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Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Girls, Every Positive Step Forward Is A Little More Piece Of Justice For Tyler!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Darlings, I never thought my past would converge with Tyler Clementi, and yet in an odd way, it has. Let me explain. You all know of my dedication to his cause, his quest for justice that I seek on behalf of himself and his aggrieved loved ones.
That quest still continues, and will, but recently a part of my past long buried has surprisingly come to the surface.

The other night, Monsieur Davide and I were discussing the Clementi tragedy, and I recalled a poem that appeared in my high school newspaper, in Highland Park, New Jersey, sometime in either 1972 or 1973. It was published under the title "He Always...." which is what I have only known it as. According to the editorial note that preceded the text, this work was submitted by a student to an English teacher in a small Southern high school. Two weeks later, that student committed suicide. I remember questioning at the time how this found its way to nowheresville Highland Park, New Jersey. For years afterwards, I kept all my papers (it was called the Highland FLING) but when I moved out of my childhood home they got lost in the shuffle. While discussing Tyler Clementi with Monsieur, this poem came back to me. I could recite bits and pieces, but not the whole thing.

Well, girls, seek and ye shall find! Not only did I find this long lost poem, I have discovered it has a mysterious, seeming unresolvable, history, goes by several different titles, plus I have some additional theories of my own, about its true nature. But, first, here in its entirety, is what I came to know as "He Always..."

"He Always..........

He always wanted to say things. But no one understood.
He always wanted to explain things. But no one cared.
So he drew.
Sometimes he would draw, and it wasn't anything.
He wanted to carve it in stone, and write it in the siy.
He would lie out on the grass, and look up in the sky,
and it would only be him, the sky, and the things inside
that needed saying.
And it was after that, that he drew the picture.
It was a very beautiful picture.
And when it was dark, and his eyes were closed, he could still
see it.
And it was all of him, and he loved it.
When he started school, he brought it with him. Not to show
anyone, just to have with him, like a friend.
It was funny about school.
He sat in a square, gray desk,. Like all of the other square,
gray desks.
And he thought it should be red.
And his room was a square, gray room.
Like all of the other rooms.
And it was tight, and close, and stiff.
He hated to hold the pencil and the chalk, with his arms stiff
and his feet flat on the floor, with the teacher watching
and watching.
And then he had to write the numbers.
And they weren't anything.
They were worse than the letters that could be something
when you put them together.
And the numbers were tight and square, and he hated the
whole thing.
The teacher came and spoke to him.
She told him to wear a tie like all of the other little boys.
He said he didn't like them.
She said it didn't matter.
After that they drew.
And he drew all yellow, and it was the way he felt about
morning, and it was beautiful.
The teacher came again and smiled down at him.
What's this? she asked.
Why are you drawing that? Why don't you draw something like
Ken is drawing? Isn't that beautiful?
It was all questions.
After that, his mother bought him a tie.
And he always drew airplanes and rocketship, like
everyone else.
And he threw the old picture away.
And when he lay out alone, looking at the sky, it was big,
and blue, and all of everything.
But he wasn't anymore.
He was square inside, and gray, and his hands were stiff,
and he was like everyone else.
And that thing inside that needed saying, it didn't need
saying anymore.
It had stopped pushing.
It was crushed.
Stiff.
Like everything else."

The boy in this poem is me. No, dears, I did not kill myself, but it echoes exactly my school experiences with one exception--I REFUSED to stop pushing. I REFUSED to be crushed. So I was saved from being Tyler Clementi, and here I am to speak for him.

My interest in this work was revived. What I can ascertain for sure, is that it is purportedly written by a student who committed suicide two weeks after submitting it. That fact is indisputable. But who that student was is up for debate. Some say it was Richard Karl Roberts, of Alton, Illinois. But I can find nothing on him. Some say the writer was from Alton; others from the South; still others from Regina, Saskatchewan.

It was said to have been written in 1972. Which would make the student close to my age, if not so, and would fit the time frame of when I first saw it. Others claim it came from a counselor in Buffalo, New York, in 1973. It was quoted by John Taylor Gatto in his book, "The Underground History Of American Education."

And still others say that it is impossible to trace the poem's author, but that it was a boy who ended his life at the age of sixteen.

Which would not make him 12th grade, unless he skipped. And how would these other items be known, if the author cannot be traced?

This points to my two theories.

Remember the book "Go Ask Alice?" by Anonymous? It was supposedly the diary of a deceased 15 year old drug user. Years later, the author was revealed to be the book's editor, Beatrice Sparks. Maybe the poem was an adult, perhaps a teacher, passing themselves off as a 16 year old? But to what purpose?

Or perhaps it comes under the chain letter rubric; something beginning someplace that has been handed down.

It echoes so many. Myself included, and of course Tyler Clementi. But I am telling you now--do NOT be like the poet, or Tyler. REFUSE to be prevented from pushing or get crushed. Just like I did.

Does anyone out there know more? Because I want to. I want to tell this student's story in juxtaposition to Tyler's. I have a long road ahead; and if I pursue such, many legal channels and permissions to pursue. But the cause is worthy, the result could be a work that makes a difference in the future.

The poem, additionally, goes by the titles
"May Your Sky Always Be Yellow"
"About School"
"Yellow"
"He Drew"
"A Poem About Non-Acceptance"
"On Education"
"Untitled"

Let me know what you find out, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





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Darlings, What About MY Shoow???????? And In MY Condition!!!!!!!!!!!




Girls, it is officially the Holiday Season, and with it come traditions unique to each and every one of us!!!!! One of mine, darlings, is the Annual Post Birthday, Pre-Christmas Cold, which I am nursing right now!!!!!!! This is certainly cramping MY style, dolls! I have been ordered bedrest by Monsieur Davide, who says I must NOT go gallivanting about this eve???? But how can I be the Raving Queen, and report to all my girls about the fabulousness that is out there, if I don't get out and about????? Nevertheless, I WILL heed Monsieur's advice tonight, in light of all the social obligations I have coming up in the weeks ahead!!!!!!!

Last night, though, found us both out and about at the Public Theater and Joe's Pub, where the wonderful Jackie Hoffman did her hilarious show, "Jackie Five-OH!!!!!" celebrating not only her life, and career, but all of us who can relate to her--and we DO!!!!!! From dissing her current show, "The Addams Family" (where she plays Grandmama, the Blossom Rock role!), Queen Latifah, and the hazards of trying to make it in this town when you are older and not exactly gorgeous (which is something I KNOW about, loves, except I AM young and gorgeous!!!!!!!!!), the evening was a blast, capped by the presentation of a 50 candled cake for Jackie and an audience serenade. But would you believe none of us got a piece????? And after the overpriced drinks and munchies (albeit tasty) the fed us prior???? I have to tell you, I was a REAL bitch yesterday, because I was in Stage One of this cold, so I was not sure if I wanted to sit through this thing at all!!!! It says alot about Jackie and her talent that she was not only able to engage me-and in MY condition!!!!--but take me out of myself for awhile; no small feat, that. But, dammit, why could we not have some cake???? We had no desert, and it certainly isn't like I want a piece of Jackie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am telling you, I had to be carried out, bundled into the cab, and up the stairs to get home, because of MY CONDITION!!!!!!!!! Nevertheless, I DID make one cogent suggestion to Monsieur--that Jackie's show be followed by MINE!!!!!!!!! That is right, darlings!!!!!! Just think--a full does of The Raving Queen onstage, with me dressed in a stunning all pink suit, complete with matching pink glasses, talking live with my fans on all things Girl and Gay, just like I do here!!!!!! I am a bit concerned my wardrobe might confuse some with Elton John and the Pinball Wizard, but, honey, let me tell you, that buzzard has flown the coop!!!!!!!!!! Can you imagine it, darlings!!!!!!!! It would be fabulous, I am telling you, FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!

So NOW I am waiting for the Public Theatre, Joe's Pub, Fran Drescher and her dog Esther, AND "Saturday Night Live" to call me. Please, MERYL, put in a good word for me!!!!!!!!!!!

Catch me when you can, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, November 29, 2010

Oh, My God, Girls; The Gowns Were ALL Diane Von Furstenberg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Darlings, I am telling you, last night I had an evening that wiped me out emotionally. Feeling a bit under the weather, I stayed in for the night, and Monsieur Davide and I first watched my all-time favorite, "The Wizard Of Oz," for what must have been something like my 80 plus viewing. It was a milestone for Monsieur and I, who had as yet to cross the threshold of seeing this gem of mine together (and we still have to get through "The Song Of Bernadette", during which I cried real tears throughout the film--and on cue, too, having seen it countless times on the screen, where it was meant to be seen, most recently at the Victor Fleming Festival at the Film Forum this past March.

