Wednesday, December 31, 2014

And So, To 2014.................Farewell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             Well, dears, here we are!  This will be my last blog post for 2014!  When next I post on here again, it will be 2015!!!!!!!!!  Can you believe it??????????

                              It has been my pleasure to write and share with you all year long!  And my best wishes to all in the coming year.  May it be more or less like this one was for me--a bit of drama,here and there, lots of fun, but no major trauma!

                               And there are some events coming up in 2015--like my father's Centennial Birthday Celebration!  I can't wait to write about that one; it's going to be right out of "August: Osage County!"

                                 So, farewell, my preciouses, and see you next year!  Here is a remembrance to go out on!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  Until next year, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Most Egregious Mistake Made This Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                      Ever since January 1 of this year, film mavens knew it was the 75th Anniversaries of the two films listed above.  All year long I was looking forward to New York screenings in theaters to mark those anniversaries.  Because, let me tell you, once viewed on the screen, you will not go back to either any other way.  And if you have never seen them on the screen, then  you--REALLY!!!!!!--have not seen them!

                     Was "12 Years A Slave" the reason for "Gone With The Wind" not being shown?  Fuck that!
As for "The Wizard Of Oz," what gives?  Ted Turner, you fucking  bitch, cough these films up, so  viewers can see them on screen, where they can be celebrated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                      Of course, by that time they could be 76 years old!  But give us a chance to honor our favorites!!!!!!!!!!!

                       Because, frankly, my dears, lots of us out there DO give a damn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, My God, Girls! How Could I Possibly Forget??????????????????

                                         Of course, there is one reason most everyone on here reads--to find out who the latest Bitch Of The Week is!!!!!!!!!!  I mean, why not???????  Of course; makes sense to me!!!!!!!!!!  So, naturally I have made Bitch Of The Year an annual posting, so here it is!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         The winners--for there are two--of The Raving Queen Bitch Of The Year Award is--the Slenderman Girls, specifically, Morgan Geyser, and Anissa Weier, who were only 12, sometime back in June, when they attempted to murder a classmate, to impress a game character called Slenderman.

                                           The classmate, fortunately, survived.  But the girls, pictured below, don't have too bright a future--being tried as adults, they could be facing prison!!!!!!!!  I hope so!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             What is it with some girls?  I wish someone would explain it to me!  Meanwhile, this is the last bit of congratulations you will getting, Morgan and Anissa, you bitches; guess you won't be going to the prom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                               Congrats, demons!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I Am Coming Down The Home Stretch, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So, Here Goes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             What were the Top Events that defined me, in 2014?  Well, to paraphrase Elizabeth Barrett Browning, let me see if I can list them!

                               1. I turned 60, on November 18.  And what a party!

                                2.I got fitted for an engagement ring at Tiffany's!  And almost got fleeced!

                                3. For the first time in 24 years, I did NOT make it to the Mermaid Parade!
                                     But had wild, equally much fun with my beloved, and Auntie Alvin!!!!!!!!!
                                 4. I got to spend another year of contentment, in Bay Ridge, with
                                      my beloved.

                                  5. Several weeks prior to my birthday, I was possessed by the spirit if
                                        Hayley Mills, even though she is still alive.  It has led me to explore
                                      her post-Disney work.

                                   6. Baby Gojira  turned 10 this year, and we had a huge party for
                                         him in August!

                                    7. Big Gojira, whom we love, consolidated his star status for sixty years,
                                          with a brand new movie, where we watched him save the world!
                                        Yea, Gojira!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     8. I finally got to see a live performance of "King Lear," at the

                                      9.   I acquired several new readers during 2014!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   10.    I discovered "Middlemarch" holds up, no matter how many times
                                               it is read!  This was my fourth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             These are just ten of teh events that shaped me this year!  How shall the next one be?

Musical Number Of The Year--"The Name Game," On "American Horror Story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                                  I know, I know, it was first aired in 2012.  But you all know how busy I am, as The Raving Queen!!!!!!!!!  So, while I only saw this for the first time this year, I knew instantly it was a television highlight that I would have to share!  And have shared!  And am sharing once m ore, at the end of the year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  It is worth it, just to see Sarah Pauslon dance so skillfully!  Not to mention Naomi Grossberg, as Pepper!

