forget it!  And who the hell would play him?  Or want to?



                              As a man, you are phonier than Lin-Manuel Miranda.  As a drag queen, you are worse.  Get off that phony stage of yours, George.  You belong in the same home as Baby Jane!



                               Meanwhile, darlings, I am the REAL star!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, January 26, 2023

"Oh. Oh, Yeah. Let's Get One Thing Straight. See, I Never Heard About 'The Red Shoes,' I Never Saw 'The Red Shoes,' I Didn't Give A Fuck About 'The Red Shoes.' "


                                       Darlings, I can just about recite Valerie Clark's monologue, not to mention belt out her number.  Hers, and "Nothing" are the two I do best.  I wonder why Val.  I mean, I did not have any work done, but during my adolescence, and into my early twenties, I had plenty of my own personal issues about my looks.  But that all disappeared as I got older and ran away to the carnival city that New York was for me, in my younger years.



                                      But back to Val.  Am I as sassy as she?  I suppose I can be, but let's face it, girls, when performing that number, even if it is a guy in "Broadway Backwards," some augmentation is necessary.  Otherwise, the whole point of the number is lost.


                                         How to come on ample, but not looking like Dolly Parton.  That, my dears, is the question!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                                            Plastic surgery did not change my life.  But NYC did!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                                            But Val was right.  You know what "won't get you jobs, unless they're yours!"


                                             I know the monologue, steps, and song.


                                             But I still have some work to do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"And Then I Saw 'The Red Shoes,' And I Wanted To Be That Lady, That Redhead!"


                          When I saw "A Chorus Line" for the first time, on October 25, 1975, what resonated with me the most is how more like the cast members I was than I thought being different.  And the first revelation came when Kelly (than Carole) Bishop, as Sheila, spoke those lines.



                            I understood, because I too saw "The Red Shoes," at about age 13.  And though I don't dance, I understand the impetus that drives all in the performing arts.  So, like Kelly/Sheila, I too wanted to be Moira Shearer in the movie.



                              Except for that ending. Now, I understand that it works for the cinematic romanticism of the movie; the whole Leo Tolstoy/"Anna Karenina" thing, not to mention that the titular shoes, as in the Hans Christian Andersen story, have the power to destroy.



                                 But suicide over being unable to choose between Boris and dance, and Julian Krastner?  Oh, my God!  Of course, I would dance for Anton Walbrook, because Krastner, as played by Marius Goring in the film, is such a wuss, I would dance away from him as soon as possible.  This is my personal fallacy with the film, but it does not stop me from enjoying it.  And when Moira ascends those stairs...girls, I am telling you, if that happens, we had all better wear our special capes.



                                   Mine would be red.  Just like the shoes.

A Sad, Premature Farewell To Lance Kerwin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                       Most of us will remember Lance as he looked on the left.  This picture on the right, showing how he looked in present times, does not speak well.  He died on January 24, and his daughter, Savannah, said she appreciates the outpouring from fans and friends.



                         But the cause of death was not revealed.  Looking at that older picture, it suggests to me only two possibilities--drugs or suicide.  Which is why people want to know the cause of death.  Especially in someone who epitomized youth, but sure did not maintain it.  Indications are he had a hard adult life.


                         I would like to focus more on the Lance most on here remember.  For us oldsters, he gave us a chance to reflect back on our adolescence in "James At 15," while navigating it those facing the traumas of that life period.  And I remember, after the episode where James loses his virginity--to a woman, of course; this was prime-time TV in the Seventies, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!--it became "James At 16."


                        Now that he is gone, I would love to see the TV adaptation of  " 'Salem's Lot."  I may just look at up on You Tube.


                       But the performance I best remember him for is in the 1976 autobiographical drama "The Loneliest Runner."  It was based on the abusive childhood and adolescence of actor Michael Landon, and while the names were changed, the incidents were real.   Kerwin was impressive in the running scenes, which he did at 16, but the chilling performance of De Ann Mears as his mother, and their scenes, made the film almost horrific because of what was done to this poor child.  Did anyone here get an Emmy?  All three--Lance, De Ann, and Brian Keith as the father--gave Emmy caliber performances.


