Darlings, I hope This Is Not Farewell, But Let Me Say A Few Words Anyway!!!!!

Well, girls, as I have been hinting at for several weeks, I am to undergo a colonoscopy on Tuesday. Not that I have not had one before--I have!--but I blocked it out as soon as it was done, and have not had one for seven years due both to the prep and that I had no one in that time to go with me.

I think this second one is harder than the first, because the first one was at least a novel experience. I had no real idea--UNTIL--how awful the stuff to drink is, and the fact that I now know makes me even more frightened. Not to mention I have my lovely Monsieur, who is the main reason I am doing it, and who will accompany me screaming to the doctor's office. Oh, if only I had not been so out loud about my resolution for the Year, I would not be in this mess. Added to this, it comes on the cusp of the year anniversary (this Friday, the 11th) of my friend of many years, David Semonin. Now, he went through this every year, and it still got him, but he had Crohn's disease and may have had genetic factor influences. His eldest brother, Paul, is the family's soul survivor!!!!!!

So I have to stay alone in the house and drink this crap. I don't mind the defecating; I have done worse, with food poisoning, but my anxiety level has been so high for weeks, I wonder if my blood pressure is OK enough to do this??????

But let us get back to the word "hope" in the subject bar. Rue McClanahan ends her autobiography on a note of hope, with the final sentence, "I still have it." Wise lady, Rue!!!!! Help me, Rue!!!! Get Meryl on the phone!!!!!!

So let me say to each and every one of my girls that I love you all. And my father, sister, and of course, Monsieur. And let me share a few thing s I have learned along the way, for you to take with you.

I have learned that sometimes the things we think we want (like National Honor Society) that will make a difference, in actuality really won't. I have learned that something you REALLY want (like a Monsieur) is worth waiting for, and believing in; that is, never truly doubting (even after a lot of crap) that one will come along. I have learned, as I said earlier, that the ones you think have it all, really don't. And I have learned that what you DO have is something to be grateful for, every single day!!!!!!!

OK, girls?????? Do you think you would get THIS from "Joan and Melissa????"
Now, everyone here knows "The Wizard Of Oz" is my all-time favorite movie!!!! If I was truly negative, I would picture this post with the END title for that film. Instead I want that hope Rue spoke of, so I am going to post the OPENING title.

It is a lot more hopeful. And for Divine Inspiration (no, no t the late Drag artist!!!!) we are going to watch "The Song Of Bernadette" today, so I have to get Monsieur prepared for THAT!!!!!

I still have plans for the future. I want to contact Deborah Winters Chaney at her Texas based realty firm, about her having played--oh, my God!--Maxie, in "The People Next Door!" I am tellin g you, she was SO devastating!!!!!!! Iwant to do a reading with my players group of 'People," with me as Maxie, in a Peggy Lipton style wig, and maybe bring it before an audience, incorporating both the TV and film scripts. I want to continue reaching out to my girls, and finish that short story based on my disturbed, sexually repressed coworker. I want to continue loving Monsieur, which is the main reason I am putting myself through this Hell.

So this is the last you will hear from me, until Wednesday!!! Pray you hearm, darlings!!!! Reach out, abnd touch someone!!!!! Reach out, and touch a mezzuza for me!!!!!!!!

MERYL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!