Here We Are, At The Three Lives Gala, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   Just as I said, last night, as soon as I was sprung lose from work, Monsieur and I headed straight downtown to Three Lives And Company Bookstore, where I promptly snatched up my reserved copy of Donna Tartt's "The Goldfinch," which you can see my clutching in my hand!

                                    This was a Literary Night of Nights!  I had no idea who else was in the store, because we were too busy setting up my publicity shots, girls!!!!!!!  And once we left the store, I had Monsieur store the copy away, because, if anyone on the subway with us knew we were carrying--gasp!--The New Donna Tartt!!!!!!!--we could be mugged!  And I haven't come this far for that to occur!  Besides, do you think I would let anyone get their hands on this book?  I'd kill them first!  Even my beloved is barely allowed to even touch it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      As for reading it, well, darlings, I am sorry to report that I did not at once sink into
my chair, and start, once we got home. I am currently coming down the home stretch on Marisha Pessl's "Night Film," and, girls, will I have plenty to say about that!!!!!!!!!!.  In fact, I am curious to see if the Tartt book lives up to all the advance hoopla, because right now Pessl's book is looking pretty good for First Place!!!!!!!!!!

                                      But the jury is not in, until Donna has been read.   And, even when not at her absolute best, as with "The Little Friend," she is still a pleasure to read.  Give me one Donna Tartt every
decade or so, over Jennifer Egan's overrated, bordering on trash, prolifics!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         A marvelous time was had by all, at Three Lives!  Where Toby and Company see the customer always leaves satisfied!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                        So, congrats to Three Lives; you've done it, again!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         You'd never see me get this excited over Joan Didion, would you, now, darlings??????????
                           

To This Pigeon, The Hearts Of Men Are Nothing More Than Trinkets On Her Bracelet Of Broken Hearts!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  Our lovely, and lovable friend, Pete, The Pigeon, who chirps to us each morning, helping to wake us up, who perches blithely on the corner of the fire escape window nearest our dining table, so he can share in breakfast with us, has had his heart tarnished by Lulabelle, the femme fatale fowl, pictured above!!!!!!!!!!

                                     This brazen hussy was seen flying about our inner courtyard all Summer, sometimes with Pete, sometimes not.  Pete spent lots of time with Lulabelle, and for a time it seemed they were an item. I was expecting to see, one morning, Pete and Lulabelle on that perch, with an offspring  of little grey and white pigeons next to them.

                                       Alas, this is not to be.  For, come Autumn, Lulabelle forsook our courtyard, and Pete, to hang about with the more trashy street pigeons.  She will now turn up her wings for anybody; the girl
has no shame.  As for Pete, well, like Fantine, he "dreamed a dream.  She took his childhood, in her stride.
But she was gone, when Autumn came!"

                                       Yesterday, I saw Lulabelle hanging out, with one of these "bad boy types, atop the side entrance--not even the front entrance, darlings!!!!!!!--of our local Met Supermarket!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  And would you believe she turned her beak away from me?  The cheek!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         She is going to find out the hard way. If she doesn't watch out, her tail feathers will get ruffled, and she will end up out on the street!!!!!!!  Like Grizabella, the so-called Glamour Cat!!!!!!  Only, I don't think Lulabelle can sing!

                                           As for Pete, he can, because we hear him every morning. He knows he is loved, and we give him lots of love!  I have told him he can do much better than Lulabelle, and I am living proof!

                                             Look how long it took for me to find my Prince!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What Is It With People At Cultural Events, Darlings?????????????

                                 After all the drama in attendance, last Friday, at my morning screening of the new "Carrie," I was fascinated by the man and woman getting into a slug fest after a recent Jets-Patriots game.
Now, as you know, dolls, what do I know about football?  You toss a ball, right?

                                    I do know that these events are populated by crowds that have their own fan base, much as theater and opera do.  They are all part of our American culture, and thus are Cultural Events!!!!!!!!!

