Spring Is Fast Approaching! So, I Thought It Time For Another Marriage Chat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             A friend of both David and myself recently, to our surprise, got married.  I hope she had time to read some of my columns, but probably not.  In any case, I hope those of you who have, are finding them informative and helpful.  Let's continue, with some of my favorites, from this batch!!!!!!!!!!!

                               This may be a short column.  I think Numbers 82, 86, and 87 are most important.

                               Number 82.  On The First Date, Tell Him You Aren't Thinking Of Getting Married--This is a scare tactic used by spinsters (think Judith Evelyn as Miss Lonelyhearts in "Rear Window"!) to make the dates feel they are not being baited.  I used to do just the opposite--make my intentions known outright, when I was young, when all that the guys wanted was.....well, you know!
Subtlety is the key here.  If he thinks you are not interested, he will wonder what is wrong with him, and before you know it, he will be pushing hard, and will be putty in your manicured and nail polished hands!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                Number 86.  When You're Out Strolling With Him, Don't Insist On Stopping At Every Shopwindow--  We girls all know we are clothes horses, dears, but there is no reason to frighten him away, with that, immediately.  I know it will be tough to cast your eyes away from the designer houses, but it must be done if a husband is to be landed.  Once hitched, you can spend all the money you want.   Your husband will want you to look good, especially at social parties, and making ourselves look good is what we excel at, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                Number 87.  Don't Tell Him How Much Your Clothes Cost--I mean, goodness!  You do not want him to think you shop at J.C. Penney's or Sears!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Be grateful for whatever trifle he gives you, then take it to a custom made place, and remade to your fashion specifications.  He will be so dumb, he won't know the difference.  Once the wedding is done, then you can cavort to all the couturiers you want!  But till that time, fool him into thinking you are not too demanding or specific!  Remember, only WE know the truth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                    That's it for today, girls. Short and sweet.  It has been over a month since my last one, so I felt I was due.

                                      Happy Springtime thoughts, and luck on all your wedding plans!!!!!!!!!!!!