I'll never know post-partum depression, darlings, but I have suffered from post-Christmas depression, or what some call Seasonal Affect Disorder, ever since I can recall.
On January 2, everything seems to come to a screeching halt. The festivities, the parties, the visits, the colors, the trees, the music--all slowly vanish, till they are just memories, fondly cherished by me.
This is ironic, because, had things gone normally, January would have been my birthday month. I was scheduled for mid-January of 1955; instead, I arrived rather early, on November 18, 1954. Now, of course, I would not have it any other way, but I do wonder if I might have felt differently about this month, had it been my birth month.
Now, this January 2, things did not come to a screeching halt, because we had company. Our neighbor came for a visit, with one of my best friends, his dog, Dexter. Dexter and I really bonded, and he had a good time running around the place, while I tried to keep up with him. He was particularly fascinated by our bedroom, especially a basket of books David keeps by our set of drawers. Dexter just searched and searched in there, as though after something. He also loved our kitchen, too. I wish I could have given Dexter a treat, but we had nothing for him. Still, I think the both of us had a good time.
Today is January 3. Things came to a halt. Saturday, we will put away the decorations. It always makes me sad, especially thinking about people I had grown up with, who are now gone.
I just came from the bookstore, where I picked up "Christodora," by Tim Murphy, which I want to do a re-read of. And I finished my first book of the year, "They're Going To Love You," by Meg Howrey. It is a MUST, darlings. A good way to begin the reading year.
So, I am off and running. I know I should let these times get me do, but they do. It is difficult.
Still, Happy New Year, to one and all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2 comments:
YES!! You are not alone!!! I could encourage you to “stay strong” but that phrase actually gets on my nerves because how can I “”stay” strong when I’m not strong to begin with! I’m weak!! and sad and frightened!
Seriously I am Ready for us to link arms and step lively towards that magical city!!!
Victoria,
Thank you for the support. If I knew where
that magical city was, or how to get there,
I would go!
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