                                     But why should the rest of us have to worry about fights breaking out when we go to one?

                                      At "Carrie," the whole thing stemmed from misbehavior on one part, reprimanding on others, which escalated, when the film was done, into a verbal, and then physical, altercation.  I am not sure who threw the first punch at my event, nor am I sure who threw at the post game exiting.  But I can tell
you the punch the woman took would have been enough to KO me to the ground, and sent me to the hospital.  She must be eating her Wheaties, or modeling herself on Pam Grier, as Foxy Brown, because, honeys, I am telling you, after her head snapped back, she pulled herself together, pulled back her arm, and belted the guy right back in the face!  Kind of like when Frank Sinatra and Ava Gardner were married!  Ava took no crap; you better believe it!!!!  So, I sort of have to hand it to this woman!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         On the other hand, why can't people behave at cultural events?  It's bad enough, those Vicious Opera Queens tear into each other in the upper balcony at the Metropolitan Opera, but now this behavior is being extended to movies and sporting events. Has the Gay Rights Movement (which I support) freed up behavior in other people, making them comfortable turning into a nation of those who behave like a group of Bitchy Queens??????  Come on, darlings; there is no short of supply of them in this world!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Just start with me!!!!!!!!!  Why do we need to add any more to the bitch stew???????

                                            The real danger here is falling into urban paranoia.  After the "Carrie" incident, I almost swore off going to the movies in Manhattan.  Now, am I going to swear off cultural events, save for staying in Saturdays, save for WNET????????  I can't do it; it is my job to be out there on the beat, to help you girls keep up with what is worth noting happening in this town!!!!!!!!!!  And I cannot do that if the events I go to are not live!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                              Where was Security at the game???????  I didn't see any!  Start with that!
Why did it take another patron in my theater to break up the fight?  Why couldn't security or management have come in and intervene.

                                                 Technological advances, wonderful as they are, have accelerated such negative behavior, like bullying,  Among more adult members of society, this boils down to a lack of impulse control, which says, if you feel like acting out, do so!!!!!!!!!!!!  Which is what is happening here, and which must be stopped!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                  Otherwise, we are headed to the world of "Fight Club."  Or "The Hunger Games."

Happy "Goldfinch" Day, Everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                          Though some may very well--and rightly so--call it "Donna Tartt" day.  Today, her third novel, "The Goldfinch," hits the stands, and this could very well be the literary event and day of this year.  Donna's may very well be the Book Of The Year, though, from the vantage point, of yours truly, the jury is still out on that one.  You see, darlings, I am about three quarters of the way through the new Marisha Pessl novel, "Night Film," and, boy, will I have plenty to say about that.  At this point, I can tell you, with complete certainty, that if Donna had not published this year, "Night Film" might very well have made my choice as Book Of The Year.  It still might, but I cannot let you know for sure, till after I have finished reading it, and then "The Goldfinch."

                                            So, the plan today, girls, is after work, Monsieur and I will meet, go to Three Lives, where a copy is being held for me.  I will purchase it, make a speech, be photographed, and then go on my merry way.  I understand a copy is being held for activist Larry Kramer; he better not try and take mine, or otherwise, darlings, you will see the greatest cat fight between two bitches, since Anne Bancroft and Shirley MacLaine went at each other on the rooftop, at the climax of "The Turning Point," back in 1977!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            Indeed, after all the drama in my life, of late, I am happy to just quietly come and go.  Donna may not be at Three Lives tonight, but I sure will be!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             Hope to see all my girls there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                           

Proud To Have Been There, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                I will never forget May 22, 1978, which was a Saturday, and the day I saw "Runaways" at the Plymouth Theatre, that matinee!!!!!!!!!!   The day was memorable, not just for the performance, (which I will get to, darlings!!!!!!!!!!) but because it turned out to be a sad day in our family's history.