                                   I have just about mastered all the choreography, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Most Unusual Photograph--Hysterical Nurse Being Meanced in "Attack Of The Fifty Foot Woman" (1958)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                           I am telling you, girls, if you go to any of your doctors, and witness any behavior like this from the nursing or support staff, grab your records, and dash out the door!

                            Actress Eileene Stevens, in this photo, must have been told to go for the Oscar gold, or else she instinctively knew, that, as a B actress, this would somehow be her signature claim to fame!  Smart move on your part; Eileene; too bad you died in 1993.  You would be 98 by now, and a hit on the Horror Convention circuit.  I doubt if anyone from the 1958 film is still alive, but this photo does it for me, when I think of this film!  So, it gets mentioned, as a tribute to this year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Speaking Of Sister Camille, Darlings, How About Person Of The Year????????????????????????

                               I could not ask for a a more charming and inspirational figure for Person Of The Year than Sister Camille D'Arieenzo, of the Sisters Of Mercy.  Her weekly broadcasts on Sunday mornings I wait for breathlessly, coffee cup, in hand.  She is forward thinking, is certainly no Gladys Cooper, as Sister Marie Therese Vazous, and I bet she makes a mean tomato sauce!

                                So I just want to thank Sister Camille, on behalf of all of us here--myself, my beloved, Baby Gojira , Ramsey and Rover plus (I am including him for Sister Camille's sake) Igor!!!!!!!!!!!  Not to mention our beloved Cujo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 Though we have never met, thank you, Sister Camille!  There may be a wedding in our future, and we would love to have you!

                                  Stay tuned, on here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Most Underrated Fashion Icon--Aunt Ida!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                       It is too bad the great Edith Massey--who played Aunt Ida in "Female Trouble, back in 1974, (that's 40 years ago!!!!!!!!!!) and died just a decade later, in 1984, at the age of 66--is not alive today!  First, she would be 96, and the hippest 90 plus oerson in history!  Aunt Ida is a fashion symbol for all time: she shows how real people can dress, how even trash like Mama June, and others like her, could glam up, if they just put their minds to it!!!!!!!!!

                        Of course, Aunt Ida is anything but trash, because her observations on Life are just so forward thinking.  Listen to her discourse here, and take note!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                          Even Sister Camille would approve of Aunt Ida!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                          You just gotta love her, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Most Overhyped, And Worst, Cultural Event Of the Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                              Once I put my thinking cap on, it was not hard to come up with something to negate on.  Last year's NBC "Sound Of Music LIVE!" was an abomination, and I was hoping their December plans for this year would make up for that.  I could see the possibilities  in "Peter Pan," though I am a bit prejudiced, having been a member of the generation raised on Mary Martin!!!!!!!!!!!  Still I was willing to rear in my claws!

                              I should not have been!  Because, when the magic of Peter entering the Darling Nursery through that enormous window, then flying out, with the Darling Children to Neverland, fails to work, you  have lost me!  Not to mention Allison Williams was as butch as anything out of Henrietta Hudson's!  Even Mary Martin, an acclaimed lesbian herself, and a good deal older than Allison, was a more convincing Peter!!!!!!!!!!  It hinges on something called TALENT, loves, which Mary had in spades, while Allison has not one iota!  And when Christopher Walken, quirky as he is, is off his kilter as an actor, you know something is wrong!!!!!!!!!!!

                           I just could not bear to watch this train wreck!  Next year, I hear they are going to do "The Music Man!"

                            Heaven help us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Three Most Inspirational Moments In Film!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   Girls, you know things are beginning to wind down, when they get visual.  I could not decide to do this as three separate posts or as one.  I decided the latter would be more honest, and tie in the concept of "moments."

                                      The moments chosen are ones you have all  known.  I will share them with you, in the order that I first saw them.

