A Gay/campy chronicling of daily life in NYC,with individual kernels of human truth. copyright 2011 by The Raving Queen
Saturday, January 24, 2015
Were Paul Cox's Parents Responsible For What He Did????????????? Absolutely!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Paul Cox, a native of Larchmont, New York,--a place I wanted to live at at one time, because there resided, next to each other, The Kerrs (Walter, the drama critic, and Jean, the author of "Please Don't Eat The Daisies," among others, and the Killileas, whose matriarch, Marie, wrote two books about her disabled child overcoming adversity, "Karen!" and "With Love, From Karen!"--was a troubled soul, who had the disadvantage of growing up in a self-righteous, Right Wing, Irish Catholic family. This meant there was not much hope for him. First, among this tribe, is there any other kind, than self-righteous and Right Wing? And second, the Coxes had six other children, so a troubled soul could not be bothered with, let alone helped, when a couple, as this one was, was trying to ascend the social scale of Larchmont!!!!!!!!!!!!!
As a result, they could not be bothered about Paul's troubles in school; they thought, he was just a difficult, unruly kid. What is interesting was, as things got worse, and the drinking started at thirteen, when his parents finally took him to a psychiatrist, he was diagnosed with a learning disability that had gone unnoticed, but, had it, might have enabled Paul to overcome his deficiencies in school, found a niche, and achieved success. But he did not, and the ones he saw responsible, and held mounting resentment for this, were his parents.
Had Paul murdered them, I would have found the whole thing more understandable. But he did not, and the Coxes had better realize how lucky they are, because it is without question they were the intended target.
When Paul had been born, his parents had been living on a less tony street in Larchmont. There is evidence that he was a happy child there. When he was older, they moved to a more upscale region, near the water, and he was not happy leaving that house. Which makes what happened have an odd kind of synchronicity.
On the night of December 31, 1988, going into January 1, 1989, Paul and his friends were out binge drinking. Paul got so drunk he smashed a car into a road handle, and then walked away in a stupor. While he was in this state, he walked home, and, not fully realizing what he was doing (but realizing to some extent) walked, not to the home, where he lived, but to his former childhood home, on Lincoln Street. Currently, there resided an Indian family, The Chervus, a husband and wife couple, both of whom were doctors. Several years before, when Paul was an innocent looking teen, he went to his childhood home and asked Mrs. Chervu if he could have another look at the place he'd been born and raised in. She coldly refused. The bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Because he was in such an alcoholic blackout, on the night in question he went into what he must have thought at the time was his childhood home, so the couple that he slew he in rage he thought were his parents. Only they weren't. Too bad, in a way.
The case went unsolved in years, till Cox joined AA and began sobering out. He began having nightmares and flashbacks to this incident, whereupon he realized that he was responsible. But, instead of turning himself in, he shared this at a meeting, not knowing what to do. Someone in the group went to the police and told them. Now, I know this is a controversial act, considering the question of anonymity in the 12 step group community, but I don't care--if someone openly confesses to a murder or rape or molestation, someone in that group should have enough moral conscience to tell. I certainly would, and I applaud the person in Cox's group who did.
So, now, the scum is behind bars for two twenty five year terms. That is pretty much the rest of his life, so he is off the street. As for his parents, they stood by him, realizing he is sick, and is where he belongs.
Too bad they did not get him the help he needed when young. They might have avoided all this, and the Chervus might still be alive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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44 comments:
If there is no hope for the children of right wing Christian couples why aren't they all murderers? Cracks me up that u fight against discrimination for gays but heap it on others...a tad ironic.
Listen, hon, these are the very folk who
discriminate against gays. I know, because I was
raised among such types.
Right, not all chidren of rightist couples
are murderers, if they are bright enough to learn
how to think for themselves, rather than conform
to what they were taught. That is what I did.
Why can't the others?
He wasn't locked away for life...you do know what concurrent vs. consecutive means, right? He was released in March of this year.
Don't worry, dear! He will do something again,
which will send him right back. Trash never changes!
Paul Cox has been released.
