Twisted Spinster, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                     Let's face it, girls, no one in Bucks County, PA, is fond of Mary Jane Fonder!  She is one Church Lady, as far removed from Dana Carvey as could be!!!!!!!!!!!!

                     Mary Jane is the winner of this week's Raving Queen Bitch Of The Week Award, but to congregants of the Trinity Lutheran Church, she is their Bitch Of All Time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                       You see, Little Miss Mary Jane wanted to hog the show!  She was closer in spirit to Baby Jane Hudson than a woman who does good works.  For fourteen years, she fooled everyone with her mealy mouthed act of martyrdom. She even sang in the church choir!!!!!!!!  But when Rhonda Smith, who had the personality and social skills Mary Jane lacked, came onto the scene, Mary Jane was not Queen Of The Congregants anymore, because everyone flocked around Rhonda.

                           Well, you can bet Mary Jane did not like that!  Not one bit!  You remember the song "Help Me, Rhonda?"  It turned out Rhonda did really need help, because she was in danger!  Because Mary Jane had concocted--in her head, only--this notion that she and the pastor were having a relationship, and that Rhonda Smith was her romantic rival.  Now, Mary Jane had a history of mental problems--maybe she was bipolar.  During childhood, she had been institutionalized for having attempted suicide by drinking chloral hydrate.  So, with a history like that, it was no trouble to calmly walk into the pastor's office, where she was doing volunteer work, and shoot her point blank. Which Mary Jane did, on January 23, 2008!!!!!!!!!  Twice; once in the head, to make sure she was dead!!!!!!!!

                           Mary Jane thought this would end her problems, and bring her happiness.  Instead it  led to a prison term for Life, and an investigation into the 1993 disappearance of her father, Edward Fonder, with whom she had been living.  Nothing was found--no body, no weapon.  The police were stymied.  The most they could get out of Mary Jane was the meds she was on at the time might have caused her to do her father some harm!!!!!!!!!!!    Uh huh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            I know what happened, and so do the congregants of Trinity Lutheran.  Mary Jane somehow offed Daddy, and got rid of him.  Maybe in a gallon vat of acid, maybe by dismemberment or burning; there are all sorts of tricks, and this one knows them all, for sure!

                           Bet whatever Mary Jane brought to those church bake sales were poisoned!  I wouldn't want to meet up with her, though she does make a perfect Bitch Of The Week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Church Lady and convicted killer--that's Mary Jane Fonder!

                           Now, isn't that special, darlings????????????????????