                                        Let's start with--Judy Garland singing "Over The Rainbow, in"The Wizard Of Oz."  Back in 1959, my parents, fed up with my only watching cartoons, wanted me to see something "real."  Obviously, their intentions got mixed up along the way, for this ultimate fantasy film, molded my life, sent me on my merry way, and, of course, who would not have been captivated by Judy's voice?  I have a feeling this tops many people's Movie Moments, and it will endure forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         Next up--The Initial Vision, in "The Song Of Bernadette."   I am sure this does not top many people's Movie Moments, but it does mine.  Having been raised Catholic, with issues, this gave me something to believe in, and be guided by, via Jennifer Jones' brilliantly internalized performance, combined with Arthur Miller's award winning cinematography, and Alfred Newman's Oscar winning score.  And yes, darlings, that IS Linda Darnell, up there, as the Virgin Mary!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                           Now, strange as it may seem, I saw 'Bernadette' before I saw "Gone With The Wind."  I was 13, when 'Bernadette' aired on Channel 7's 11;30 Movie, "The Best Of Broadway," on Saturday, December 26, 1967.  "Gone With The Wind" I did not see until the following year, on February 25, 1968.  I was 13, in seventh grade, and all of the same filmic combinations united to create a moment to guide me in my life, and stand out as perhaps the most non-sing operatic film moment in history!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            Agree, or not, these are my choices!!!!!!!!!!!  If you want to share your ones, dolls--go ahead!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Book Of The Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                               Damn; even as I am writing this, the cover jacket of Anthony Doerr's "All The Light We Cannot See" keeps appearing before my eyes.  That is because Prose's book and his I really wanted to tie for Book Of The Year, but her structural soundness just edged him out.

                                 So, read "Lovers At The Chameleon Club--Paris 1932," then read "All The Light We Cannot See,"

                                 The year would not have been complete, without both!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  Don't you be caught short, now, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Last Major Loss Of The Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            It is almost fitting the year end with the death of an icon, and yesterday, it did, with the death, in London, of two time Oscar winner, Luise Rainer!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            I was just talking to several of my friends, about how, in just 12 days, Luise would be celebrating her 105th birthday.  Well, I guess that's that.  But she was the first to win Oscars consecutively, and the oldest  living Oscar winner.  She will hold that record for quite some time, if not all.

                             I loved her in "The Great Ziegfeld," but I am telling you, she is simply brilliant in "The Good Earth!!!!!!!!!!"

                              Bye, bye, Luise!!!!!!!!!!!!  Rest In Peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Saddest Losses Of The Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                           Don't anyone start with me on Philip Seymour Hoffman!  He was talented, if overrated, and I am not crying over him!  So there!

                             Robin Williams' death, on August 11, of suicide, was an all too human tragedy that touched us in ways beyond most celebrity deaths.  Having myself lost someone to suicide, I get the pain.  And, yes, it was Williams' choice, just as Hoffman;'s was his, but Williams was trying to stave off pain, while Hoffman sought hedonistic pleasure.  Not to mention Williams was infinitely more gifted, humorous, and a cultural icon for nearly 40 years, ever since his first appearance as Mork from Ork!!!!!!!!!!!  The arts world lost a great talent, the sort that comes along, once in
a lifetime.

                                   Much the same could be said of Joan Rivers!  I loved Joan, and still do.  I bet she would have loved this blog!  And my heart goes out to Melissa and her son!   Joan was 81, but she had far many years left to her, which I know she would have spent working.  I guess God needed her now, to work that Great Lodge In The Sky!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      The legacies of these two will live on, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Movie Of The Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             Bitchy Theater Queens may carp and complain at me; go ahead, sillies, because I will smack you back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Despite some slight qualms, the film is beautifully cast and acted, sung by a cast who can actually sing, and, with more score intact than I could have imagined, is the best film adaptation of a Sondheim musical.  What more can I say, except what MERYL says to Baker and his Wife--

                              "GO TO THE WOODS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The Last Book Read In 2014!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   I had hoped to round out the year, with what I am currently reading, or rereading, which is "Stoner," by John Williams, (no, darlings, not the film composer!!!!!!!!!!!) so "The Corn Maiden And Other Nightmares"ends the list, at number 53--which is practically a book a week!  My goal for next year is to up that, darlings!