                         So, it is with great sadness that my girls and I say farewell to Lance Kerwin, a gifted talent who left this world far too soon.  But the work will live on.


                            Rest In Peace, Lance!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Birthday, Celia Keenan-Bolger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                                What a great way to start the day, by wishing a Happy Birthday to one of my favorite actresses, Celia Keenan-Bolger.  She turns 45 today, and who would believe it? I mean she still looks fresh enough to do those ingenue roles, and I have no doubt she will do something big in the future.



                                  As to what Celia is doing now, well, Celia, dear, we really have to have lunch or tea, so I can inform my girls just what is going on.



                                    Wouldn't it be interesting to see Celia take on the Nancy Kelly role in "The Bad Seed?"  I wonder how much hysteria she could muster up.  It would be fascinating to see.  Or how about Miss Lucretia Collins in Tennessee Williams' one-act "Portrait Of A Madonna?"  Maybe even Stella in "A Streetcar Named Desire?"  No one has played that role correctly since Kim Hunter.  Celia could break that record.



                                      So, Happy Birthday, Celia.  Have fun on your day, and best wishes for the forthcoming year!


                                       But I am telling, you, darling, folks want to see you back on the stage!




Wednesday, January 25, 2023

Darlings, Who Would Have Thought A Problematic Show Could Make One Feel So Good?????????????



                           We saw this show two weeks ago Sunday, as David's birthday present.  It was a wonderful choice.  And it is playing at the Booth Theatre.  The problematics of the show are its being about a girl, Kimberly, who has so much going against her.  First, she was born with the disease progeria, where the body ages faster than normal.   Imagine going through puberty at eight.  And menopause at ten.  The life expectancy for one with the disease is sixteen years (Remember the "Sleeping Beauty" fairy tale?  Her life was limited to sixteen by the evil fairy.  A coincidence, or not?)



                                Highly unlikely because the creative team is David Lindsay-Abaire, and Jeannine Tesori.  He wrote the book and lyrics, she the music.  Which she did with "Fun Home" which this show begs comparison with.   I found this more hopeful, but there are no signature songs, as there were in "Fun Home."  There is nothing to match Sydney: Lucas ' heartrending "Ring Of Keys," or Judy Kuhn's dramatic "Days And Days."  Victoria Clark, throughout 'Kimberly' gives a haunting performance that at times breaks the heart but lifts the spirits.  She is aided and abetted by her dysfunctional family.  Steven Boyer and Ali Mauzey play the parents, a pair of childish narcissists, with Boyer's character also an alcoholic.
Almost stealing the show is Bonnie Milligan as Debra, Patti's grifter con-artist sister, who, in an odd way, encourages Kimberly in ways that her parents are unable to.  When Bonnie lets loose her voice in song, it almost steals the show.


                                A lot goes on here, not to mention the show is set in Bergen County, New Jersey.  While I did not grow up there, I certainly knew it, so I got a kick when all these Jersey towns, like Lodi, are referenced, and I knew them all!  New Jersey could also be one reason why Kimberly wants adventure, because, well, it is New Jersey, and I gather the family does not live in the high-end section of Bergen County.  A girl just HAS to escape.


                                The ensemble cast, and their performances, reminded me of 1978's "Runaways," how adolescence is such a frustrating period, because one wants to flee, but being a minor, can't.


                                   Jessica Stone and Danny Mefford are director and choreographer, and their work is both moving and inspiring.  I loved the last moments of "Kimberly Akimbo."  They almost made me want to be sixteen all over again.


                                    But not quite.

Saturday, January 21, 2023

Darlings, This Poster Made Me Want To See This 1963 Film, As A Child!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                                       If you thought my parents would let me see this film, after looking at this poster, you are correct--they would not!  I wanted this poster emblazoned on my bedroom wall, but they would not allow that, either.  Now, thanks to "Svengoolie" I, at last, get to see Hammer's 1963 "Kiss Of The Vampire."