Give him time, darling; he will be back!
"Because he was in such an alcoholic blackout, on the night in question he went into what he must have thought at the time was his childhood home, so the couple that he slew he in rage he thought were his parents. Only they weren't. Too bad, in a way."
It sounds like you were rooting for the death of his parents. You know, those gosh awful Right-Wing Catholics.
I am a Right-Wing Catholic. I have raised a daughter who had a learning disability. She is now attending University, has a managerial position at her place of employment, and is running her own business on the side. All this after 13 yrs of Catholic school, nine of them in plaid.
It also sounds like you're rooting for him to commit another crime so he'll wind back in jail again. You refer to him as "trash" and "scum". That is hate speech. The same thing of which you're accusing Right-Wing Catholics.
And not all of us are against the LGBT community! I've had great friendships with gay men, including my neighbor & his partner who have lived right across the street. He is a wonderful guy with a lively personality & lots of fun to be around. I was happy for him that he finally found the right partner who he had so much in common with & who made him so very happy.
I'd also taken my daughter to Pride when she was in middle school. I wanted her to encourage her to be accepting of ALL people from all walks of life. I wanted her to have the opportunity to learn about other cultures & lifestyles. I wanted her to grow up with compassion for others, because we're all humans after all. And we all are someone's daughter or son, mother or father, partner or friend, etc. We all should be treated with kindness and with respect.
It disappoints me that liberals pride themselves on being awesomely good people & supportive of others, are the very ones who preach hate the loudest & most often. Need proof? Read your very own words herein above.
Not all Right-Wing folks are bad. Not all Catholics are bad. By implication, I'm sorry you were displeased having had a Right-Wing upbringing. But disliking all Conservatives across the board makes you no better of a person than all Conservatives you have accused before even giving them half a chance.
I hope you will soften your heart, get to know someone before already making assumptions about their character. There are far more of us kind & compassionate Conservatives than I believe you anticipate. And that's a good thing!
Peace be with you. ~H
H--
You are right when you say we are all someone's sons or daughter. You are also right when you say I was displeased with my Right Wing upbringing.
I am not displeased about being Catholic. I, however did not like the Right Wing approach relatives forced down me. I learned to think independently.
Admittedly, I have my isssues. and some of them pop out, like horned toads, when I wax on serious topics.
It is never my intention to personally disparage anyone. If the material offends, you have my appology. Nor do I consider myself a hatemonger.
I just have my opinions, which come from my own expereice.
I wish you peace and joy during this Holiday Season, and in 2016!
Great response! I love it when someone can accept constructive criticism and respond with grace. You go, Honey!
Thank you, Shanna! I may be a Raving Queen,
but I try to be honest, and own up when necessary.
Please feel free to drop in on here, anytime!
People are responsible for their OWN actions...I know what it's like to experience, "dude, where's my car?"...but, I never stabbed anyone to death. This dude just lost self control...nobody knows why he did what he did...I highly doubt it had anything to do with mommy or daddy spanking him or making him feel like he wasn't "special". It was no one's fault but his own. Now, since the MURDERER is out and about...I'm sure he'll change his name. Good luck to anyone that encounters him drunk...and they remind him of a "bully @ school that thumped his ear..."...poor soul...they'll wind up dead and he'll do a year in prison.
Now, hon you are right about the
danger of him being out on the street--
I agree!--but charity is not the only
thing that begins at home, either!
I dont think this man is a bad person and i know he will never be back in jail.you are not a nice person.
What the heck your not a queen of nothing .only women could be a queen.
Jackie, dear,
Your decisions are your own; if you want to advocate for a criminal,
fine. But, darling, havn'e you heard of the
wor queen in a gay context? Or seen what it says
on my home page?
Theree is more than one way to be a queen, hon!!!!!!!!!!
Saw this on an episode of Unraveled on ID. The sense of entitlement alone , sans the gruesome slayings) given to this white male privelage was sum sick shit.
