Girls, It Was Just Me In The Kitchen All Weekend!

Darlings, you would not believe the weekend I had. It started with me going to the market to get all kinds of ingredients, because, in one day, on Saturday, loves, I wanted to make the Chocolate Cream Pie made by Amy Adams in "Julie and Julia," and then I wanted to get into New York to see "The September Issue," the indie documentary on Anna Wintour, who in case you don't know, darlings is the high priestess of the fashion world that we all love, darlings! I am telling you, Anna Wintour is GOD!!!!!!!! Actually, she is probably tougher!

But me weekend, girls, turned into a scene right out of "Julie and Julia". I began in mid morning and did not finish till 5PM! The results were interesting but as I was juggling several different tasks, the phone kept ringing, because my friend, Danny, could not understand what I was doing and that I could not just drop everything to see a movie, the toilet was leaking, and my stove, while working, was not perfect. I had the super in and out while I was doing all this, and now he and others have to come back tomorrow, and I have to stay home. I mean, is this my life, or what?

Let me tell you, lambs, when I spooned the chocolate filling into the pie crust I felt just like Amy Adams. I also set it in the fridge to congeal and, darlings, let me tell you, it did! Who would think I could make a pie? Plus the filling was so scrumptious I could make a batch and serve it over fruit with my book group! I could be the social success of the Fall Season!

Let us just hope I survive my day of confinement and that things get done! Because I have other things to attend to this week, and my next project has got to be the summer squash casserole, while the summer squash is still in season.

So, it's back to cooking and love, girls. I can onl pray the former get me the latter!
Love to all, sugar darlings!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, Just A Few More Hours Till You Can Remove Those Girdles!!!!!

...And then the weekend will be here, and girls I plan to cook up a storm and get my hair done. Tonight I may sautee the vegetables to get ready for this weekend's pasta dish, and I will have to go to the market several times for that and the chocolate cream pie recipie. A pie plate or one with graham on it! Darlings, I have to do my Amy Adams thing because before you know it I will be a culinary genius. And how about that title, "Antibiotics At An Irish Wedding?' But tongiht I am taking David home and then home to Queens, where I will do something. Maybe stop at Fairway for summer squash!

Damnit, I just cannot WAIT to get outta this girdle!

Girls, It Is Back To Fashion Tips And Hair!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, this weekend the film to see is "The September Issue," a documentary profiling fashion high priestess Anna Wintour. Now there are days where I am such a bitch some people think I AM Anna, so it would be interesting to put the two of us in one room. But I have recovered from my attack yesterday and after I get David safely home I am going to spend this weekend cooking like Amy Adams. I have GOT to attempt the chocolate cream pie if I am going to feel fulfilled and feel that the possibility of a husband exists!!!!

I mean, what is it with men? Can't they make up their minds about some things, at least? Like their sexuality???? I know I expect more from others because I am brilliant, but damnit brilliance expects brilliance!!!! I left Linda Johnson and that whole Goat Alley thing far behind!
I turn my nose up and my thumb down on it!!! Imagine Chris Oswald (RIP) calling me a "goddmamn stuck-up snob!" You know something? She was right! And I am damn proud of it!
Trouble was I should have said it back then! But look what happened to her--trash like her gets up getting killed in a car accident like Ginny in "Splendor In The Grass." So I am here to tell you, girl, that if you feel you are superior, make no appologies for it! And if anyone tells you any different show them the writing on the wall. That's what happeend with Vincent; he questioned my brilliance a bit too much, and I put him in his place! Now he has nothing to benefit from!
Toujous too bad!!! I will give you a full report on Anna this weekend, girls! And lick some cream! Chocolate cream, I mean, pets!!!!!!!!!

Girls, I Just Have To Bitch!!!!!!

I am feeling like a real bitch today, darlings, one reason being I did not get much sleep last night. This was my fault, because last night I overate and drank at Marinella's. Guess I should do what Julie Powell says and stick to your kitchen, where you know where what you are eating is coming from.

The other reason to bitch are stupid New Yorkers or out of towners who don't know how to walk. I mean, when you approach them, instead of getting out of your way, they expect you to move for them! Sweetie, I don't move for ANYONE!!!! I am too fabulous for that!!!!!

Here I am less than three months shy of my mid-Fifties and no partner or prospect of one. Forget sex; I mean, huh? what is that? I can't remember. So I am just fit to bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch!!!!!!!!!!

I think I need a good dose of Amy Adams. I need to attempt that chocolate cream pie!Or something that will make me feel accomplished and accepted!

Rest assured darlings I will not give up. I may be down, but I ain't through yet!!!!

Darlings, I Don't Know How I Keep Up With Myself!!!!!!!!!!