                                      However, girls, I have a feeling the poster may be better than the film.  But, with the lush Hammer color photography, toothsome bosomy barefoot beauties, and blood galore, the film should offer up some campy fun.  I cannot wait, so be there, at 8PM tonight. along with David, Baby Gojira, Pippin, and Kerwyn, and our beloved Cucumbo for this potential delight.  But I wouldn't dare drink tomato juice, during it!



                                                                                   


                       As for "Sventoonie," well, after last week's experiment, I think he has learned his lesson, because this week he is going to deconstruct Roger Corman's color 1965 sci-fi film, "Voyage To The Prehistoric Planet."  Now, let's get one thing straight.  The creature seen in the lower left-hand corner of this poster is NOT Gojira.  He would never appear in a cheesy film like this; why, the dinosaurs will not even be real; probably microscope slide enlarged lizards!!!!!!!!!!  Gojira would have nothing to do with this trash, but he is delighted to watch it, and laugh it up, with the rest of us.



                     So, join in the fun tonight, at 10:30PM.  Remember, "Svengoolie" now runs an extra half hour, so get the time frame right!



                      Vampires and dinosaurs!  What a delightfully horrific combination!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                       

Friday, January 20, 2023

Claude Rains Was Great, As Always, In "The Invisible Man!" But Frank Sinatra? That's Another Story!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                            Girls, I promise I will get to Frankie in a minute, but first I must sing the praises of the 1933 "The Invisible Man."



                              I had forgotten it was directed by James Whale.  The opening shot, where he is walking through the snow, is worthy of "Wuthering Heights."  The H.G. Wells Man vs. God trope was superbly done, livened by Rains' vocal performance, and a spectacular turn by veteran Una O'Connor, whose hysterics were hilarious.  If you think this is all she is good for, check out her understated work in John Ford's 1935 "The Informer," or as Mrs. Gummidge in Selznick's "David Copperfield," released that same year.



                              Once more, this gem still holds up.  And on its 90th anniversary, yet.



                            As for Svengoolie--

                            Frank Sinatra?  "The Man With The Golden Arm?"  Are you kidding?



                           This was always known as an A-list 1955 film.  Besides Sinatra, who earned a Best Actor Oscar nomination, the cast includes Darren McGavin, Kim Novak, and Eleanor Parker, who, as the wife, turns in the most hilarious performance in the film, on a par with Judith Evelyn in "The Tingler," four years later.



                             Which got me thinking.  The more the footage was watched, the campier it seemed.  At first, I thought "Sventoonie" was going to deconstruct 1936's "Reefer Madness," which would have been a hoot.  Then I got to thinking maybe to today's audiences 'Arm' might seem as campy as "Reefer Madness," and I think this is what "Sventoonie" was trying to show.  It finally kicked in with me, and I went with it, but I would still like to see this film in its entirety.



                                 But, for "Sventoonie" to spring such a surprise!  Darling, be careful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                                   Or else we won't know what to wear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, Everyone Should Have On Their Wall A Jasper Johns!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                          He is still alive, in his nineties, and the colors and texture of the above, and the way they blend together, even though most could distinguish what this is makes it a must for wall hanging.  It is, of course the United States, and if it were this colorful, I think it would be a United States we would all want to live in.  Alas.



                          If that isn't enough to convince one, you know who has one on their wall?  ANNA?  That is right, Anna Wintour, who dictates taste in this town!  We wouldn't want to be considered out of taste, would we, darlings????????????????



                            It doesn't have to be an original. Even if it is a copy hanging on your wall, it is still Jasper Johns.



                           Better clear a wall at once, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, January 19, 2023

Girls, Who Knew Betty Smith Wrote A Play??????????????



                            Anyone who has never read the novel "A Tree Grows In Brooklyn" should.  And whether one has or hasn't, I recommend the 1945 Elia Kazan directed movie (his first), which won a Best Supporting Actor Oscar for James Dunn, and his portrayal of father Johnny Nolan, as well as a Special Juvenile Oscar for Peggy Ann Garner's portrayal of Smith's signature creation, Francie Nolan.