My dear queen, don't take any shit from these hypocrites. They jus mad cause you kept it real; though they obviously cant handle the realness-- fuck em gurl. Pay no mind to these preposterously PC. Nobody cares about their unrealistic, amateur ideations. Thats why they only open their mouths to get ignorant on the internet, but wholly unqualified to seek formal education in the judicial system, the forensic or mental health arts; making their opinions worthless.
If these butthurt commenters that arent willing to let paul cox rent a room in their house to help "rehabilitate" him or help get him a job need to shut the fuck up already. Nobody wants a boozy, unhinged killer at large. Screw them for their lack of common sense.
¡casa cerrada!
Saw this on an episode of Unraveled on ID. The sense of entitlement alone , sans the gruesome slayings) given to this white male privelage was sum sick shit.
My dear queen, don't take any shit from these hypocrites. They jus mad cause you kept it real; though they obviously cant handle the realness-- fuck em gurl. Pay no mind to these preposterously PC. Nobody cares about their unrealistic, amateur ideations. Thats why they only open their mouths to get ignorant on the internet, but wholly unqualified to seek formal education in the judicial system, the forensic or mental health arts; making their opinions worthless.
If these butthurt commenters that arent willing to let paul cox rent a room in their house to help "rehabilitate" him or help get him a job need to shut the fuck up already. Nobody wants a boozy, unhinged killer at large. Screw them for their lack of common sense.
¡casa cerrada!
Thank you for your support. Yes, he was sick!
As for the commentators, what's interesting is that the
nuttiest ones come from the ID'ers. Yours is one the
few sane ones. I can agree to disagree, but sometimes
they attack like I am an offender.
I find it all very interesting.
Drop in on here anytime!
This animal should NOT be out on the streets! He brutality murdered two people. I just finished watching the episode on unraveled and I seriously can't believe this garbage is free! There are people who have spent more time on prison over weed possession or fraud.
You are right about that last statement. What's
most disturbing is what it says about our justice
system!
I just watched this episode on "Unraveled" and I was shocked! So I decided to read the transcript from his second trial. I came out with the same view as the jurors -Manslaughter seemed the appropriate outcome. After all, he was/is guilty (and he admitted that and never tried to fleece anyone in regards to his actions). Everyone knew he was guilty...it was just a matter of deciding what price he should pay, where he'd pay it and for how long. The jury decided that he was responsible and didn't find him "guilty by reason of insanity" (which could have seen him serving out his time in a mental facility rather than a maximum security prison). Ultimately, he was found GUILTY and made to pay the price by serving out the appropriate sentence handed down by the judge. When the judges decides on a sentencing amount, they know good and well that whatever they decide will actually end up being cut in half due to prison overcrowding and early parole opportunities. So, when he said 25 years, he knew it'd be closer to 12-15 years, in reality.
In my humble opinion, I did sense some remorse while reading his testimony and during his sentencing trial. I think the judge did too - or else he could have made him serve both sentences back to back instead of concurrently.
Now that he's served his time for his crimes, he's free now to live the remainder of his life to either prove to the world that he's a remorseful man or to prove otherwise. But I'm hopeful that he'll live what's left of his life doing no harm!! I'm most certainly NOT cheering him on to screw up again and cause the death of more innocent lives!! And I'm hoping that your article is just you venting and not seriously wanting him to prove you right by screwing up again (like you've said over and over "just you wait and see" kinds of comments ☹️) I for one hope we never hear of him again for the rest of his life!! May he prove all his critics wrong so that there's no further lives lost by his hands!!
Thanks for the chance to voice my opinion without judgement ��
April,
You are welcome to vent on here anytime, without being judged.
You are correct, my post was a lot of venting. It is not so
much that I am cheering him on to screw up, as you say, because
that would hurt other, innocent people, but that I feel that he
will do so is inevitable. and don't forget I hold the parents
culpable as well.
Thans for sharing!