But, girls, when I questioned Monsieur Davide--and you know I did,darlings--I learned something so shocking and illusion bursting it is almost inconceivable to contemplate. He has NEVER seen 'Oz" on the screen!!!!!!!!!! I mean, how do you get past the age of 30, and living in New York City, without doing so????? I told him this is something we will render pronto, provided a facility in the near future offers up a screening. OR if we visit the Land Of Oz exhibit in Liberal, Kansas, which I would love to, girls--imagine, ME wanting to go to KANSAS???-- they have screenings of the movie EVERY DAY, so that would easily take care of that!!!!!!!!!
But going to Kansas just to see a film about a child who desperately WANTS to escape Kansas???????? The sheer incongruity of it all!!!!!!!!!!

You can believe I was emotionally wiped out after the screening. And there was ANOTHER one--yes!-immediately following the one we watched on TCM. But that would be too much sensory overload, so we switched to something that we missed most of, but which turned out to be pure gold.

That was the PBS Great Performances Sondheim Birthday Celebration. I want to apologize to Monsieur on here, because I was SO SURE, like a Smart Missy, that it was held at Carnegie Hall; turned out, after all, to be Avery Fisher Hall at Lincoln Center, home of New York's famed Philharmonic Orchestra, so with all due respect to my brilliance, Monsieur was right this time.

But, girls, the lineup onstage--Bernadette Peters, Patti LuPone, Audra McDonald, Marin Mazie, Donna Murphy and Elaine Stritch--all in red, all designed in different cuts and styles by Diane Von Furstenberg!!!!! I am telling you, I wanted to wear Bernadette's and Audra's!!!!!!!!! Not to mention the singing was a how to in performing musical theater!!!!!!! It just goes to prove everyone should shop at Diane's shop down on 14th Street; I am going there this Holiday season, darlings, and I may give gift certificates there if such are available!!!!!!!!!!

This concert performance is also available on DVD, and covers more than PBS showed. I cannot wait to see the WHOLE thing!!!!!! My only caveat--why didn't Lonny (Price) call me???? I would have been more than happy to do a number; girls, you should hear me do "Can That Boy Foxtrot" from "Follies!!!!!!" Believe ME, I get the point across.

No wonder my resistance is worn down from all this overload, not to mention worry over Monsieur Davide and his condition, which is healing slowly but nicely. Meanwhile, I have to kick this thing by Xmas--and if it takes liquor and drugs I am willing. A couple of the Riviera's Bloody Marys should put me back on track. You better believe Judy (Garland) knew what to do; when it comes to music and pharmaceuticals, darlings, always consult HER!!!!!!!!!!!

But make sure you take the day after OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, I Am Appointing Myself President Of THIS Foundation!!!!!!



No, girls, I am not talking about the make-up foundation I use to make myself look good, or the one used to support my chest, though perhaps I should. Anyway, on my recent entry that was an ode to Bay Ridge, I referenced something I came up with called the "Justice For Tyler Clementi Foundation," so I thought, why not put it into action? So, here is how it works, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is not to be confused with the Facebook page "In Honor Of Tyler Clementi," and all the wonderful work that has gone on here. What I am aiming for, lambs, is readers of any age, and especially the young, potentially Tylerish (meaning you are being bullied) who need a place to let off steam, want sage advice from one who has been there, and is dedicated to stamping out the plague of behavior that resulted in the tragic demise of Tyler Clementi. It must not happen again, and the way to do that is to stop the chain of circumstances that create such an event--what one of my friends called "a perfect storm." And the first thing that must be done is that those out there feeling threatened, as Tyler was, must voice those feelings, and this is what the Raving Queen is offering. All that, and fashion tips, too, darlings, if you read the other entries. So I want all my girls out there to keep an eye out for those sensitive souls who benefit from this Foundation as is. No one will be outed on HERE, I can promise you that!!!!!!!!!!!!

So hail and welcome to the "Justice For Tyler Clementi Foundation!" May it continue to promote the legacy of social action left in his wake, and help others still here, of like circumstance, in need!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RQP, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!! Raving Queen Power!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, "The A List: New York" Is On My Shit List!!!!!!




Girls, how much more do we as members of the Gay Male Community have to stand???? Yesterday, with an upset tummy and needing a quiet day, I stayed in with Monsieur Davide, who accidentally subjected me to something I had heard about, but never seen before called "The A-List: New York!" I could not believe the inane vapidity of what I saw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sweeties, you have GOT to be kidding, because THIS A-List hardly matches any of MINE. MY girls who go on here are educated, literate, and highly sophisticated. Now, I admit, when I saw how cute Ryan was as a hairstylist, I thought, "Maybe he should do my hair!" I mean, I have always wanted to look like Blythe Danner. THEN we got to see some of Ryan's clients, whom he had worked on, and let me tell you they did NOT look like Blythe Danner. They looked like young aliens from space impersonating Liberace!!!!!!!! Remember Emmett Hunnicutt on "Queer As Folk?" He was lovable, but no one would call him butch!!!! Well, next to Ryan's clients, Emmmett is not only butch, he could star in a Titan Media film. Which, as highly sexualized as the guys on here seem to be, they would not know from one film company to the next!!!!!!!!! Girls, let me tell you, next to THIS, the American "Queer As Folk" was trenchant social documentary. "The A-List New York" is trenchant crap!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then there is this guy Austin, who just fancies himself the Flavor of Everyone's month!!!!!!!! Well, not if you don't remove that youthful pudge which I am sure you would call baby fat, but I can tell you, darling, as the Raving Queen, it is the beginning of the consequences of youthful indolence. But, hell, do you think Austin would believe anyone???? Not our Miss Austin; this Smart Miss thinks he knows everything!!!!!!!!! Wait till you OD on bruschetta, and have to be rushed to detox to have your acidic stomach pumped!!!!!!!! THAT should get rid of a few oucnes, but sweetie, if you think with the physique you have right now you are going to be a STAR, you are not only on the wrong planet, you should not be living in New York City!!!!!! You should be living in Secaucus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In fact, pretty much the whole cast, though dressed well, if not overly so, would really not pass muster with what counts for gay life in this town as MY girls know it!!!!!!!! They obviously have never picked up a book; Jonathan Franzen???? Forget it; they haven't even read "Twilight!" They wouldn't know what the former is, nor the latter, and are certainly not ready even for "Twilight!" The wouldn't know who MERYL is, or what she is doing, and you can tell by the clothes they have no concept of ANNA!!!!!!!!!!! And they expect to get by in New York???????????????

Let me just say that this show is one big insult to the Gay Male community!!!!!!! It has nothing to do with how I or my readers live, loves--oh, and do you think these guys know theater or opera???????? You have GOT to be joking!!!!! This show in its own way is as harmful for young burgeoning gay men as "Sex And The City" was for young straight girls!!!!!!!!! I mean, darlings, "Glee" may have its flaws, but its heart is in the right place, and there are often honest glimmers of gay life lived honestly. And let me tell you, Ryan and Austin, and everyone on "The A-List New York"--you think you are SO great!!!! That bitch Santana from "Glee" could put you all in your place within five seconds!!!!!!!!!

This film has about as much relationship to young men living gay lifestyles today as Algebra 2 had towards benefiting my life. Which counts for zilch!!!!!!!!!!!

You know how truly damaging this show IS???? If I were a young, burgeoning, gay man and saw THIS at a tender age, it could make me think about becoming heterosexual!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Come to think of it, maybe this show's intention is exactly that, because maybe the whole thing is underwritten by the Tea Party!!!!!! That would certainly make sense!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Of course, what makes the MOST sense, loves, is to avoid this garbage; hopefully it will not last as long as when you have to take the next bag of trash out!!!!!!!!!! And I can tell you it will have NO impact!!!!!!!!!!!!

Impact THIS, you bitches!!!!!!!!!!!!! My readers know the REAL thing, and "The A-List New York" is NOT it!!!!!!!!!! Has the Raving Queen EVER steered you wrong, darlings????????????? Stick with me, girls; I will get you through!!!!!!!!!!!

But not without a good astringent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, We ALL Want To Be Vampira!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Girls, for those of you who DO believe, can you believe yesterday was the First Sunday of Advent???? We are headed into the holy holidays, the start of a liturgical year, and an upcoming winter solstice. I mean, how much can we stand????