                            Oh, my God, the photo above is enough to bring tears to my eyes..   The scene in the
schoolroom, where Francie, about to graduate from eighth grade, sees the note and flowers on the desk that turn out to be from her now deceased father--he asked Aunt Sissy (Joan Blondell) to buy them with money he left to her--and Francie breaks down in Aunt Sissy's arms.  Tears are just welling up in me, darlings, just writing about it.


                             Readers are familiar with Francie Nolan as far as this story is concerned.  But the big surprise is that she actually made an earlier appearance, in a 1930 play, written by Smith, called "Becomes A Woman."  In the play, Francie is nineteen years old, working in the music department at a five-and-dime, in Brooklyn, of course, and living with her parents.  So, Smith actually reversed Francie's trajectory., starting with her in young adulthood, and memorializing her as a child.  Who knew?


                              Well now, under the auspices of The Mint Theater's Off-Broadway Production at New York's City Center, Smith's play, "Becomes A Woman" will be presented for the first time to a New York audience!  It runs from February 7-March 18.


                                 This may not be the event of the season, but for fans of Smith and Francie this should prove to be both interesting and revealing.  I sort of compare this to the publication, several years back, of Harper's Lee's "Go Set A Watchman."  I don't think the play will change fans' minds about how they view Francie or her story, but it is curious to note Smith first envisioned Francie as a young adult.


                                  Because, just as Scout was pretty much Harper Lee, so Francie Nolan was pretty much Betty Smith.


                                  Think about going, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, January 17, 2023

Girls, Who Needs A Gay Bar In Midtown???????????? This Is The Perfect Meeting Spot For Single Theater Queens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                      This past Sunday, David and I ventured into the city to see his birthday present show, "Kimberly Akimbo," with Victoria Clark.  I promise I will do a post on that later this week, as I am still processing the experience.



                          EnRoute to the Booth Theatre, on West 45th Street, we passed The Museum Of Broadway, at 145 West 45th Street, and could not resist stopping by.  We did not go into the museum proper, just the lobby and the gift shops.  And even there, there was action!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                          Girls, I have never seen so many Theater Queens crammed into one space since the first time I saw "Julie and Julia," back in 2009.  The place was crawling with them, like cockroaches.  Although there was one straight couple, who dared to kiss in this place--straights kissing among Theater Queens, can you imagine??????????



                            Yes, the museum is for everyone, but give the poor Theater Queen a chance.  They may own all the shows but are lonely and embittered.  l know, because I have been there, darlings!!!!!!!!!!



                             Unfortunately, they don't serve drinks here; at least as far as I know.  They really should.



                               For single Theater Queens, I am telling you, this is the new meeting place in town!



                              You might meet the love of your life here!  How romantic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                            

I Cannot Believe McDonald's Is Doing It!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                          It was okay when British Airways did it.  That was a class act.  And some other commercial did it, and it was not offensive.



                          But McDonald's???????????????  A sleazy fast-food chain, which I wouldn't even be seen using their bathroom, with the trash that that goes there, plus the food is as trashy and unhealthy as can be imagined.  No wonder America is an obese nation!!!!!!!!!!!!



                           I am not here to talk about that, now.  I am talking about McDonald's latest commercial, where they have the temerity to use composer Delibes' "Flower Duet" from "Lakme."   First, the product is not worthy of such a piece, second, and most important, the audience it is directed at has no idea what the piece even is.  So, why bother?



                              Stick to direct, comprehensible things, like "You deserve a break today."  Remember that?  Now, that befit the product, without being offensive.



                               McDonald's is never going to be sophisticated.  So, why even try?

                             Here is the "Flower Duet" to prove my point!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                               

Eloiise Was Always Famous For Going To The Plaza! But Today, Could She Afford It????????????????



                   Not just Eloise, darlings, but in the late 80's, early 90's--my God, an era ago!!!!!!--I was a habitue at The Palm Court in The Plaza Hotel.  Once a month, I would treat myself to afternoon tea. Back then, the price was $33 a person, which was expensive, but, even on my then tenuous salary, it did not require me to go into debt.  Because I saved for it.