Super old comment I just saw a rerun of this last night on ID. I did believe it was harsh that the Doctor didn't let Cox in his old house,but you have to take in consideration she was protecting her home, for all she knew Cox could have been a mini thief, or sent by robbers to check out the possessions in the house. She was smart
Alba,
To a point, I suppose
you are right. I guess I
was thinking of the time
the owners of my childhood
home allowed me a nostalgic
tour. On the other hand,
they did know who I was,
as I did them.
i agree on some of your points, however I know many people who had a much worse childhood than this guy. although the parents are completely out of touch and were too "busy" to really see what was right in front of them.....i don't think that's an excuse. he may have had a different target in mind but either way he had a target. I'm a little upset that he's free when there are others in JAIL who deserve their freedom much more compared to his crime. I really hope he does not hurt anyone else but I'm sorry to say that I doubt his demons are behind him. 70% of the time jail only makes offenders worse. to be honest I think he would've been better off in a psy ward these last 20years..because it's obvious he needs help.
btw ikm just curious....whats your opinion on the Gary plauche case? I know it's old, but I'm just curious if you have a similar view as me.
happy holidayss!
I agree with you; his childhood
was not as bad as others. His parents
ignorance or narcissism caused more
of the problem. Why do people like
these have children? When they are
not fit to raise them.
I looked up the Gary Plauche case.
I get it. If it were my child, I would
feel like doing the same thing. I am not
sure I would. And I offer up some personal
info on here. At 15, I was molested by
a neighbor on the street. My greatest fear
--remember my age--was that my classmates
would find out, and bully me for it.
I hated the guy, but I never felt like killing
him.
I would call what Plauche did justifiable homicide.
He was protecting and trying to ease his child's
trauma.
I was six months sober, doing well, doing my steps with my sponsor, going to a dozen meetings a week when a fellow alcoholic started showing up at most of the meetings I went to. He was utterly hateful - his racist and sexist rants were vile. So offensive that a number of people would leave the meeting because they couldn't stomach it. Hey man, I embrace the theory - tolerance, anonymity, freedom of speech ... But when that son of a bitch started detailing the horrific things he was going to do to a young female co-worker, and NOBODY said anything?? I blew UP. I waited till he ended his share, raised my hand and announced that I was headed for the cop shop to maybe save this chic's life, and apologized for cross-talking as I left.
Later, I was set straight by several "old-timers"; I was told I had no business compromising the anonymity thing. Maybe I didn't. Worse thing though, was that the cops laughed me right out of the precinct - I overheard them chortling something about "friggin' drunks ..." I tracked down the girl and warned her. I encouraged her to go to her boss, her boyfriend, her dad or a self-defense class. I also cornered the vile smirking idiot the very next time I saw him and told him I was watching him and he oughta watch his back (I'm a 5'2" 105 lb girl.)
Moral of the story for myself is, keep your mouth shut if you want to keep a secret. Shout out loud if you feel you're "doing the next right thing."
Well, let me just say--
I think you were right dong what you did.
Hearing someone talk like this would bother me,
especially if I did nothing about it.
The only thing I would have done differently was
to have not said anything at the meeting.
I am sorry those cops laughed at you, Stupid.
What, they don't think 12 steppers have any sense?
BTW, good luck on your sobriety. I have been
down the 12 step path, for altogether different
reasons, and now am doing just fine!
Cute screen name--empatheticpixie! Love it!
XO
IT is insane how many times this silly blogger embarrassed himself and dug himself a deeper and deeper hole. Then again, he writes a blog. So, not much to expect from him.
T.P.H.,
You're the one who is
embaarassing yourself,
Captain Marvel. Now,
go back to your basement.
I hear Mommy calling!
You obviously still need education
Dude...have a little faith.
You call yourself a Catholic
If you think his parents were responsible, why do you bash him so much?
Just watched "Unraveled" episode on Justice tv about the Cox case. Does anyone buy this story?
Unknown,
Go away from me please, little boy!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jeffrey,
Have never the program "Justice." How
did they handle it?
Wanna be
No where near you...thank God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There seems to be ALOT of hate in your heart. I'll pray for you.
Hate? No. More like resentment...
which pops out sometimes! But
thanks for the prayers, they
are always welcome.
No he will not.
Are you insane?
Kasimir,
Absolutely not, darling! Are you?
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