Now, sweets, if your Thanksgiving weekend was like mine--and I hope yours was as FABULOUS-- I know your waistline is feeling it. You can believe mine is, girls!!!!!!! And we haven't even begun the social rounds. That is why I am reminded so much right now of Malia Nurmi, aka Vampira, who died at the start of 2008. Darlilngs, we always DID want to be Vampira; I used to have a set of plastic red fingernails that were out to here ------------------ when I was a child, and I used to put them on and do her "Plan Nine From Outer Space" walk, arms extended. And back then, dears, my waist line was closer to Vampira's!!!!!!!!!

Why is it as we age, our waistlines get more and more away from Vampira, instead of closer?????? Maybe we ALL need to buy a Vampira corset, which will encase us in enough to give us that Vampira waistline feeling. I want all my girls out there to go and buy one. Oh, and make sure you go to a store where the staff is gay male, because a straight dude is not going to know who "Vampira" was when you ask for a corset!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course, the real answer is to eat right and do some of those Donna McKechnie moves and stretches. So I am thinking of going back to Yoga, and buying a sweatsuit, so that in early morn I can walk along the esplanade near Monsieur Davide, just like I used to do along the one in Bay Ridge, when I lived there, and who knows, hopefully, may live there again, to do so. But right now, girls, we have to focus!!!!!!!!!!

So as we begin this heightened Social Season, darlings, I want you all to focus on your waistlines, with Vampira as your guide. Don't worry about the make-up, hair and nails yet; those will come with time. Right now,it is all about the waist!!!!!!!!!!

AND maintaining proper deportment at all times, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!! See you on the Vampira runway!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Darlings, Carry Me Back To Ol' Bay Ridge!!!!!!!!!!!



Now, girls, I know the actual song says "carry me back to ol' Virginny," but having never lived in Virginia, my heart never belonged there. But once upon a time, it DID belong to Bay Ridge, Brooklyn, and last night, while attending a fabulous party in that august neighborhood, the feeling came back with a vengeance!!!!!!

But first, a little piece of Raving Queen history hitherto not known.

Back when I was an ingenue, dears (not that I still am not) in the late 80s, I wanted to move to New York. For me, girls, it had to be Manhattan or bust, and that meant the Dakota. But after a hotel room and some sublets, it became apparent that Manhattan the way I wanted it was just not going to happen at that time, so I had to look beyond for living comfortably!!!!! My childhood friend, Doug, and cousins, Sean and Billy (they were unmarried at the time) were all living in Bay Ridge, so I looked there, found a place, and prepared to live there for the next 50 years!!!!!!

Such memories of bay Ridge--the Italian stores and restaurants, seeing "Moonstruck" and "Single White Female" for the first time at the Alpine, where a Sunday afternoon movie for $4, followed by a donut and coffee across the street was a weekly ritual for years. Our Lady Of Angels was the most beautiful Catholic church, and the esplanade where you could walk, bike ride, or sit 'neath the Verazanno and gaze out at the bay or read was a staple of my life there.

The picturesque view from my bedroom window sold me on the apartment from the moment I saw it. And what I liked further about Bay Ridge was--though the commute was long, being a reader it gave me lots of reading time, AND if I DID NOT have to go into Manhattan on my days off, there was plenty to do out there where I did not have to.

But unfortunately, what happened was time. When I moved in, my building was managed by Sam Giordano. Several years later, he sold to Georges Poulakakis, and in 1991, the Super, Thomas Jones, passed on. That was the beginning of the end. Because, instead of employing another super right away, Poulakakis assigned his wife, Despina, who was called Debbie (can you believe it, darlings???) to deal with tenants and their problems.

Despina Poulakakis was one of these fat Greek fishwives, who was ugly, obtrusive, and hateful to everyone. You know, the kind who did her laundry by beating it over rocks down by the bay. Over the next six years, the relationship between us eroded, with problems in the place multiplying at a rate she could not handle in dealing with, but insisted on doing so, which meant they were not being dealt with at all. Things culminated when I called her "low class," and she said I "hate all the ladies" (CODA--homophobia). At said time she told me I was free to go and find another apartment, and she wished me the best of luck. Yeah, right, bitch!!!! Well, good riddance to you!!!!!!!

Now, dolls, so many have asked me why I just did not move to another place in Bay Ridge. And the truth--to this day, in fact--is that I wanted to, but was terrified of moving into another building fronted by Despina, or moving into one that was not, but having her buy it up. To escape Despina, I had to leave Bay Ridge....and I did not want to!!!!!!!!

Which took me to Woodside, Queens, where, to my surprise I still reside, for a longer period of time than I ever lived in Bay Ridge. I made one key mistake with Woodside--I thought all New York neighborhoods were interchangeable, and that I could simply recreate my Bay Ridge routines in Woodside. When I found I could not, I realized the mistake I had made, and began to hate Woodside....not the apartment so much, as the neighborhood. And even though over time I have made piece with Woodside--through a set of circumstances that included a noisesome nut, a water damaged ceiling, and being on psychotropic and anti-depressant meds--I still long for Bay Ridge.

And, honey, this was brought home by the fabulous time, we had out there last night!!!!! First of all, we got off at the famed final stop at 95th Street on the "R" train, whereupon I showed Monsieur Davide the church with the statue of Bernadette and the Vision, and then we walked to 97th Street, where we beheld the dwelling place of the legendary "Miss T," got into her lobby to ascertain her TRUE apartment number, and Monsieur kissed me on the spot!!!!! Can you imagine, girls!!!!! 'Neath the dwelling place of a legendary sexual predator!!!!!!!!

Then we continued down to Shore Road, where I beheld the bay for the first time in at least ten years, and my heart broke. But this was compensated for by David's friend, Ellen, who has the poise of Sheila in "A Chorus Line" and the party hostess skills of Mame, a role she should do!!!! I am telling you--everything from that sweet, wounded bird Alvin, to a "barkmitzvah" (I kid you not!!!!) to a wife trying to hatch a bird egg by implanting it between tjhe warmth of one of her husband's testicles (you cannot make this stuff up, dears; I mean, this is MY life!!!!!!) whereupon he woke up smashed and gooey wondering what physical damage he was suffering from, or if he still had that testicle at all!!!! Talk about ball busting, darlings!!!!!!!

But the apartment was SO Bay Ridge--no books, mirrors, metal strips as window curtains--just like a Bay Ridge diner. The cuisine was scrumptious-- delicious roasted veggies, spiced beef, latkes with sour cream and peach applesauce--I am telling you, it was yummy!!!! And Ellen's bed....girls, I laid on it, and I felt like the Princess And The Pea!!!!!! By the time we said farewell, this Princess wanted to go back to bay Ridge, and still does!!!!! So in between getting on the Fran show, and keeping up with my life at the whirlwind pace of Meryl Streep, I am asking all my readers out there to help Monsieur Davide and I find a cozy honeymoon cottage in Bay Ridge!!!!! You can even buy it for us as a tax write-off, and make a donation in the name of the Justice For Tyler Clementi Foundation, which you know I am the President of, girls!!!!!!!!!! So get cracking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And you thought my Saturdays were dull,????? No chance, honey!!!!!!!!!
Now go to the store and buy some unguent, girls!!!!!!!

Bye for now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, I Am Worried!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Girls, I am telling you, we have GOT to talk! I just found out that the New York Times has released its list of the "100 Most Notable Books Of 2010," from which, of course, is culled the "Ten Best Books of 2010" list, and this leaves me cause for concern!!!!!!

First, of all, darlings--and this is a no-brainer--"Freedom" by Jonathan Franzen is on the list. It is a far gone conclusion that this will head the Ten Best list for fiction; this was clear, from its release date in August, when it instantly became apparent that "Freedom" was the Book Of The Year. I am not a bit worried about that, lambs!!!!!!

Another fabulous book on the list is Adam Ross' wonderfully nasty "Mr. Peanut," which plays as a brilliant dissection on American marriage (as does "Freedom") and a riff on serial killer thrillers. I am thrilled it made the 100, but it will not make the 10.