Sweeties, I am telling you, what with my screening last night of "In A Lonely Place," with Gloria Grahame sauntering sultrily across the screen in a stunning series of eye-catching fifties outfits, plus the pile of work I have in front me, which I cannot even finish, because of the desk schedule, and then having to visit my friend David in the hospital as he valiantly fights for his life...girls, it's not easy. It's not all Julie and Julia, much as I would love it to be. I am telling you I think I need something to relief stress and after my visit I may check out East of Eights to see if they have the beef bourgenon, or I may just go down to Marinella's and pay them a surprise visit! Hell, I deserve it because, I am SO fabulous, darlings.

Then there is my friend Doug, whom I adore, and have since when we were in kindergarten in Irving with that witch named Mrs. Compton who should have been burned at the stake, but who (Doug, I mean) has yet to experience the radiance of Amy Adams. It is just a matter of time, of course, for how can anyone resisit Amy. But to confuse the remarks Time Magazaine made about Julie Powell with Adams herself is not to be overlooked. And as far as what was said about Powell, save for her culinary skill, it is equally applicable to me. I want, after all, the contemporary payoff of fame, I feel it is owed, after what I had to go through in Highland Park and with some of my overbearing Neandrathal relatives, and while I did not consciously start this blog, loves, with the idea of leading to something, I am beginning to see now where it just might possibly. And of course I welcome comments on it all the time, even if those comments tell me to go fuck myself, because you know what, dolls? I will just tell you to go fuck yourselves right back. You can say whatever you want to me because this bitch has heard it all and is not about to be knocked down by the scum of middle class conformity!!!! So kiss me and love me or not because I am here to stay, and don't anyone forget it!

So tonight it is the hospital and a bite afterwards. I may do some cooking tonight! See you all later, darlings!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, Where In The World Am I Going To Get Some Beef Bourgenon????

Let me tell you, darlings, that in spite of that SOB Mr. Weisner I am going to dine on the above,if only I can find a place that will serve it. And of course with a fine red wine. Now there is the Paris Commune on Bleecker, and the East on Eight with their Julia Child menu, so we will see, but tonight, girls, I have to get down to the Film Forum to catch Gloria Grahame in one of her great roles in Nicholas Ray's "In A Lonely Place," which is being shown again by popular demand. So I may not have time to pop in for some beef bourgenon tonight. So help me, if old man Weisner comes near me and tries to insinuate his way into my graces I will cut him down dead; I will destroy him like the young Briony in "Atonement," and you know, darlings, what a bitch I can be when I set my mind to it. But I think after yesterday when I glared at him, he will
steer clear of me. But he is not going to prevent me from dining on beef bourgenon when I want to. Of course, by winter, I want to make my own, and I plan to, but we will have to see. Maybe I should just learn to open a bottle of wine and get drunk. Then before you know it I will be an alcoholic, which is just what I need, what with all the moral depravity in "East of Eden," the Great American Epic Novel. Darlings, I may be down but Mr. Weisner is not going to have me down for long. That sot is ready for the canner's and he looks like he will croak over any day. Hell, he has so little flesh on him, if he were to get cancer, it would take him within a week!!!!
See what a bitch I can be, girls??? Let's hope I can get to that film or some bourgenon in me to make me feel better. Then it will be back to fashions and hair tips, girls!!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, Do You Think It's All "What's The Matter With Helen?"

I am talking, of course, about my life, darlings, which, like everyone else, has its own peaks and valleys, even if I am more brilliant and fabulous than anyone else. To which, girls, I just HAVE to give you a full report of Saturday night, when I made a brief but telling appearance at John Falcon's birthday party. Sweetie, the room was packed--even spinster and diva wannabee Barbara Mohr was there, with Abba videos blasting and of course movies in the bedroom..uhm hmmm! But, sweethearts, I have to tell you, the bathroom simply sparkled, though I would suspect that is Matias' doing. John's partner, who as far as I am concerned, is quiet, gracious, and can do a hell of a lot better than John. As I walked about the place I noticed very little in the way of decoration and no books, which, which darling, bespeaks to me of a culturally lowbrow household, which is something I simply cannot tolerate. But the gorgeous, quiet, tree laden pre WWII building neighborhood floored me. I mean, girls, how can they afford it? No one has any idea of what Matias does, while John teaches at some Catholic school, which is hardly Wall Street, darling, but then running up to Boston for spiritual and scriptural programas and certificates. I think Daddy and Mommy are funding all this, because his manner and bearing are that of such a spoiled Italian boy. No wonder his behavior in choir has been the way it it, though I have noticed with the advance technique of Tom McGuiness he has not been coming to choir quite so often.
How interesting. But the evening was a success, we signed John's birthday book and a good time was had by all. Did I resent it?l Not a bit, because darling my place is a monument to sophistication and literature, and everything else can go to the wayside. And yes I was right, there was certainly no action to be had here in Jackson Hts. You would think a borough named Queens would afford more opportunities, but darling, I am telling you, I did my duty and went my merry way. Love to all, girls, who were there, and hope to see you again at even more sophisticated gatherings!!!!!!!!!!!!!