                    Now, David has the week of President's Day off, and we are planning a staycation in NYC. One thing we want to do is afternoon tea.  So, I started looking for places.  My first choice was The Palm Court but listen to this.  A tea for two, minus champagne, is $170 per person.  Can you believe that?  I could do a high tea at home, cheaper than that!!!!!!!!!!  Oh, and if you should want champagne, it is $195 per person.  



                     Can you believe that darlings? Between $340 and $390 for tea?????????  Close to $400? Are you kidding me?  I was looking forward to a Dolly Levi like return--I wonder, if Boris, the waiter who always used to serve me, is still there? --but at these prices I don't think Dolly herself would go there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                     Over intervening years, I have always preferred the Astor Court at The St. Regis Hotel.  Their tea was always reasonable.  It still is, if compared to The Plaza, but can you imagine--now it is $115 per person!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I think the last time we went it was $70 or $75!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                        Is there any place in NYC for afternoon tea that is less than three figures a person?  Because I would like to know.  And please don't tell me Tea And Sympathy, because, while the tea is good, it is a Village tourist trap.  And I firmly believe the words of Gladys Cooper in 1942's "Now, Voyage---" "Please try to remember, Charlotte, that we are NOT commercial travelers.  It is bad enough having to associate with these tourists on board!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"



                          Indeed!  Somewhere in this city, there must be a reasonabe afternoon tea.



                          If only we could find it!  Help me, girls, please!



                          And do not suggest a diner!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do Viewers Now Have To Resort To Underground Screenings??????????????????????

                                            Many years ago, a radio broadcaster made a joke about "Gone With The Wind" being screened that night on the wall of the Lincoln Tunnel!  I remember thinking if I could have been there, I would have.  But that was before Covid, partisanship, and people who should not be dictating to all of us what is or not politically correct--according to them.



                                               Every so often, girls, I check on Google, to see if there are any screenings of "Gone With The Wind" coming up.  To be sure, there are other films I look for, too, but recently on a website called Flashback Cinema, the 1939 film came up.  According to them, at the IPIC Fulton Market Theatre, located at 11 Fulton Street in Manhattan, there are to be screenings of the 1939 classic on Sunday January 22, and Wednesday January 25.  But here is the problem--when I inquired about screenings, I got no answers.  Most importantly, I cannot find the starting times for any of the screenings.  



                                                  I mean, what is this?  A hush hush, like the Underground Railroad, or meetings of the Communist Party back in the days of the Rosenbergs--who were betrayed by the treacherous Greenglasses?  Even when I telephone their number there is no option given for showtimes.  And on the reservations section, GWTW is not listed, so it is not like I can reserve a ticket for us--David and I.



                                                    What the hell is going on here?  "As God is my witness!" Really!!!!!!!!!



                                                      I have a good mind to phone till I get a person, and then say to them, "Get off these steps, you trashy wench! Get off this land!"



                                                       Any suggestions, girls??????????????
 

Friday, January 13, 2023

Happy Friday The 13th, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                               With all the craziness going on in the world, and no place to go anymore, like The Colony Club, I completely forgot that today is Friday, the thirteenth!



                                  At least one comes along every year, but I never expected it to be the very first month.



                                  So, Happy Friday, the thirteenth, to everyone.  As I said in an earlier post, Betsy Palmer brilliantly acted the role of Mrs. Voorhees with her teeth.   Who could forget those immortal words-- "Kill her, Mommy, kill her!  Don't let her get away, Mommy!  Don't let her live!"/I won't Jason, I won't. /Get her, Mommy, get her!  She can't hide!  No place to hide!  Kill her, Mommy! Kill her! / I will, Jason, I WILL!!!!!!!!!"



                                   Ah, a mother's love.  Maybe Friday the thirteenth should be a second kind of Mother's Day!!!!!!!!!!!!



                                 Because being a mother means needing more than one day as a break!