There are two titles on the 100 list that DO have me worried; one in particular. The lesser worry is "The Thousand Autumns Of Jacob De Zoet" by David Mitchell. This I was very excited about initially, as a new David Mitchell is always cause for rejoicing, and even though I was disappointed with this one, I am not sorry to have read it. But this work just did not live up to the brilliance of what has gone before with Mitchell. His latest was more a chore than a pleasure to read, and while I DID finish it, love, I know others who did not because they simply were not able. And THIS tops a list at all?????? I better not find it in the Top Ten!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But, girls, I cannot believe that "Matterhorn--A Novel Of The Vietnam War" by Karl Marlantes gets on any list at all. I am SO sick and tired girls that every time some piece of tripe is written about the Viet Nam war, the heterosexual Times critics jump on the bandwagon of acclaim. Just for the record, darlings, I know Times book critic Bill Goldstein, who is so cute and gay (Ooops! Sorry, Bill!!!!!) and I will bet you tkts to Jackie Hoffman at Joe's Pub that he does NOT endorse this pretentious tripe. And how pretentious can you get with the title???? I mean, did Margaret Mitchell add "A Novel Of The Civil War" to the title of her novel, "Gone With The Wind???????????" Did Boris Pasternak subtitle "Doctor Zhivago" "A Novel Of The Russian Revolution????" Did these works need anything more to stand on their own????? Of course not; which is why they are still read today: I doubt as time intervenes Marlantes' book will be read at all, except by actual Viet Nam War participants, by whose language it is so clearly directed towards it becomes inaccessible to everyone else who tries to read it. Which is why I could not even get through a third of it. Plus it could not make up its mind what it wanted to be. Clearly, this was an autobiographic account of Marlantes' experiences, so why not market it as non-fiction, where it might have found a more appreciative readership, leaving room for more literary quality for us oh so caring Fiction readers????? Come on, dolls, wasn't Denis Johnson's "Tree Of Smoke" enough??????

I am telling you, if Marlantes' opus graces the Top Ten in Fiction, not only will I not read it, I may hold a massive protest rally at Three Lives in the name of social justice for us Fiction readers!!!!!! At least Toby can find his way into Julia Glass' texts; he is not going to go crawling through any of Marlantes' foxholes!!!!! And neither is anyone else at Three Lives!!!!!!!!!!!!!

See why I am worried, girls????? And don't get me started on that trio of critics and their Top Ten lists!!!!!!!! Do they think this is going to circumvent the ultimate one?????? Because if it is, honey the rally gets moved from Three Lives to the lobby of the Times building!!!!!!!

So let's lobby for better Fiction and makeup, girls!!!!!! Believe me, if I do not like the list, I have some titles you can read!!!!! Power to those who read Fiction!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am signing off to read some right now, darlings!!!!!! Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Darlings, Isn't She The Cutest Thing???????????????



Girls, I am telling you, if you thought I was the cutest, the sweet little thing in today's photo could even give me a run for the money. Yesterday, to stem the tide of Black Friday, I watched the World Premiere of "The Fran Drescher Talk Show," featuring her adorable, Ed MacMahon sidekick, Pomeranian Esther Drescher. Now, while Fran looked fabulous in her red dress, I can tell you Esther was calling the shots. I could tell by the suspicious looks she was giving guest Kirstie Alley, whose ounces Esther was taking in at every glance. You could tell Esther had Kirstie's number!!!!!!!

We also loved seeing Fran's parents, Sylvia and Morty Drescher, and the Fran Band, with the hottest keyboard player I have seen in a long time. Put him on my Christmas tree, and lick him like a candy cane!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, I want to be on Fran's show!!!!!!!!!! Think of it--the Raving Queen and Fran!!!!!!!!! We could have coffee and talk like girls!!!!! I could come down the stairs in a stunning pink suit--shirt, cravat, jacket and pants ALL pink!!!!!! Just like my blog, loves!!!! And I would LOVE to be on with Lainie (Kazan) who was on yesterday, or Renee Taylor or Ann Guilbert, who stole "The Nanny" as Mrs. Fein and Yetta!!!!!!! We would have such fun, darlings!!!! So I want all you girls out there, who helped get Betty White on Saturday Night Live help get the Raving Queen on Fran's show!!!!!!!!! Girls, I am telling you, it will be FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!!! And I can't wait to sit next to Esther, with a matching pink bow!!!!!!!!!!

I have to confess, lambs, that I did not watch Fran live!!!!!!! I watched her late at night, with Monsieur Davide--who simply ADORED it all, and I can tell you endorses ME being on Fran's show!!!!! After all, he is like my little Esther, and don't I LOVE to pet and scratch him!!!!!!!!!! Not to mention he looks good in pink, too!!!!!!!!!!!!

We had a party to go to earlier in the evening, that I am telling you was at the end of the world, but in a fabulous apartment of such antiquity it recalled the 1940s glamour of the one Maureen 0'Hara had in the 1947 Holiday classic, "Miracle On 34th Street." Alvin, our host, was so sweet and charming--I LOVE him!!!!!!!!!!!! I loved his apartment--the view was fabulous, and Monsieur Davide and I were mentally figuring out what we could do with it, loves!!!!!!!!!!! Lorraine was there, whom I just love, she is such a character!!!!!!!!!! So, too, was Elliot, and no girls, I am NOT talking about Chris Meloni as Elliot Stabler--I WISH--but Elliot the successful building manager, real estate honcho, I don't know what he was. I DO know that he looked to be suffering all evening from perpetual constipation. But from the way he packed it in, loves-- I mean, I practically had to get the food first, if I were to get any--I don't think constipation is his problem. But he had that look, loves!!!!!!!!!!!! The whole thing was coordinated superbly by young Scott, an enterprising young man from Queens, who is capable enough to be working with Cody at the Paris Commune. But I think he tends to Alvin instead, with all the solicitousness one needs in caring for a sweet, wounded bird, like Alvin!!!!!!!!!!!

A fun time was had by all, but Monsieur Davide and I bid a hasty retreat, as I had things to do today, we have a party tonight, and I am telling you, we were exhausted last night!!!!!!! So seeing Fran and Esther was such a comfort!!!!!!!!!

So, girls, I am telling you, there is no excuse!!!!!!!! Go to the phone lines, your Facebook, Twitter, tits, I don't care what, and tell Fran you want to see the Raving Queen on her show!!!!! I am sure Esther gets final script approval!!!!!!!!!! Imagine me in the nation's living rooms having coffee!!!!!!!!!!

What a klatch, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, November 26, 2010

Darlings, Hats Off To Jorge A. Rey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



As any of my girls know, we name a Bitch here every week on Thursday. We do not have a counterpart Hero Of The Week, but I can tell you, if we did, Mr. Jorge A. Rey would be selected!!!!! He is perched high on the cup of corporate America, being a financial attorney and a Harvard candidate, but in the Huffington Post yesterday he spoke out on the Tyler Clementi situation with a fervor that did the Raving Queen proud!!!!!!

The crux of his comments was that no one should have been surprised that it happened, given the level of homophobia that is rampant within our American culture!!! What are these idiots SO afraid of, I want to know!!!! Personally, I think they are afraid, first of all, as becoming too sophisticated. Secondly, straight men fear that acceptance of non-heterosexuality will automatically devalue them and the institution of marriage; but, hell, their behavior has been doing that all along, anyway!!!!! Homophobic straight women--and believe me, they ARE out there, as certified by my experiences with the oft mentioned on here Diane and Roberta--fear the loss of their financial gravy train, because if more men take up with men, where does that leave them, except as fulcrums for reproduction, like a bunch of overanxious Queen Bees!!!!! And let me tell you, it will not happen in our lifetime, but eventually biology will evolve to where men WILL be able to reproduce, leaving the femme of the species stranded for whatever straight men remain, or else to be placed on retainer if one of the male partners turns out to be infertile!!!!!!! Incredulous, you say??????? Just wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But the homophobes screaming the loudest now, need not fear this, as it will take place after they are dead!!!!! So, what is the big deal?????? Well, if you loosen the collar on lifestyles, then you loosen American social conformity within the other communities--business and government, for example--and God forbid we should deviate from the status quo as it is now????? As if it were so great????? I have just one thing to say to those who think it still is--9/11!!!!!!!!!!! But does anyone care???? As long as nothing hurts crass materialism, not bothering to consider it has actually destroyed America's economy, rather than help it, then who cares if the innocent are persecuted or leap to their deaths???? As long as the I's have it, no one will care!!!!!!!

So I salute Mr. Rey for his piece, whose impact is furthered by its being a criticism from within. Finally, we have an "Establishment voice" who "get it!"

But my darlings need not worry--the fight for Tyler will STILL go on, and you will get your VOGUE subscriptions on time!!!!!!!

Girls, Today Is BLACK FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Well, darlings, we made it through Thanksgiving. Monsieur Davide and I got to Port Authority just in time to greet my sister, fresh off the bus from scenic Norristown, PA, whereupon we whisked down to the Village to have a fabulous meal at the Paris Commune. Now, girls, I am sorry to report that our enterprising waiter (and my favorite!) Cody, was not there; even enterprisers deserve a day off, especially when they can be, as I was told, with their "boyfriend." Bet that boyfriend is a Wall Streeter with a seven figure income!!!!!!!!!!

