Not Much To Learn From Lauren This Time, Girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                           Darlings, I have been derelict in my duties!  It has been so long since I read this--over a month ago--that I just yesterday realized I had forgotten to post anything about this. Which is kind of a subconscious way of saying how I liked the book, which, frankly, was NOT Lauren's finest hour.  I had rather it was about MY last night at Chateau Marmont, darlings--which would have been FANTASTIC, believe me!!!!!!!--except I have never stayed there.  Another thing on my list of things to accomplish, like Classical Languages and Advanced Math!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             Even though the famous, landmark Los Angeles hotel--the ONLY place to stay  when you are in that area, darlings!!!!!--figures in the title, very little time is spent there.  Most of the time is taken up in New York, with one Brooke Alter, (maiden name Greene) and how her relationship escalates from introductions, to her supporting hubby Julien Alter before and during marriage,  while he achieves his goal of becoming a rock singer, to him achieving that goal, and the consequences thereof.  I am sorry to say it is really ho hum.  For one thing,
the only thing I learned her was the importance of using a good night cream every night before bed!  That was it!  The other thing is that Lauren can be a bit of her moralist in her books, which is fine, with me, but her
heroines are usually  empowered.  Girls, if you plan to read the book, stop here, if not I will save you the trouble. Because, when it comes right down to it, instead of walking out on schmuck Julien, who is SO taken up with his own fame, Lauren has them get back together.  I can't endorse that!  And I liked Brooke--up till then!  I never had any use for Julien!

                                            Nor had I any use for the rock world! While Lauren has evidently done her research carefully, I did not give a shit.  I would much rather she write about the New York party, theatrical, or literary scene. You know, where I might turn up as one of her characters.  But hanging out in rock bars?????  Going to ear splitting concerts?????????? Not on your life, sweetheart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             So, this is not up to Lauren at her best!!!!!!!!. And yet, I am glad I read it!  What is interesting is, I read this after reading her latest "Revenge Wears Prada--The Devil Returns," so I know Lauren is back on track.

                                              Perhaps it was an experiment she tried. Oh, well, it didn't work!!!!!!!!!!!

                                              And there definitely were not enough lifestyle tips!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Poor Patrick, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 This is real life, girls!!!!!!!!!  I am telling you, you cannot make this shit up!!!!!!!!!!

                                 Patrick, the Gorilla, has been a resident of the Dallas Zoo for the past eighteen years.  He just adores his public--men, women, and children.  But, he is accused of being sexist, and is being sent to a zoo in South Carolina, where he will have his own, solitary, space, because he does not get along with the female gorillas. He has hit them, and bit them.  There was a report he was going to undergo therapy, but that has been debunked!

                                  The first thing I want to say is, why lay all the blame on Patrick???? He is sweet and lovable to humans, like Magilla Gorilla! I KNOW some of you out there remember him, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                    Maybe, just maybe, those female gorillas were nasty to Patrick!  And maybe he got fed up!  If human women and little girls love him, and he them, then I place the blame on the female gorillas!!!!!!!!!!  Maybe they want to throw Patrick out to make an all female enclave!  Maybe some of those gorillas are lesbian!  In which case, they'd do better having tea with Christine Quinn.  They could give her fashion tips!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                        I hope Patrick is not going to be too lonely in his new surroundings.  It almost makes me want to visit the South Carolina zoo, to see if he is OK!  Maybe he just wants to be Top Ape!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         I wish Patrick happiness. And, I am telling you, if those femme gorillas had not done something to him first, he would not have hit or bit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         Maybe Patrick needs to explore an alternate side, and visit a gay bar!!!!!!!

                                         He is hotter looking than some of the stuff walking in there today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   

Welcome Tovah, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                              Need I forget that tonight is the evening Tovah Feldshuh--"We love you, Tovah!"--steps into the role of Berthe in "Pippin," at the Music Box Theatre???????  Which happens to be next door to the Imperial, on West 45th Street, where the original played!!!!!!!!!!

                               With just 37 minutes to go till show time, the Raving Queen and all my girls want to wish Tovah the best!  I cannot wait to come and see her in this role!  A Tovah  performance is like a blood transfusion--invigorating!

                                  Break a leg, Tovah, darling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gooch Is Gone, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         This is a Black Day in Musical Theater History, girls!  Jane Connell, the one and only Agnes Gooch, since "Mame" opened at the Winter Garden on May 24, 1966, passed away yesterday at the age of 87!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                          Not only did she play Gooch, but who could forget her brilliant turn as Queen Victoria on "Bewtiched?"  Additionally, she taught me, and countless others, to sing "Mame's" opening song, "St. Bridget."  A lot of CD's will be playing that score tonight.  And a lot of my girls out there will be crooning  "St. Bridget."  Including yours truly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                           The theater has lost another Legend Of The Musical Stage.  I would hope the Broadway lights dim for Jane.  She was one of THE consummate musical theater performers.