                                Back then, when young, and shuttling back between Manhattan and Jersey for matinees, the deal was my father would pick me up at the bus stop, and whisk us off to Mass!  That day, we did not go--we went the next day!  Because that day we learned that, a day or so earlier, one of  the elder Hearn cousins, Bart, had been killed in a terrible car accident!  He had been coming from a business dinner, and how much there had been, twixt cup and lip, remains a mystery, even to this day!!!!!!!!!!!!  Even so, or not, the event was terribly tragic, as he was only thirty!!!!!!!!  I always, sadly, associate this show, with Bart's death.

                               Which does  not mean the performance was any less memorable.  See the little girl, in the yellow sweater, with side braids, off to the right????  In the Catholic school girl uniform??????  That is Trini Alvarado, who was only 11, then, and, darlings, when she stepped out of the line, and advanced forward, to sing "Lullaby From Baby To Baby," it  was, and remains, something I feel privileged to have witnessed.  I may have missed Shelley Plimpton in "HAIR," or Alice Playten in "Henry, Sweet Henry," but, damn, darlings, I am thankful to God that I got to see Trini!!!!!!!!!!

                                Well, darlings, now YOU can, too!  Thanks to the miracles of technology, I can share it
with you.  Trini and Company performed a segment from "Runaways" on the 1978 TONY Awards, and a good chunk of "Lullaby From Baby To Baby" is featured!  As well as an outstanding spot by Josie De Guzman!!!!!!!!

                                  Here it is, darlings!!!!!!!!!!  And, as  Trini wrote on the album cover photo of "Runaways," "Lots of love."

                                   Lots of love to you all, darlings!  And, of course, you too, Trini!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Burn These Witches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Burn Them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 No, darlings, even after my previous post, this is not a convocation of the "He-Man Woman Hater's Club!!!!!!!!!"   This is not Girls Bashing Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I just tell it like it is;  the order that it comes,  I have no control over, dolls!  And you all know I love YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 But, really, let's stop and talk about Katelyn Roman, 12, and Guadalupe Shaw, 14.  These are the two Florida girls having been arrested, and charged, with felony stalking, resulting in the tragic suicide, last month, of Rebecca Sedwick.  She is the young girl who threw herself from the tower of a closed down construction plant, in Lakeland, Florida!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  Well, I am glad someone is being charged.  I just wish  it wasn't more, because I believe more than just Katelyn and Guadalupe were involved.  And that some of those involved were boys!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   Getting back to Katelyn and Guadalupe--it's times like these, when I think there actually was a point to the Salem Witchcraft trials.  It was in Europe where the witches were burned; here, they were hanged!

                                    Well, in the cases of Katelyn and Guadalupe, I say, tighten that rope, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!  Hang them high!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      It's not going to bring back Rebecca, but it will give her family some closure, and start making a point that behavior  like this  is not going to, nor should ever, be tolerated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      That bitch Guadalupe!  She actually posted on Facebook, "Yes, I bullied Rebecca; she killed herself, and I don't give a fuck!"  Nice sentence structure, hon!  It also speaks of your lack of conscience, which is a tip off, right away, of sociopath behavior!!!!!!!!!!

                                        And don't give me that  hormonal argument!  Plenty of teen girls menstruate, but they don't all kill people!

                                          Of course, the parents are maintaining their daughters are innocent!!!!!!!!  The whole thing reminds me of that 'SVU' episode  I have mentioned on here, from 2004--"Mean."  The parents there thought their daughters were innocent, too.  But they got sent to the slammer!