Nevertheless, the meal was lovely, the service excellent, and it gave Monsieur Davide a chance to learn things about yours truly not yet revealed!!!!!! Afterwards, we went back to Monsieur Davide's, chilled, then taxied back uptown to send my sister back to PA. A good time was had by all, and when we got home, Monsieur Davide and I both crashed.

But would you believe, lambs, that in the middle of the night--3:15 am to be exact--I awaken to hear Monsieur in the kitchen. "What are you doing?" I asked. "Putting the dishes away!" he said. You can bet he was sent right back to bed, because there is no need to do dishes in the wee hours. Early morning is time enough, and will arrive soon enough. What am I supposed to do????

At least I can thank God I am not in retail, because to go near a store today would be tantamount to confronting our lovely friend, Cucumbo, from "It Conquered The World!!!!" Girls, I cannot wait to have a dinner party where I serve my own miniature Cucumbos!!!!! Maybe while doing the dance of the She Demons, in costume!!!!! But in amy case, I am going nowhere NEAR a store, as I have to dress, dash off to what is increasingly becoming my pied a terre in Queens, check to see things are OK there, do some reading, then dash back to the city for a social engagement, with Monsieur Davide, which, believe me, girls, you will get a full report on!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And on top of all this, somehow I have to squeeze in the new Jake Gyllenhaal film, not to mention the camp classic "Burlesque!" Honestly, girls, my schedule is getting as complicated as Meryl Streep's!!!!!!! I wonder how Meryl does it, honeys???? I must ask her over some Bloody Marys at the Riviera Cafe!!!!!!! If I can even squeeze THAT in!!!!!!!

Time to get moving, darlings, because the Holiday Season has officially begun!!!!
Stay out of stores today, girls, but check your cosmetics!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy BLACK FRIDAY, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
on!!!!!!!

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Let Us Pause To Give Thanks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Darlings, as you know, since it happened, The Raving Queen has been on the beat in the face of Tyler Clementi's tragic demise, and continues to lobby both for justice both for him and his grief stricken family. And we still have a ways to go, what with Governor Christie waffling on the bill, and the FIRE (Foundation For Individual Rights In Education) raising a ruckus over it, in the name of protecting heterosexuals, because God forbid anyone else should be protected!!!!!!!

But I just want to depart for a moment here to say something specific this Thanksgiving. Lord know, I have my issues with Frank Capra's film "It's A Wonderful Life", well made though it be. However Henry Travers' line about one man's life touching many is startlingly apt in the face of this year and Tyler Clementi.

Though his life was altogether too short on this Earth, I want to take time to say thanks to Tyler Clementi.

Thanks that he touched and graced his family's and friends' lives with his presence, for as long as he did. Thanks that he shared willingly his talents for music and unicycling with those lucky to share with him. Thanks for that yearning spirit smiling out in all those photos that stand now as a symbol of the yearning deserved of all young people. Thanks that he made this rabid heathen into a social activist; I, who never thought would become one. Thanks that he made a community care in a way unique for the vast percentage who never met him personally, but fervently wish they had. Thanks that the message of Tyler is still being carried out by myself and others; that, in spite of opposition, attention is still being paid. Thanks that this young man, with such talent, actually made it to Lincoln Center while still a high school freshmen, when many much older musicians do not come that close. Thanks that when we recognize someone in need, we can think of Tyler, and remember that we can do something for that person before us.

All this from someone who touched so many.

Thank you, Tyler!!!!!!!!! Thank you for the place you have won in our hearts, and the courage you give us to carry that fight forward!!!!!!!!!

And thank you, for reading this, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We Still Have A Bitch, Girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Darlings, now I hope you are all stuffed with Thanksgiving turkey, but as you regurgitate, let me tell you I still have to select a Bitch Of The Week. Thanksgiving is no excuse, not to have one, and believe me, we have a winner!!!!!!

The winner of this week's Raving Queen Bitch Of The Week Award is New Jersey Governor Chris Christie!!!!!!!!!

The first thing that MUST be said is that he is no Julie....Christie, that is!!!! Hell, dolls, he does not even come close!!!!! He is just a big fat suburban pig!!!!! But then so are most of the men in Jersey, but what makes Christie worth naming this week's winner is his hypocrisy.

Two months ago, this ape cried on camera over the Tyler Clementi tragedy. You had to hand it to this big, hetero lug. But of course this lug turns out to be a Republican, and as such he is now dragging his heels about signing into law "The Tyler Clementi Higher Education Anti-Harassment Act," because he says it infringes on individual rights!!!!!!!!!!!!

What a bitch!!!!!!!!!!! Can you believe this, girls?????? And just whose rights are being infringed on--heterosexuals????? God forbid!!!! What about Tyler Clementi, whose rights were infringed on with dire results?????? What about his family, who still grieves for him?????? What about those of us who grieve for Tyler ourselves????? Who is Christie out to protect, if not the straight students who do not need this protection in the first place. Hence, he is our Bitch Of The Week!!!!


Now, dolls, some of you may feel I am jumpig the gun here, because he has not yet actually refused to sign the bill. I know that, but because I fear a setback, I am designating him BOTW in hope that this prevents a refusal, and gets the bill signed, honoring Tyler and his family, and guarding against future tragedies.

Happy Thanksgiving, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Girls, can you believe we have made it to anotjher one?????? Where has the year gone. I am telling you, one day it is out to Coney Island, the next it is Turkey Lurkey Time!!!!! And you better believe I am going to dance Vivien Della Hoya, just like Donna!!!!!!!

So many things to be thankful for, this year, girls!!!!!!!! My fabulous Monsieur Davide, who is a constant source of love, inspiration, and delight. My sister, who is coming into town, girls (maybe to conference with Anna???), who has seen it all--husband, kids, grandkids, Highland Park, and moi!!!!!!! My father, who is still kicking at 95, and shows no signs of abating!!!!! I don't know how much Florida has to do with it, but something is doing him good???????

What I want to know is, why have they stopped showing "March Of The Wooden Soldiers" on this day????? I mean thee wonderful 1934 Laurel and Hardy version, where they all trounce off to Boogieland (my favorite sequence, darlings!!!!!!!) where the residents look like leftovers from the Skull L=Island natives in "King Kong!!!!" I swear, honeys, the makeup is exactly the same!!!!!!!

This film defined Thanksgiving for many a year, especially during my childhood!!!! So why deprive future generations of this delight!!!!!! The Boogiemen of Bogieland were SO fabulous!!!!!! It just made our hearts feel good!!!!!

But the important things, girls, is that we all feel good today, with or without imbibement!!!! So I want all my girls to give thanks for what they have, tend to your reticules, and think about what remains for you to do in the year!!!!!!

Me, loves, I have about 35 more books to read if I am going to make my goal of 100!!!!! Can I do it, loves????? Stay tuned!!!!!!!

And remember NOT to wish on a turkey wish bone with a man who is capable of correcting a love letter!!!!!!!

Correct THIS, girls!!!!! Ta ta!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Girls, Believe Me, Every Queen In Town Will Flock To This!!!!!!!!!!!



Darlings, once you have calmed down from seeing Jake Gyllenhaal, the thing to do is to see "Burlesque," with Cher, Stanley Tucci and Christine Aguilera, because this is when you will need a good laugh, and I am certain that this film provides it!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sweeties, from the first moment I saw the trailer, I knew that this was a campfest for all us Queens!!!!!!! That it owes a lot to "Showgirls" is SO obvious; that it will be trash to indulge in is unmistakable. But whether it will last, as "Showgirls,", despite all its deficits, has, remains to be seen.

You have to hand it to Stanley Tucci, playing the male, Even Areden-ish gay sidekick again. Tucci is certainly more gifted than this, but when you have three children to raise and you get lucre for crap, hell, maybe I would not have turned this one down. But being gay, darlings, I would rather be doing the Christine Aguilera role. Or even Cher's!!!!!

I hope theater owners, especially those in New York, know what they are in for. Because I am telling you, right now, this is going to be one of those movies where all the queens have GOT to sit on the aisle, because when it comes time for the burlesque moves, they will all get up to mimic them. And you know I will be right there, darlings, shaking my booty best!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So have the Thanksgiving of your dreams, loves, a good healthy dose of Jake Gyllenhaal, followed by a return to Earth by laughing at this crap!!!!!!!!!!!! Turkey was never easier to digest!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Crrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnberry sauce, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, Let Us All Not Forget Those In Need!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Granted, girls, the subject bar is pretty generic, but on this day before Thanksgiving I want to cite as those in need the family of Tyler Clementi, Tyler himself, and all those Tylers and Tylers to be out there who may, in part inspired by his tragic story, come forward to end the cycle of social bullying.

