Well, Girls, Lightning DOESN"T Strike Twice!!!!!!!!!!

Darlings, last night I was so tired out from my excursions the night before I couldn't begin to set my experiences down. May the Bronte sisters forgive me!!!! Well. Monday night I decide to check out the Local Dive, where my friend, Max (you know, darlings, the nebbish) was allegedly proposed to. The Local Dive turned out to be Gene's, an Italian mainstay in the Village, on West 11th Street, which I had been meaning to try. So I tried it. And let me tell you, girls, it says volumes about the differences between Max and myself. But then remember he is the one with the relationship. I am still single and alone.

Gene's is at first glance charming. After the environment sinks in, the darkness of the lighting suggests less romantic atmosphere than a visit to the Hudson sisters' household in 'Baby Jane.' Looking around the room the clientele--whose average age is 70, and who would appear to be
gumming their food rather than digesting it--suggests more a nursing home than a romantic night spot. But then, dears, Max always was a bit of a convalescent himself, which is why he would fit right in here. The food was on the whole average, the service efficient but hardly friendly; not quite hostile, but , girls, let me tell you, if you dropped your napkin here, not only would you be expected to pick it up yourself, but you wouldn't want to see any of the staff butts bent over.

What did we learn, sweets? That this restaurant is not suitalbe for MOI. That if this is where Max was proposed it speaks volumes of a relationship that I would care not to HAVE. Darlings, when I am proposed to--and I am determined there be a WHEN--it will be at One If By Land, Two If By Sea, which is much more MY style, loves. We also learned we wasted ourselves a perfectly good evening, just like last week wasting my eyes and brain on that literary tripe called "Earthly Powers." Mr Burgess should have hung it up as a novelist after "A Clockwork Orange."

And speaking of hung, I don't care if Max or his partner are hung like horses, (I can for certain, lambs, tell you that Max is NOT) this is not what I am looking for in a restaurant, dining
expereince, or relationship.

Maybe that is what I was supposed to learn, girls! In which case the evening was a sort of success.

And just wait till tomorrow night when I bitch slap Julio with a paddle at our Book Group!!!!!

Kisses to all!