                                     My copy of the book was incomplete, but the title story alone, a novella, really, is worth reading for its exploration of childhood bullying, and its dark twist, at the end.  The other stories confirm that horror is not just supernatural; it is what we perceive, and are frightened by. in the real world around us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                    More Joyce next year!  Definitely!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Time To Wind Down The Year, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                               This day is a hard one, loves.  It is not only the last day of December, but the last day of 2014.  Saying goodbye to a month is one thing, but a year is something else!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 So, the wind down begins!  As my contribution, I offer a series of best, worst (well, maybe!!!!!!!!!!) or most posts, that best sum up the year, culminating in a final farewell.  I think this is the day I spend most chained to this blog.  So , settle back, darlings, here we go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did You See Bobby Greenlease Last Night, On "A Crime To Remember," Dolls????????????????????????

                                          I have to hand it to this program--they know how to open, and close, a season.  They opened with one of the century's most notorious murders, and New York City's most notorious--the Kitty Genovese Case, back on March 13, 1964.  For their Season Finale, they chose what is, next to Leopold and Loeb kidnapping and killing Bobby Franks, 14, on May 21, 1924, the most heinous child murder in history--the abduction and murder, in September, 1953 of Bobby Greenlease, the 6-year old son of wealthy auto dealer, Robert Greenlease, Sr. and his wife.

                                          My beloved asked me if I had learned anything from the broadcast, because I had read, several years back, John Heidenry's 2009 book on the case, "Zero At The Bone--The Playboy, The Prostitute, And The Murder Of Bobby Greenlease."  Maybe what I am about to say was in the book, but it has been awhile, so I forget.

                                            When it comes right down to it, the whole thing could be blamed on Greenlease's adopted son, from a previous marriage, Paul.  He was in his teens, by the time Bobby was born, and a ton of trouble, so he was sent off to Kemper Military School, in Boonville, Missouri.   This is where he and Carl Anthony Hall, destined  to be Bobby's kidnapper and killer, met.  Hall was himself from a wealthy family, and was sent to the same school.  Hall never forgot Greenlease--or that his family had money.

                                              But he was a loser and barfly, who went through a $200K inheritance in five years!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Somewhere down the road, he met fellow loser and barfly, Bonnie Heady, who could barely make it as a prostitute; she was so fat and ugly, she could only get money from trolls, the elderly, or blind men!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Carl worked his charm on her, and these two pieces of scum cooked up a plan to kidnap Bobby and extract $600K from his family.

                                               Bobby was abducted from a Catholic school, Notre Dame de Sion, in Kansas City Missouri.  Bonnie posed as an aunt, saying his mother was ill, and the nuns bought the story.  I liked the story being told by one of the nuns who witnessed all as an outside observer, and carries with her, forever, reluctance and guilt.  As they all should, at that school!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                 The money was gathered.  Only about $200K plus of it got back to the Greenleases.  Bobby was killed, with a bullet through the head, that same day, across the state, in  Johnson County, Kansas!  When Hall and Heady were eventually caught. and Bobby's corpse turned up, buried in the back yard of Heady's Kansas City dwelling.

                                                   That Carl and Bonnie were some pieces of trash.  They were so reviled, that, within 30 days, they were caught, tried, sentenced, and executed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  You couldn't get that to happen, today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             Just look at these two!  Scum all the way!  To Hell, with them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                             But my final words are saved for those whom, I feel should equally share blame--Paul Greenlease, and the nuns, back then, at Notre Dame de Sion.  In the immortal words of Betsy Palmer, as Mrs. Voorhees--

                                              "......what you DID to him!  LOOK what you DID to him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

For My Final Film Of 2014, The Story Of A Real Scumbag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   What does one see, after viewing the latest MERYL film????  Why the latest one from AMY Adams, of course.  "Big Eyes," which will definitely be my last film of 2014, is a nice one to end the year, with a quality film, featuring one of the worst scumbags on record.  I am telling you, Walter Keane, played by Christoph Waltz, is a character to despise, and he plays the role, without  arousing any degree of sympathy.

                                     He was a loser, and a failure as an artist, who happened to latch onto Margaret Keane, whom he married, and used her to further his career.  Margaret is the one who actually painted those "Big Eyed Waifs," that were so popular during the Sixties, and which I could not stand.  But they sold, like hot cakes.  Maybe this success was the beginning of the decline of artistic standards in this country.

                                      The movie does not bother to examine that.  Instead, it examines Margaret, a woman of low self-esteem, who, in a time span from 1958 to 1986, rises to the occasion, to take charge of herself. This is fundamentally what the film is about, and AMY nails it every step of the way.