An observer in a Minneapolis paper has placed another slant on it that has not been looked at too closely--the emphasis on voyeurism in general. Now, there is no question that Tyler was preyed on due to his sexuality, but the way it was done was VOYEURISTIC. Now, voyeurism has existed since crevices in rocks; and none of us can ever forget Norman Bates peering through the hole in the wall at Janet Leigh; and didn't we all want to look like Janet in that black bra, slip and panties?????? But combine the cyberworld with the ills of human nature and you have the recipe for disaster that Rutgers University unleashed. And still has not really acknowledged, administratively speaking. Nor have any of the legal outcomes stepped forward, and we are waiting those, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let me say as a former Jerseryite, it still does not surprise me that this happened not only in my home state, but so near to where I grew up. Because you have so much hypocirisy per capita. I am talking about people who espouse liberalism of all types till it moves next door to them, or into their dorm room--and Ravi and Wei, though they did not grow up here are prime examples of Jersey hypocrisy--quick to say they have no problem with gays till.....oh, YEAH?????????????? And you know I know, girls, having heard me many times on here on the sometimes mentioned Diane and Roberta!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, as we get ready to celebrate Thanksgiving with our biological or social families, think of what the Clementis are deprived of this Thanksgiving. Think of what will be missing at their tables, not only this year but in years to come. Think of the kids out there who still need help, and who hopefully will learn from this how to get it!!!!!!!!!! And think of how you out there, my darlings, with your fashion coordination and eyeliner---or maybe in addition to it--can do something to help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, THAT is what I would call Pilgrim's Progress, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, Get A Gander Of This Thanksgiving Goody!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Darlings, it is the day before Turkey Day, which means the city is shutting down slowly, workdays are at a standstill, which makes you wonder why they exist at all this week, and all my girls have some things to look forward to. Today, for instance the movie "Love And Other Drugs" arrives, just in time for all my darlings to run off to it, call in sick, because it has one of the most potent drugs my girls could hope to ingest--Mr. Jake Gyllenhaal!!!!!!!!!!!

I mean, those PRETTY eyes, that WAVY hair you just want to run your fingers through, and that ENCHANTING smile--girls, this might as well be entitled "The New JAKE GYLLENHAAL Movie." I mean, who are we going to look at, Oliver Platt????
Like, NOT!!!!!!!!!!! And while Ann Hathaway will show all us girls how to do our make-up and hair, and to be enchanting to our men, I am sure even Ann knows the focus of this movie will be the Fabuolus Mr. G!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am telling you, cardiologists better get their fibrulators ready after this weekend, and I am not talking about Thanksgiving Food!!!!!!!! Because Jake will make so many hearts palpitate!!!!!!!!!! You better believe this is on my calendar, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!

In fact, wouldn't it be great, lambs, to have a Jake Gyllenhaal Calendar!!!!!!!!! With a different pic, quote and recipie from Jake each day, becasue from what I understand Mr. Gyllenhaal is quite skilled, culinarily speaking. And a lot more attractive than Paula Deen!!!!!!!! I can tell you, Monsieur Davide and I would just love to have our Thanksgiving Dinner catered served by Jake Gyllenhaal, and kitchen officiated by Stanley Tucci!!!!!!! Honestly, who would need pumpkin pie for desert???? Or mincemeat, when you would have meat this fresh??????? Oh, I am SO naughty, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But naughty or nice, we just LOVE Jake, which is why we cannot wait to flock to His New Film!!!!!!!!!! Take the Jake you love with you. dolls--I am taking Monsieur Davide, who is as pretty as Jake would be popping out of the water tank on "Petticoat Junction."

Remember to dress your best, girls, and that includes petticoats and panties, too! Jake always does his best to look nice for us on screen; let us make sure we look as nice for him off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gobble, gobble, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Darlings, Here Is A Wonderful Thought For The Holiday Season--GAY Colorforms!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




"It's more fun to play, the Colorforms way!"

Girls, if you are like me, and of a certain age, you grew up with this slogan, and those wonderful stick on figures with drawn backdrops. Perfect for every burgeoning gay child; I cut my teeth on the Debbie Reynolds Dress Designer Kit and Miss Cookie's Kitchen.

That was then, this is NOW. Darlings, the time has come for a revolutionary and long overdue concept--GAY Colorforms. Here is how it works.

Biff and Jeff have a house on Fire Island. Boys of all ages can dress the guys in everything from tuxes to color coordinated jock straps, while decorating their Fire Island house with centerpiece flowers for the table, Barbra and Broadway show CDs for the shelves, a complete home entertainment center to broadcast such films as "Grey Gardens" or "The September Issue," and all sorts of patterned curtains to treat the windows with--imagine a different theme each day!!!!!!!!

Just the thing MY generation would have loved, lambs, when we were gay children; in fact, I am so crazy about this idea that if it were on the market, I would buy a set now!!!!!!

I am telling you, darlings, THIS would be the sensation of the Christmas Season for young and old alike. So get on the Colorforms bandwagon and endorse my scheme. Hell, let's make it a contest. The winner who gets this put through wins dinner with the Raving Queen, and if you think this blog is scintillating, dears, let me tell you dinner and chitchat LIVE is something else!!!!! Ask Monsieur Davide!!!!

So think about this, girls, as we get our faces ready for the day!!!! I want to See this toy around everyone's tree on Christmas morning!!!!!!!

Reindeer paws, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, November 22, 2010

Two Months That Changed The World, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!



Girls, this is not to be confused with the documentary "Ten Days That Shook The World," though in a social sense the past two months have been, in their own way, as galvanizing. Today is exactly two months that the world lost the cherished presence of young Tyler Clementi. Now, some might mark this anniversary of sorts not till the 29th, when the world at large first learned of this tragedy. But the facts point to the 22nd being the day he met his death, so the Raving Queen is going by that, girls!!!!!!!!!!!

And how have we fared these two months?????? A family still grieves. To some, including yours truly, the name and memory of this young man are enough to elicit tears. More notice has been aimed at social bullying among youth. And homophobia.
And even as I write, lobbyists are trying to put forth "the Tyler Clementi Higher Education Anti-Harassment Act," with complete consent of his family. Progress has been made, yes, but at the expense of an inexcusable loss that two months later still cries out for justice.

For perpetrators Darvi and Wei are still holed up in their respective suburban holes, where they await their outcome, while the world awaits it even more as indication of how the system stands when it comes to a tragedy that snuffed out the life of a promising youth and deprived a family that did not deserve this foisted upon them of a beloved member. Meanwhile, those of us out there like moi are still fighting for Tyler, remembering, praying, and doing what we can. But the time has come for the University, the courts, the Senate and other governmental agencies to take a stand--and hopefully the right one.

Two months is not that long a time, but for those of us who mourn Tyler, both those who knew him and those who did not, it sometimes seems like two years. But I am telling all my girls on here that the fight will continue as long as we can provide justice for Tyler and his family. Let Darvi and Wei sit in the stew that is their own arrogance, their depraved indifference to the this young man's life, mark my words they shall somehow be brought to a justice that vindicates Tyler!!!!!!!!!!!

