Girls, Why Not Start With The Best?????????????????????

Quelle catastrophe, darlings!!!!!!!!! What is wrong with my girls???????? No one wants free eats??????? Guess we are all too white fed and satiated out there. I thought an evening, especially with MOI, and especially at One If By Land, Two If By Sea would be a fabulous prize for coming up with a start for a new year of Bitches Of The Week. But, alas, I had no takers, so to that I say--NERTS TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

So as of this morning I had no one!!!!!!!!!! But being the creative sort I am, lambs, the Muse presented itself to me!!!!!!!!! Considering how much print I have given lately to this London revival of Lilllian Hellman's "The Children's Hour," I found it produced the most suitable cadidate this week!!!!!!!!!!

The winner of this week's Raving Queen Bitch Of The Week award.....and the one who commences the Second Year (!!!!!!!!) of this column is...........Mary Tilford!!!!!!!!

Mary, of course, is the granddaughter of weatlthy dowager Amelia Tilford. Fed up with how things are going at school, and described as having a "pathological hatred" for her schoolteachers, she runs home to Granny, and spills the beans thaat the two teachers are having........a lesbian relationship!!!!!!!!!!

Hey, when they look as good as Merle Oberon or Miriam Hopkins OR Audrey Hepburn and Shirley Maclaine, all I can say is..........good for YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
At least it was not Rosie 0'Donnell and Roseann Barr!!!!!!!!!!!

Honey, I LOVE Mary!!!!!!!! I trained for acting with her, and I have portayed her, and doing so is truly satisfying, because while my hatred of authority may not be quite pathological, it goes back to grade school with my teachers, and of course now with corporate America!!!!!!!!! So I can understand where Mary is coming from!!!!!!!! I mean, if I could have taken someone down when I was Mary's age, damn right I would!!!!!!!!! And after seeing the recent Kate Burton 'SVU', those desires are beginning to manifest themselves again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, pay attention to the picture I have posted!!!!!!!! That is Mary Tilford, as enacted by the Great Bonita Granville in the 1936 film, "These Three." And she is pictured, because, unlike Karen Balkin in the 1961 film, she gets the trute pathology of Mary!!!!!!! So much so she landed a Best Supporting Actress Oscar Nomination in 1936!!!!!!!! Honey, if I do this on Broadway, I would win a TONY Award for sure, because you know I would be the best Mary since Bonita!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mary is a bitch, whom some of us just LOVE!!!!!!!!!! Hellman should have given her some time in Act Three, but things had to be wrapped up. But for the first two acts, and two thirds of the film ("These Three") Mary/Bonita dominates it, and we are the better for it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Twist your adversary's arm, today, darlings!!!!!!!!!! Slap them across the face!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy New Bitch Year, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!