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No, darlings, that is not a beans n' franks lesbian, though I cannot blame you for thinking that. That happens to be Dr. Frances Horwich, she of the soothing, maternal voice that, at times seemed warmer than our own mothers, who was one of the pioneers of children's TV, via a show called "Ding Dong School." It preceded everything known--"Captain Kangaroo," "Wonderama," even "Sesame Street."
Twenty years from now, when most Baby Boomers will be wrapped in Depends, their minds having been warped by age--though not mine, darlings, it is too fervid and grotesque for that!!!!!!!!!!--caretakers will be hearing their patients espouse aphorisms by Horwich, which were learned on TV and through a series of RCA 45 rpm records many--myself included--were fortunate enough to own.
Where would I be, if it wasn't for "Ding Dong School?" I might be in real estate, or on Wall Street, rather than eking out an ebbing day job, and struggling to blog to go viral to give me the Baby Jane fame I am obviously still looking for!!!!!!!!!!!! This program had me dancing around the room, marching in step; it's a wonder I never took up dance, but then, there were my parents, and, of course, those White Trash relations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Here, darlings, is an entire episode, in which Dr. Horwich, always known as "Miss Frances" shows how to make a peanut butter and jelly, with lettuce, sandwich!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sounds yummy, to me! Those of us who were young at the time knew never
to question Miss Frances!!!!!!!!!! Hell, we believed her, more than our parents!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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