Now vindicate yourselves with facial cream, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, It Is A Social Whirlwind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Girls, I am telling you, quiet eves at home, with or without Monsieur Davide, are getting to be passe!!!!!! And now we have passed the hurdle that was my birthday, loves, the Holiday Season has unofficially begun. I say "un" because it really does not kick off till Thanksgiving Day. And to think I used to believe it commenced December 1!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, we finally got to celebrate Judy's birthday, albeit a bit late, at the Smorgasbord restaurant, which, despite my memories of it as Casa di Pre, and the white decor outside replaced by a garish yellow, I had to admit was pretty good, culinary wise. Though nothing beats the Riviera Cafe for Bloody Marys, darlings!!!!!!!!!! But at Smorgasbord, the salad, soup Swedish meatballs, with potatoes and veggies were just scrumptious, as well as the sauce they swam in. The desert of honey filled waffles with cream and strawberries was a nice light finish. Girls, I am telling you, this is a place to visit. But watch out on Wednesdays, darlings; the crowds get fierce!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday we were travelling back and forth to the theater section all day. Thank God there was no 'SVU" marathon, because I would certainly have had some kind of withdrawal. We started out with the matinee of "Mrs. Warren's Profession," featuring the superb Cherry Jones (whose birthday was yesterday), Sally Hawkins and Edward Hibbert. Worth seeing just to see Cherry and the play, but I had some quibbles with the direction (the usually excellent Doug Hughes) especially where Miss Haukins was concerned. And having just seen her as Rita 0"Grady in "Made In Darghama" I know she can act!!!!!!!!! But, honey, somebody needed to regin her in here, or help her re conceive the role, because I am telling you, it did not work!!!!!!!!!! But we loved the excursion anyway!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And then there was the fundraiser at the Actors' Temple!!!!! I wish they had asked me to perform, because I could have delivered some showstoppers of my own, but bet that as it may, it was thrilling to see Anita Gillette, who looks fabulous and still has a solid Broadway voice. Same with Martin Vidnovic and Cheryl Stern. There were also some lovely newcomers, whose category I should have been in,, darlings, but then I have to have a talk with Miss Randy Levine-Miller, because NEVER in my years of theater have I seen a rabbi reduced to the drudge work of a stage manager. As one who has stage managed before, why does the charming, resourceful Rabbi Jill want to take on more stress when she can get all she wants running the Temple?????
Girls, I would have been on Valium!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, let me tell you what is up for this week. Tonight I am on the graveyard shift, and then tomorrow I have to take Monsieur Davide to the doctor for a male gynecological procedure, which I hope to God he comes through as painlessly as possible, so he can shove down turkey and wine come Thanksgiving!!!!!!!!! Which is when my sister is coming to town to take on New York and the whole social scene!!!!!!!!

Staring ahead, there are two Hanukkah parties on the horizon, a workplace holiday party, Christmas at my sister's, New Years Eve with Monsieur Davide, followed by his birthday, as he is a New Year baby...........and then I have to make a decision if I want to trod the boards or not, because I just found out that VLOG, with whom I did "The Pajama Game" a decade ago this spring is going to be doing "Carousel," then, a show so familiar to me, and whose score I would kill to sing!!!! But the time commitment of rehearsals, tech, I don't know; we will have to see!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, not to forget the Gay and Lesbian Group Christmas Party;
not to mention what else pops up in between!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

See what a whirlwind it is, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!! Make sure you don't get swept up!!!!!!!!! Or if you do, that your hair is perfect!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Darlings, It Is Looking Good!!!!!!



You have heard on here, girls, how they want to enact in the Jersey Senate "The Tyler Clementi Higher Education Anti-Harassment Act," and it is about time. Too bad it could not have been in place, so Tyler could still be here. But I am happy to report, darlings, that, in the face of their indescribable pain, the Clementi family is backing both this act, and Tyler's name on it, all the way, insuring what they hope will be the safety and well being of all college students, to which they are entitled, and to which Tyler was too, until it was wrested from him!!!!!

The Clementis further have said they are humbled and gratified by all the support and love people have shown both for them and to Tyler. And the Raving Queen is on here to assure them that that love and support will ALWAYS be there!!!!!!!

Which is why I have included this lovely photo of Tyler and his HS classmate hugging. Let us all give Tyler and the Clementis a great big hug, loves!!!!!! Know that he is with us always, because I am telling you, darlings, I think I had a visit from him recently, at, of all locales, my workplace. I was walking out the lobby for my coffee break on Friday, when I saw this bespectacled, thin, young man standing in place, as if rooted to the spot. He batted his eyes, and smiled shyly at me. He never stopped smiling. I thought it odd, till I got out on the street, and realized who this guy resembled, so that it was probably...oh, my God!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, I am convinced it was a sign from Tyler telling us how appreciative he is of all the work we are doing. So, rest assured Tyler, that work will NEVER stop, as we still seek justice for you!!!!! But progressing is happening, loves, so stay tuned for future developments.

And if there are any more Tyler visitations, I will let you know. And he looked SO cute, darlings!!!!! Make sure all my girls stay cute!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, Sometimes It Is More Glamorous To Be The Monster!!!!!!!!!!!!




Girls, before we get to the topic at hand let me clear up some things. Some readers on here have the unfortunate notion that I HATE lesbians!!!!! Now, I certainly have no romantic interest in lesbians. And I have known my share, darlings, and some of them are quite lovely!!!! I mean, I have performed "The Children's Hour!!!!" So it is not so much that I hate lesbians; it is that I hate one PARTICULAR lesbian, and that m ore for her anti-social, Borderline Personality Behavior than for her being lesbian. Though let me say, it does not help the cause of lesbians that this Grotesque Creature. Not only do lesbians get a bad rap by her behavior, but young girls who want to come out--my God=, if this is what they think lesbianism is, they will run and hide!!!!! At least go to the Cubby Hole, darlings; even I have been there, with nary a scratch!!!!! But there is no getting around that at some point, these young girls WILL have to read Radclyffe Hall's "The Well Of Loneliness," for historicity sake. Let me say to young aspiring lesbians--stick to K.D. Liang and Virginia Woolf!!!!!

Now to matters at hand. Both photos seen here are of Sandra Harrison in her iconic role in "Blood Of Dracula." This was made in 1957, during the AIP teen horror craze. It is, literally, the female counterpart to "I Was A Teenage Werewolf"
In this one, it is a troubled GIRL (Harrison) who is put in a special school to help with her problems. The school's Headmistress is named Miss Thorndyke (get it, darlings!!!!) and the Whit Bissell counterpart who lures Harrison in, Miss Brandon, the chemistry teacher, clearly has some lesbian chemistry of her own. She just loves those girls in their bullet bra sweaters!!!! And wouldn't we love to just wear one, darlings!!!!!! Miss Brandon is responsible for turning Harrison into the monstrous creature that kills, but the funny thing is, in the process, she REALLY gives her a glam makeover, because when she IS the monster, Harrison isn't as frumpy as seen here too without the makeover. She reminds me of Edythe (RIP) Schrier from MY day, who was Miss Frump all the way!!!!!

So, sometimes, girls, it can be more glamorous to be the monster!!!! I mean those eyebrows!!!!! And see what a good eyeliner can do???? And how about that hair!!! I would be the envy of everyone with that style, girls!!!!!!!!

You gotta see this film, girls; it is one big lesbian bitchfest!!!!! Hedda should run this some night at the Chelsea!!!!! I am telling you, not only would those queens scream, they would run to their hair stylist the next day!!!!!!

Meantime, loves, I have to run--to another artistic experience--"Mrs. Warren's Profession," with Cherry Jones and sally Hawkins!!!!!!!

Talk to you, when I return from the Rialto!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, "Jersey Boys" Was So Much Fun!!!!!!!!!!!!



Girls, we were at the August Wilson Theater that eve, finally seeing the musical "Jersey Boys," and let me tell you a good time was had by all. Monsieur Davide and I finally reaped the rewards of a show with genuinely good music, after sitting through crap like "Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson". And, yes, they did my favorite, "Rag Doll." Darlings, it took me back to my childhood, when the songs would air on the radio, and I would get up beside it, and perform them. My poor parents; they did not know what to do with me!!!!!!

It was a fabulous, theatrical evening. But, girls, you will not believe what happened next. There Monsieur Davide and I were, seated respectfully like any New York Theatre Queen couple--and he was with the Raving Queen, after all--when this tourist group from, I don't know where, Jersey or North Carolina, and these two women sit down next to us. The one next to me was blonde, with that look suggesting she was trying to be Heather Menzies in "The Sound Of Music," though she was long past the Von Trapp stage. Actually, she looked like an adult version of the type of girl who would never give me the time of day in high school. Now, there is nothing unusual about chatting with a stranger at the theater before the curtain goes up; happens all the time. Especially if the topic is theater. She first asked me if I had seen "Jersey Boys" before--and I AM a Jersey boy, honeys!!!!!--and we kept the talk theatrical. Fine.

Then the lights went down, and the magic of the theater began. And that is when--you are not going to believe it, girls!--happened--this WOMAN came on to me!!!! My first thought was , "Oh, sure, a fag hag!" because there are lots of those at the theater, honey, and I thought, well, OK. But then things began to get aggressive--toe tapping, snuggling--and I tjhought--what the Hell is going on. I tried to be polite as I could, without being rude, but she just would not give up!!!!!!!

Sweeties, when have I EVER given off a straight vibe?????? Especially when I had a MAN right beside me??????????????? This was the strangest experience I have had of late, and you know, especially if you read on here, I have had some strange experiences, darlings!!!!!!!!

I am telling you, lambs, a girl is just not safe out there, even with a night on the town!!!!!!! But the show is wonderful, it will send you out singing. And it even references Bloomfield, the home of my friend Joe, and the Nevada Diner!!!!! Wonder why Joe and his brotjhers never formed a guy group????????