                                          At the time of that episode, I said the girls' parents should have been charged, with raising such monsters!  I feel that in this case, too.  Especially as Katelyn's mother, Vivian, (who is only
30, which means she had Katelyn as a teen, which makes her a slut!!!!!!!!!) unrelated to her daughter's case, is facing child abuse and negligence charges!!!!!!!!!!!  Some family that is!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                           I hope these girls get the justice the Sedwick family wants.  I hope they serve as a warning to others.  But I wish the others who were involved could be charged, too!  Don't just bring these two girls down, bring them all responsible down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            And they call Florida the "Sunshine State!" Yeah, right!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't Let This Skank Bother You, Darlings! Just Wait Till She Gets Raked Over The Coals!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 Which I am about to do, hons, so here goes--

                                  Ever since hearing about Rachael Sacks, (who, let's get one thing straight, right away, girls, is not of Goldman Sachs, so she is not THAT rich!!!!!) then reading her now notorious essay, "I'm Not Going To Pretend I'm Poor To Be Accepted By You," several things have been floating through my mind.

                                    First, those of you who have read on here long enough--there will be more to be said about Miss Rachael here on Thursday, and if you think that means what you think it does, you are right!

                                     The fuss over this essay reminds me, in a rather inverted way, of all the fuss made over Joyce Maynard's NY Times piece, "An Eighteen-Year-Old Looks Back On Life," back in 1972.  I never thought I would say this, but, so help me God, Joyce is a better writer!  I am not saying she is Jane Austen, but, lambs, Little Miss Sacks is not even in the same league with Jackie Collins!  Calling Rachael a writer would be like calling Jacqueline Susann (whom you know I love, dolls!) Proust!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      And to think Rachael is pursuing a writing degree at the New School, and she wants to be a novelist?  Uhm, yeah!!!!!!!!  Talk about flushing money down the tubes!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      Now, all that said--and with more to say on Thursday--I cannot help but be forced to admit that, in Bette Davis vernacular, "Honey Child does have a point!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                        Somewhere in the essay, Miss Sacks makes the point that people should not have to pretend to be what they are.  And, sweeties, in the context of my own life, I want to say that I agree
with her statement!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         She admits she is a spoiled brat.  She admits it.  Well, so do I!  Wait if our paths cross!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         But, honestly, in just that one sentence, she IS right.

                                         Look at the context of my life, dolls!  I am the Raving Queen, I am fabulous and
brilliant, and I have KNOWN I was such from the time I was born. My parents, in a misguided move, which I will never understand, sent me to the school in town where all the poor and dumb kids went--you know, from the wrong side of the tracks.  That school did not meet my needs, and I  resented all my classmates and teachers, in it!  When I got among those I should have been with, in the upper grades, well, I found my challenge and competition, which made me happy, but not the social acceptance I felt should have come my way.

                                       By the standards of my parents, I should have pretended I was inferior!  And, as I have said, maybe if I hadn't, maybe if I had been  more  snotty, I either would have been accepted, or so despised I would have had to be placed in another school, which would have made me happy, too!

                                       When these years were finally ended, and I got out into the real world, I made up my mind I was NEVER going to behave that way again.  If I felt I was superior to anyone who dared to confront me, and suggest anything less, I was not going to hesitate to let then know, in no uncertain terms!
So, they don't like hearing this?  Fuck them!  I don't like hearing the crap I had to hear from them, in the first place!!!!!!!!!!

                                         I have held on to this tenet and these modes of behavior for well over several decades!  Which is how I have survived in this Town called New York!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                          Now, if someone out there wants to attack me in the same way Rachael was, I say, "Honey, go ahead!  I LOVE it!!!!!!!!!!"  But be prepared to get yourself cut down to size!  I take no prisoners, dolls!!!!!!!!!!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      

                                            If only this blog post would go viral!  I wish it would!  And to those who don't like it--FU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            The difference between Rachael and I is not just a matter of economics; I freely admit I am not as rich as she is, and don't give a shit  about it!!!!!  I do, however,  have breeding, which she does not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    

                                             Which, as I said, does not mean that that one part of her essay is not right.  It is!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             It's not so much, her being a bitch; she is, in fact a fabulous bitch!  She is just a very bad writer!

                                              Unlike yours truly, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!