                                 Who wants to end up like Mrs. Voorhees??????????????????


                                   



                                  

Girls, Join Us Tomorrow Night, As "Svengoolie" Offrs A Real Gem--Claude Rains' 1933 "The Invisible Man," Which Turns 90 This Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                                        When Betsy Palmer played Mrs. Voorhees in "Friday The 13th," she acted with her teeth.  Claude Rains, in "The Invisible Man" ( only his second film) went her one better--he acted entirely with his voice.



                                            The ghoulish humor, tragedy, revenge and romance in this story are all played out superbly.  It was at the height of Universal's monster phase, so the production values were of the highest quality--for Universal, that is.



                                             It is always a treat to see this now rarely shown film, so all of us here will be looking forward to it!



                                             However, I cannot reveal what "Sventoonie" is doing, because all I get are references to a robot and watching Frank Sinatra in "The Man With The Golden Arm," which is not a horror movie.  It is anybody's guess what Sventoonie is serving up, but I am sure it will be fun.  And in our house, little Pippin cannot wait to see Blob E. Blob.



                                               So, girls, join us tomorrow evening at 8PM.  Remember, "Svengoolie" runs half an hour longer, so "Sventoonie" does not start till 10:30 PM!  A full evening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                                               Don't miss this Universal gem.  Pertaining to the title character's experiment--Don't try this at home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, January 11, 2023

I Want Answers To These Questions!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                        I don't think I have posted anything on here true crime related since the Gabby Petito case.  But two recent events have made me wonder not just what is wrong with society, but I hope this does not bode ill for the new year.



                         Let us start with the shooting in Newport News, Virginia. On the Friday before January 10--which would be the sixth, not only the Epiphany, but the anniversary of the Capital Insurrection--a six-year-old boy brought a gun to school, and intentionally shot his first-grade teacher, Abigail Zwener, 25.



                         I will start with her.  Thankfully, she should survive, but face it, her career, which was just starting, is over.  I do not expect she will ever face a classroom again, after suffering such a traumatic experience.  I can tell you I wouldn't.



                           The boy in question may be the most heinous child since Robert Thompson and Jon Venables, killers of James Bulger, aged 2, back in Liverpool, on February 17, 1993.  Hey, this marks thirty years.  And Venables, now an adult, is still always in trouble.  So much for the justice system.



                              This kid is not being identified, for his alleged protection.  Why?  If he is capable enough to operate a gun, and score two hits, notice should be taken of this lethal tyke.



                                 Equally as hidden are the child's parents.  Where are they?  Who are they?  Has Child Services gotten involved.  What kind of parents would allow anyone, let alone a six-year-old access to a gun?  How would he even know how to use it?  How many of us, at that age, would be capable?  Not me, I can tell you.  But then, we did not have a gun in our house.



                                    There is talk of charging the parents, and it is about time parents took responsibility for the criminal behavior of their offspring.  But this kid should not get a free ride. At least a juvenile psychiatric facility.



                                       These are the questions I want answered.  And I expect them to be.



                                        Otherwise, the investigators are as much to blame as anyone else.



                                           And that reminds me--

                      Bryan Kohlberger--oh, I have lots of questions about him


                     For those just coming back from vacation, this Ted Bundy wannabe is the charming gentleman who, on November 13, 2022 (just two days before the 64th anniversary of the Clutter killings, immortalized in Truman Capote's masterwork, "In Cold Blood," and I bet he knew it) murdered Maddie Morgan, 21, Kaylee Goncalves, 21, Xana Kernodle, 22, and Ethan Chapin, 20.


                        It was pretty grisly.  The victims were allegedly stabbed while asleep in their off-campus housing, near Moscow, and all were students at the University Of Idaho.  How come no one heard anything, except the survivor?  And why was she spared?  



                         I have no doubt of his motive--serial killer fame.  His persona and background are very similar to Ted Bundy.  Bryan Kohberger is highly educated, a Ph.D. student at Washington State University.  But he is from a wealthy family in a wealthy locale--Chestunut Hill, PA.  Remember that town in the "Cold Case" episode "The Sleepover?"  So, take that into consideration. Bet the parents will pull a Brian Laundrie with him.  There is already a story out there about his father picking him up in Idaho and driving him away.  What the hell is going on?