Cannot WAIT to join a girl one, wearing taffeta!!!!! Cheers, loves!!!!!!

Friday, November 19, 2010

Well, Girls, We Finally Made It To Babbo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Yes, darlings, last night as per planned, Monsieur Davide and I dined at Babbo, and the results were gratifying. For starters, they assigned as our waiter Joey D, who, with his tight, muscular upper arms, close cropped hair and taut ass, was as delectable as the items on the menu. For that we both went the Traditional Tasting Route, which included such scrumptious things as paprdelle in butter cream sauce with thyme and chanterelle, skirt steak in an exquisite sauce, a duck confit ravioli, figs with a fennel seed and honey sauce--to name a few. The wine flowed, and wasn't I just high spirited and vivacious. We wanted to invite Joey D back for an after dinner apertif, to at least find out what gym he frequents, but such are the vagaries of the business, not being privy to such into. But the lovely Joey D made things run smoothly at Babbo, which earns a favorable reception from The Raving Queen???????? Do you hear me, girls?????????????????? You MUSt spend an evening at Babbo!!!!!!!!!!!!

This evening we are spending at "Jersey Boys," with some truly refreshing music. The meal will not top Babbo, but what can???????? But the Four Seasons sixties sound will be music to our ears after the earsplitting "Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson!!!!!!!!!!' You gill get a full on the aisle report, girls, rest assured.

And I am wearing my exclusive camel haired Ralph Lauren coat to the proceedings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dress your best, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, Babes In The Blinkin' Sun, Sang We Shall Overcome!!!!!!!!!



Girls, I am happy to report there is hope on the horizon, or seems to be, in the wake of the Tyler Clementi tragedy. There is a a bill undergoing in New Jersey, sponsored by among others Senator Frank Lautenberg and a local congressman from Fair Lawn, that will help to prevent further bullying tragedies. The name of the this proposed bill is "The Tyler Clementi Higher Education Anti-Harassment" Act. And it comes with the complete endorsement of his family to use his name. Their attorney, darlings, confirms that while they are saddened by Tyler's loss they are humbled and gratified by the groundswell of support, and support themselves that this bill, with some help from Tyler, will do something to prevent further tragedies.

And you know this will drive a further wedge into the credibility of those two skanks, Darvi and Wei. Tyler's name, in governmental form now, will haunt them for as long as they live. As well it should. The important thing right now is that serious notice is being taken of Tyler and his plight, which echoes that of so many others. Like Matthew Shepard and Megan Kanka, Tyler will go on to iconic stature in terms of civil rights legislation, which is something The Raving Queen, a card carrying member of the Gay Community darlings, can live with, though one would much rather have Tyler about and in the world!!!!!

Wouldn't it be great if a postage stamp were issued to commemorate Tyler. I propose that, girls?????? Remember how in the opening scene of "Psycho," Janet Leigh said to John Gavin, "I'll lick the stamps!!!!!!!!" Think how many of my girls out there would lick Tyler!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But, first, lick THIS, dolls, to pave the way for a future stamp. In any case things are happening, and we will keep you posted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just make sure to keep yourselves in ermine, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I could not be more thrilled, and I hope the bill is enacted quickly. I hope there is a naming ceremony with family and supporters in attendance. Because if there is, darlings, rest assured The Raving Queen will make every effort to be there!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Darlings, For My Birthday, A First--The First Photographed Bitch Of The Week!!!!!!!!!!



Girls, the first thing I have to see is that Kelsey Grammer came pretty damn close!!!!! Ditching his wife, but REJECTING his children for frolics with some chippy flight attendant?????????? Whorrrrre!!!!!!!!!! However, in the face of other circumstances the chosen winner could not be overlooked!!!!!!!

The winner of this week's Raving Queen Bitch Of The Week Award is Andrew Shirvell!!!!! For starters, it shows how low our legal system has sunk when scum like this can become an Attorney General, as he was in Michigan, till he was being fired in the past week.

And once again the gay male community is taking it in the jaw again, because what got Shirvell out was his cyber bullying, harassment and stalking of openly gay U of Michigan

n Student Body President Chris Armstrong. What is the problem here???? First sociopasthic children at Rutgers who do not even belong in college drive a sweet, talented young man to suicide, and now an alleged adult is lashing out against someone, who, next to him, is still a kid????? How low can our society go?????

You want to know something, girls???? If the Tyler Clementi incident and all attendant attention had not happened, I bet Shirvell would not have been ousted. I wish Tyler were still with us; nothing is worth his life, but I am glad this bastard Shirvell got shafted. i only hope Armstrong and his family file legal action against him, and yes, I think what Shirvell did amounts to being a HATE crime, too!!!!!!!

I mean, you would think gays are being blamed for the ills of this country. I have said since my 20s for the powers that be to take a look at the fallibility of this country's corporate structure, but does anyone listen to me along these lines?????????? Of course not; just so long as the God of Greed is appeased!!!!!!!!!!!

There even have been some theorizing that Shirvell may be a closeted gay! I strongly disagree!!!!! I mean, come on; the man is UGLY!!!!!!!!! He has NO fashion sense, judging from how he dresses. And his arrogant pig bearing manner speaks of self righteous heterosexuality!!!!! I hope he is imprisoned and cornholed, although I am telling you now, for that to happen, Shirvell's top is going to have to place a paper bag over his head, because who could stand to look at him, so how else could one fuck him???????????? "Deliverance," I am telling you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My only regret in conferring this honor on Shirvell is his ugliness; I was hoping the first photographed BOTW would have been a bit more glamorous!!!! Hell, a frog would!!!!!!!!! But his contemptuous deeds, for which he will now answer, are too heinous to overlook!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So congratulations, Andrew, you rotten Bitch Of The Week!!!!!!!!!!! I hope your photo is used as a dart board in every gay bar this weekend!!!!!!

Make sure you toss delicately, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, Don't I Look Fabulous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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Well, girls, I have made it to another year!!!!!!!! 56 by my birth certificate, although, as we know, lambs, my PROFESSIONAL age is still24!!!! Let me just say, that, much as I wish, the woman in the photo you see is NOT me, although how I would love to wear that tulle dress, which, if you could see it in color is PINK!!!! And we know how perfect I look in pink, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The woman in question happens to be Dorothy Collins in her iconic role as Sally Durant Plummer in my all-time favorite musical, Stephen Sondheim's "Follies". This is where she introduced "Losing My Mind," which, believe me, girls, I have lived, and it is a wonder I have never performed it publicly. But I am not through yet, dears, so who knows????

Miss Collins passed on awhile back. But while alive, she and I shared a November 18 birthday!!!! Which made me SO proud, and pointed the way to Musical Theater Week

Anyway, for MY birthday, girls, I slept to the unheard of hour of 8:40 AM!!!! I had my coffee, you better believe it, then opened cards and took incoming attendant phone calls!!!!!! I also had to do some errands--laundry retrieval and bill paying--before I could high tail it into the city to Monsieur Davide's, where I am right now!!!!

But wait, darlings!!!!! The reason i slept till 8:40 was because my friend Audrey, with the lovely Ruby Ann, our friend Judy, who could do a "White Rabbit" to rival Grace Slick, not to mention down a White Russian in one gulp, and Audrey's very collegiate looking mother, all gathered in the Brooklyn Heights for a charming pre-celebration!!!!! The quiche was scrumptious, and so was the broccoli cauliflower soup. The sweetest wine and the most exquisite cake followed. No wonder this Cinderella got home so late!!!!!!!!

And tonight, girls, a staid establishment is on the line!!!! Because Monsieur Davide and I are dining at Babbo's, so we will see if all the hype is worth it, and believe me, I will report it HERE!!!!! I already have a history with the place, when it dissed m e for being single, limiting me to seating at the bar!!!!!! Excuse me????????????? Do you know who you are talking to????????????? So things had just better go perfect tonight, or their rep will suffer. Back then, I fixed them by dining at their uptown competitor, Esca, who treated me as though I were Meryl Streep!!!! Whose birthday call I missed while out doing errands.

I received the loveliest, romantic card from Monsieur Davide, a gift certificate to Three Lives, and the Sgt. Pepper pillow I have had my eye on for awhile. Darling, let us hope 56 turns out to be magic; 55 was not so bad, after all, and will be remembered forever!!!!!!!

So welcome to my birthday, darlings, and I will share the result thereof with you tomorrow!!!!!!!

And my PROFESSIONAL age is STILL 24!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!