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Girls, there has been a real need for a FUN bitch on here ever since we posted the entry on Anne Gillette. And like her, this week's selection comes from the fictitious world of "Law and Order SVU."
The winner of this week's Raving Queen, Bitch Of The Week award, is Miss Chantel Shepard, who brings new meaning to the phrase Daddy's Special Girl--and I am not talking about incest, lambs!!!!!!!! Though maybe she and Daddy have an unconscious incest fixation on one another. But I am getting ahead of myself.
Chantel appears in the recent episode entitled "Sugar," and we just LOVE the way Melissa Farman plays her for all she is worth!!!!!!! So, first, hats off to Melissa for a memorable portrayal.
But this "Sugar" has no spice, and nothing nice. In it, Eric McCormick--yes, the former "Will and Grace" star, who does an excellent job here--plays Vance Shepard, a skirt chasing company honcho who runs a dating service that gives this episode its title. He is so sleazy he is dating one of the clients, who bears a striking resemblance to his daughter--a fixation, perhaps???? Well, Miss Chantel does not like this at all, no sir, not when it takes away Daddy's attention from her, which she would have you believe she has suffered through her entire life. And maybe she IS right. So she goes to Daddy's Bachelor Pad, and confronts this Tart Missy, things get out of hand, and Emily, the Missy, winds up dead. Chantel calls Daddy, and she and he hatch this plot, where they pile Emily's body into a suitcase, Chantel travels as Emily to the train station, and somewhere along the way the body is dumped!!!! Nice, huh? I guess there is NOTHING this Daddy and daughter will not do for each other!
Now, Vance may not have been the world's greatest Dad; I mean, he could not even come to Chantel's soccer game? But let me tell you, girls, Chantel had problems from the get go. Let us start with the fact that she is named Chantel. Before she showed up on the scene, I thought she would turn out to be the illegitimate offspring of Gladys Knight and the Pips, whom maybe the Shepards adopted. So with a name like Chantel, she has several strikes against her, already.
But the next thing I had to wonder was--is she retarded, or what? Because I was never sure if Melissa was playing a teenager or someone her OWN age which is close to 25. In which case, what is Miss Chantel doing stewing over Daddy's lack of attendance at her soccer game???? And why is still even PLAYING soccer games??? This is one troubled doll, this Miss Chantel!!!!!!!!!!
Things only go from bad to worse, when the Shepards defenses are broken through, and it is revealed Daddy is taking the rap to keep his daughter out of jail, out of guilt for being a bad Dad!!!!! AWWWWWWWWWWWW, isn't that sweet. But this Chantel has a thing or two up her sleeve, and boy does she save it for last!
Forced to admit his daughter killed Emily, Vance has to own up to his daughter that the plan did not work, and she is going to have to do jail time. But NOT really darlings--because, in what is supposed to be a final Daddy-darlilng embrace, Chantel coos "I'm sorry, too, Daddy--even for THIS!" whereupon she picks up a scissors and jams it solidly into his neck, leaving him spewing and bleeding to die on the floor in front of the entire SVU Unit!!!!!!! Go, Chantel!!!!!!!!!! How bitch can you get!!!!!!!!! She fixed Daddy, good, especially, now that she is around the bend and off to an asylum, she says "And now you will NEVER break another promise to ME again!!!!!!!!!
Girls, this is bitchery at its best, and we just LOVE Chantel!!!!!!! But not as much as Chantel loves Chantel, I guess because Daddy did not love her enough--or love her on HER terms!!!!!!!!! Sound familiar, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So here is to the Bitch Of The Week, Miss Chantel Shepard!!!!!!! We LOVE you!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Now, for the Honorable Mention Bitch, which is NOT so fun--in fact is downright threatening and dangerous. This distinction falls to the GOP which today we discovered has denied further extensions of unemployment benefits to nearly half a million New Yorkers who happen to be out of work!!!!!! Darling, let me tell you, this is the kind of thinking that created a situation like the Tyler Clementi tragedy, as these are the very kinds of people who would deny he and others like him the right to live a free and individual life!!!! These are also the types who enable poets to concoct poetry like the disturbing "He Always....." mentioned on here, as well as creating the situations and circumstances that lead to the creation of such work. Let us hope that this action is protested and its advocates taken to task!!!! Otherwise, every HAVE who would deny the have-nots deserve what they get, when the stones come crashing through store windows and homes by distraught people who have no other place to turn. I am telling you, the entire American Suburban Lifestyle that began in 1947, with Levitttown, Long Island getting the blame, needs to be evaluated and overhauled before these capitalist pigs destroy everyone but themselves!!!!!!!!!!!! Who should be destroyed in the first place!!!!!!!!!
Bitchy enough for you, darlings??????????????????????
Love you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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