                                             I did not see "Mame" in its original run, but I count myself among those lucky enough to have seen her, (with Angela Lansbury, and Anne Francine as Vera Charles!!!!!!!!!!!!) in the 1983 revival of "Mame."   Oh, my God!!!!!!!!!!  That was thirty years ago!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  When the Overture died down, and she walked out on stage, Gooch groupies went wild!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             I will always hear her in my head singing Gooch.  I wish I could bring you "St. Bridget, darlings!  I tried. But here is Angela and Company, complete with Jane, doing the classic "We Need A Little Christmas!!!!!!!!"  This should lift your spirits!

                                              Rest In Peace, Jane!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Forget The Musical Of "Bullets Over Broadway!!!!!!!!!" "Boiling Bunnies On Broadway??????" This One Should Be Ignored, Girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                               
                                             Poor Trevor Nunn!  I used to think of him as London's equivalent to Harold Prince, but, in his dotage, he seems to be slipping.  The latest bit of news from the West End is he is going to direct a stage adaptation of--get this, kiddies!!!!!!--the 1987 Michael Douglas, Glenn Close hetero horror howler, "Fatal Attraction!"

                                               Ironic, since the whole thing started in England, with a British short film by James Dearden, called "Deception."  I would still like to see that, girls.  The American film which was made from it, has become so iconic, I cannot see the sense of bringing it to the stage.

                                               Added to which, it already has.  Several summers back, down at CSC, here in Manhattan,  there was a camp adaptation of it, featuring a rather funny Corey Feldman (yes, Corey Feldman!!!!!!!) in the Michael Douglas role!  It basically took the script word for word, and added parody to it!  The role of Ellen, the daughter, was played by a short, muscular armed chorus boy type, and it was staged in the manner of Greek tragedy.

                                                But it was never as funny as it should have been.  And now, with the Brits having a go at it, how will it be done?  Will it still be set in New York, or London?  There are some things, like the desecration of the car, that cannot be done on stage.  How will it end?????????  Will it come to Broadway???? God forbid, though, you know, girls, were it to, you could not keep me away from it!!!!!!!!!

                                                  Not to mention the Nightly Boiling Of The Bunny!!!!!!!!!!!  This I must strongly object to, even if those bunnies are not real!  They had better not be!!!!!!!!!!!  And don't use lobsters, either!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                    This "Fatal Attraction" could be a fatal career move for  all!  But, like I say, darlings, nothing beats watching a theatrical train wreck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I Have Just GOT To Talk To Cherry Jones!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                       And I don't mean about being a lesbian, which I am not, nor playing Amanda in "The Glass Menagerie," which I am seeing Cherry do this coming Sunday, but it has never been on my acting radar.  Come to think of it, according to Cherry, it never was on hers, so I had better watch what I say!

                                       Did you see that recent revealing article in The Times, darlings????????  What caught me was when Cherry mentioned first discovering having seizure disorder--a form of epilepsy--not only during the run of "Doubt," but while she was actually performing it.

                                        This is rather timely for me, who has had epilepsy, petit mal, seizure disorder--call it what you will--for just about all of my 58 years, and now, due to simple economics am faced with going off of what I have been on all my life--Dilantin--to something more generic, called Keppra.  I am doing this
under an accomplished neurologist, whom I trust, but, when I heard Cherry takes something, I had to wonder what she is taking.

                                         Of course, the meds might differ, because my experience has been of longer duration, though I have only one episode on record, when I was about four or five, triggered by an allergic reaction to phenobarbital, (which no one knew at the time) sending me into "status epilepticus," whereupon I awoke, in a hospital, in an oxygen tent, family looking at me, after having (I found out later) been in a coma for two days!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         Fortunately, I have never repeated that, though I do, from time to time get what I call the "funny feeling," which is one of dissociation, that seems to take me outside of myself, until I eventually come back.

                                            None of this, of course, I would  wish on Cherry, or anyone. But I would be interested in hearing how she deals with things in this area!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                              Meanwhile, I will let her deal with playing Amanda!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Look, Monsieur, Where All The Children Plaaaaaaaaay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                        Let's get started right away, girls, because I know the first thing you want to know.

                                       Megan Buzzard is a superb Fantine.  From her entrance during "At The End Of The Day," to when she takes center stage for the classic "I Dreamed A Dream," Miss Buzzard just does not play Fantine; she makes you feel she IS Fantine.  And she makes the audience feel compassion (as I have always felt, since first reading the Hugo novel, before seeing it on Broadway, back in 1987!  The night after it opened on Broadway, darlings!  With the Original Cast!!!!!!!!!!!) for Fantine; her eyes glisten with vulnerability and pain, her facial muscles tighten in agony.  If your primary interest in seeing this show is to see how the actress cast handles Fantine, let me go this far--she comes as close as anyone to my personal
favorite Fantine--the great Britisher, Ruthie Henshall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                        The same goes for Bill Andrews, who inhabits Jean Valjean. There is always a litmus test for me, with the actor playing this role, which tells me whether or not he is going to work.  It is when he gets to the phrase, "My sister's child was close to death, and we were starving," and at that point I
felt a familiar tug at the heart which, coupled with how he held a particular note early on, told me he was going to be just fine.  And he is.  His rendition of "Bring Him Home" soars heavenward, as effortlessly as
though it were a small accomplishment.  But it is not; it is a large one, and Mr. Andrews occupies the stage, and sings the bulk of the score with insight and skill.  His death scene was the only one to move me since
He Who Owns The Role--Mr. Colm Wilkinson. For me, his shining moment was when he approaches the Thernardiers about Cosette, and sings about how he stands in Fantine's place!!!!!!  Damn right!!!!!  Don't miss Mr. Andrews as Jean Valjean!!!!!!!!!!!