                            Look at those eyes.  Cold.  He meant to do this.  But why these four?  Therre must be a connection somewhere, and I want to know it.  Once that is found, more insight into his selection of these students will reveal more.



                              Bryan Kohberger is the embodiment of Richard Loeb, the more dangerous the Leopold-Loeb team, back in the twenties.  He wanted to commit the perfect murder, and he chose these victims and this location.  But why?



                                 And how about his family background.  What kind of parents raised such an entitled monster?   His Chestnut Hill background just reeks of entitlement.  But then, what is a Chestnut Hill student, of supposed intelligence, doing at a non-Ivy League school?  It's not like he can't afford it.



                                 Much has been made of his sister, Amanda having been in a 2011 independent horror film, a slasher called "Two Days Back."  But does it really matter?



                                   The public should be informed of Bryan Kohlberger, who, had he not been caught, would have killed again.  Prison inmates should watch out for him.



                                   This criminal makes me sick.  But legal officials botching this case, which I so fear, in which case Bryan walks, angers me.



                                  By the way, I have a cousin named Brian.  And he is NOT a serial killer.



This Is What I Want!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                             My first doctor visit of 2023 was to the eye doctor, and David and I had this discussion that I need a new prescription.  I have more of a problem with distance than up close--I am now writing this post without my glasses, darlings--and I have been reading without glasses for the better part of a year.  I have not done this since third grade.  I am told my paternal grandmother's eyes changed in this way, so I guess maybe it is something I inherited.



                               Now, girls, if one is getting a new prescription, we have to talk about fashion here, In with the new, out with the old.  What I want is a pair of glasses like those shone above.  I have seen people wearing such, but where in the hell am I supposed to get them?  I mean, you know?



                                I am The Raving Queen, so it is time to bring out the flambe when I walk into the room.  Not that it isn't already there, girls, but this will give things an added boost.  Maybe I can finally have lunch with ANNA.



                                 And think how they will go with me watching a screening of "Blue Velvet!"

Tuesday, January 10, 2023

These Are White Trash Candy Bars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



                                I recently re-read Tim Murphy's brilliant 2016 novel, "Christodora," about the famed apartment building on East 9th Street that started out as a settlement house, back in the Twenties. The novel is a character study of its inhabitants as they come and go, plus a fascinating glimpse into living in the East Village that, on both readings, made me want to move there.


                                Within the novel, one character refers to another as having "a White Trash sweet tooth."  I asked, what candies would constitute the designation of White Trash--and I came up with these two.


                                     First, these candies are hardly sold where I live, but I bet they are popular in the South, with MAGA and Proud Boys, who don't give a damn about their teeth, and I am sure these would not DARE be seen in such affluent areas as the Garden District of New Orleans.


                                       I have never had a Charleston Chew, and the way the package emphasizes the artificiality of the vanilla flavor tells me it is cheap junk.


                                       As for Sky Bar, they tried a tempting ad campaign when I was young, emphasizing the four different flavors in the candy bar.  They were caramel crunch, peanut topping, chocolate fudge, and vanilla chew.  Well, let me tell you, I tried one once.  The caramel crunch and peanut topping were forgettable, but the chocolate fudge and vanilla chew were memorable for all the wrong reasons.  The gooey chocolate was so fake tasting, it left a bad taste behind. As for the vanilla chew, not to be gross, but it tasted like sugar flavored semen!!!!!!!!!!!  That is right, girls!  Avoid it!


                                          I did, and I have.  But they have an online presence, and in some social corners, shall we say, they are popular.  Especially with White Trash parents, who do not care about their children's teeth--or buy them this junk when they would be better off saving up for a trip to the dentist!  But they are cash cows for the dental industry!


                                            I certainly love candy. But of high quality, not this garbage.


                                            Bring back Helen Elliott!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!