"If Only You Believe In Miracles," Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                       
                                 The Jefferson Starship had its point; let me tell you, girls!  One of many things the borough of Brooklyn is famous for is its array of bathtub Madonnas.  Not the singer, you dumb twinks, I am talking about the REAL Madonna, the BVM, Queen Of ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     If I could go through my neighborhood, and count all the Madonnas, given a dollar--no, in this economy, make that five dollars!!!!!!--for each one counted, I could take a week's vacation. Which would be no problem at all, let me assure you!

                                      Some of those Madonnas go beyond bathtub, and at the foot of this house we pass each morning, on 76th Street, between Third and Ridge, there is this beautifully mounted white one at the foot of the front lawn, looking out on the street, from the lawn's left side.  I pass by it, and say prayers each morning!

                                        But, I am telling you, darlings, it is Mary who needs prayers!  For starters, she has a pile of snow atop her head that makes her look like Carmen Miranda.  I am surprised some nasty queens in the neighborhood (don't kid me; I know you are there, closet or not!!!!!!!!!) have not adorned this with fruit!!!!!!!!!  Added to which, she is buried up to her waist in snow.

                                           How undignified for the Virgin Mary!  I object!

                                           Those of us who were raised Hard Core Catholic--you know, trying to be Jennifer Jones in "The Song Of Bernadette" --believe that the miracle is that when there is a snowstorm, the outdoor Virgin Marys are untouched!  That is how it is supposed to be, so what is wrong now????? Maybe it is time to get Sister Camille in on the act!

                                            Nobody disses Mary!   And, if I go by and  see fruit atop her head, I will diss those dizzy queens!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             Count on it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!