                                           Let me say something here about Joesph Bellino's Inspector Javert. Once he is on stage, who the hell is Russell Crowe?  Hell, who was he , anyway?  Well, let's not go there!  When Mr. Bellino was singing "Stars," as the tears poured down my face over the power of the song and the beauty of his voice, I leaned toward my partner, and whispered, "Now, THIS is how the song should be sung!"  He humanizes Javert in a way many do not; I have never been one to agree with his viewpoint, but Mr. Bellino's performance here makes it understandable, and indicates where it came from, and how it evolved.

                                          I am guessing Jacqueline Samaha is somehow related to the director, Jeff Samaha, but let me tell you, darlings, her Eponine stands on its own.  Of course, she handles that character's signature song, "On My Own," with the poignancy demanded, but my favorite Eponine moment has always been when she dies in Marius' arms during "A Little Full Of Rain."  It breaks the heart, and Miss Samaha does just that.  I just loved her Eponine.

                                            Who else?  Well, Sean Kincaid is vocally spectacular as Enjorlas, having one of the strongest voices on that stage.  And his is an impressive presence, which is just another way of saying, girls, that he is hot, recalling Michael McGuire in the Broadway original.  When he took the lead in "Do You Hear The People Sing," I thought the entire audience was going to stand up, and join in.  I know I was ready to, lambs!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             Playing the role of those grifters par excellence, the Thernardiers, Kathy Valentine and John Panepinto achieve the remarkable feat of making them more characters than caricatures, which is why they have often annoyed me in other productions.  They are annoying when need to be here, but not in a way that made me want them to just get off the stage, as has been the case other times.  And I was happy that no one skimped on using my favorite phrase from "Master Of The House"--"Everybody have a glass/Raise it up the Master's ass!!!!!!!" Their delivery of that alone is priceless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             As is Mr. Panepinto when he shows us Thernardier's humanity in the sewer, when he raises his arms upward and utters that plaintive cry--"I raise my eyes to see the heavens. And only the moon looks down!"  These are Thernardiers one does not take for granted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            Now, for Marius and Cosette, played by John Patrick Sabatos and Beata Royzman. .   When, with Jacqueline Samaha, they do the triplet endning of "A Heart Full Of Love,": and their voices soar heavenward as though the angels were carrying them all, it is as achingly beautiful as it should be.  Same when Marius and Cosette duet--they are one pair of two exquisite voices!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             And, of course, I cannot forget, I would never have even been seeing this production, were it not for my theatrical friend, Daniel Burke, who plays the Bishop Of Digne.  A role done by Colm Wilkinson, in the movie, incidentally.  Now, I have done stage work with Danny, so I knew his voice would carry him..  But I had never really seen him act, and when he sings to Valjean, "I have brought your soul for God," it goes to the depths of one's soul.  Not to mention, girls that he is the cutest looking thing seen in a cassock in ages!!!!!!!!!  He'd have made some crazy cleric, but he is a moving Bishop.

                                             One must not forget the children.  Ryan Daniels not only commands the stage as Little Gavroche, his is one of the strongest voices up there.  And so young!  He is wonderful.  As is Abagail Summa as Little Cosette, whose "Castle In The Cloud" is as moving, in its own way, as "I Dreamed A Dream."  It is Little Cosette's version of that song, and Miss Summa delivers!

                                             Jeff Samaha and Kathy Valentine, among others, have guided a cast of 60--that is bigger than the Original Broadway cast of this show; even the 1971 "Follies," which only had a cast of 50!!!!!!!!!!!  The Ensemble is an assemblage of some of the most  gorgeous voices you will ever hear on a stage, and I loved the Understudies' Encore, at the end!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                               In essence, what is on display here is understanding for and an impassioned dedication  to the material.  Something missing from a lot of musical theater across the river, darlings!!!!!!!!
This company is so accomplished, they could be sent there, to Paper Mill,,,,anywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                              If you have never seen the show, this is the production to see.  If it is not one of your faves, this one's professionalism and craftsmanship may win you over.  It has one more weekend round of performances, and, if I had the time, I would go again.  But I am telling my girls to get out to Bay Ridge and see this group bring to life, and help keep memories afresh, the splendors and pleasures of a true Musical Theater Classic.

                                             I began with Fantine, and will end with Fantine.  As one who still wants to play this role, but wouldn't dream of taking it from Miss Buzzard, I have got to say--

                                               Megan, honey, telll them to put some padding on that bed!  Fantine has gone through enough hell by that time!!!!!!!!  Why should she die in discomfort?????????  If ever I step into the part, I would insist on it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!