                                        "Big Eyes" starts with Margaret walking out, with her young daughter, on her Southern California husband and marriage, never named.  She tries to eke out a living--which men in job authority just would not accept from a woman back in this era.  Margaret winds up in the San Francisco Art Scene, painting and selling her work in parks, where she meets, and marries, Walter Keane, a dangerous charmer, in 1955.  The charmer evolves--all too quickly, as some critics have said, and I agree!!!!--into a raging sociopath and narcissist, who degrades, abuses, and ultimately threatens to kill Margaret and her daughter, Jane.  With all the courage of AMY ADAMS, Margaret walks out on him, in 1964, divorces him in 1965, and moves to Hawaii to start a new life..

                                        The film culminates in the lawsuit and trial Margaret brings against Keane in 1986.  It is all played out too easily, like a TV Movie, but the acting is so compelling one almost does not mind.  Though it is clear Walter Keane is a real nut job, and when I heard he died in 2000, penniless, but embittered (he still felt the credit was due him!!!!!!!!) I was not surprised!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         I wanted to walk up to Walter Keane, and his kind, and smack them across the face!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  You will, too, girls, after seeing this film!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         So see AMY ADAMS in this, then go to the St. Re
gis for Tea!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                          AMY and Tea!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Perfect!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

To Think That This Inspired, To Some Degree, "Into The Woods!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                              I had never heard of "The Teddy Bears' Picnic," until I read a reference to it, ion a recent review of the movie, "Into The Woods."  I had to look it up, to see how it fit this idea, and I have to say, with what I have found, it is easy to say Sondheim may very well have by influenced by this piece, especially in composing and structuring the Opening Prologue to his piece.

                               Of course, I just had to share it with all my girls!  So, here is Anne Murray, whose warm voice gives it a very soothing quality.  Given the lyrics, I can see how performers like Johnny Depp or Gene Wilder could give it a darker twist, which points more toward Sondheim.  I am sure he came across it, while writing "Into The Woods."

                                So, here is Anne Murray's lovely rendering to share with you all, on this, the last day of the month, AND the year, as we begin to wind down!!!!!!!!!!

                                 Happiness, Darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

As Effie Said, In "Dreamgirls," "What About Me???????????????"

                               Darlings, I am telling you, after all those "73 Questions With...........," I began to wonder--what about me?  Why not "73 Questions With The Raving Queen???????????"  Since I was not successful in getting a personal publicist for a Christmas gift, why not allow myself to be interviewed, like AMY and ANNA??????????  If there is anyone who wants to step forward, and singlehandedly interview me, and then get it on YouTube, then let me know.

                                Or--in the meantime--if there is a question you want to ask on here, online, you can do so, and I will answer it as a blog post.  In any case, I have some pretty interesting answers to give, so watch out!  And I am more informative than that Perez Hilton!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  So, film, or ask away!!!!!!!!!!  The Raving Queen is ready, lambs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  Wait!  I have had a publicist all this time, without knowing it!

                                    All requests and questions, must be submitted for approval, to my beloved canine companion--Cujo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere's ANNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                           No sooner had I finished writing about Amy Adams, then I decided to see who else was out there, when, lo and behold, girls, I found "73 Question, With Anna Wintour!"  Which was just too good to pass up, because, having mentioned the possibility of some out there not knowing whom ANNA may be, this is a perfect introduction.  This is ANNA in all her glory--glamour, acidity, and humor!  Yes, humor, darlings!  She really quite is entertaining, and even has a sense of humor about herself!

                           So, take a look, and enjoy.  But it makes me yearn for other sessions, like "73 Questions With MERYL STREEP?"  Not to mention "73 Questions With HAYLEY MILLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!"   How I would love to ask those!

                             And what about "73 Questions With The Raving Queen?"  Huh?  More on that, later!!!!!!!!!!!!

                               Anna is  simply a delight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                I LOVE YOU, ANNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

New Year's Ball To Drop, From Parachute Jump, At Coney Island!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                          Starting this year, darlings, a tradition of sorts will be established for Brooklynites, or those who do not want to go traipsing all the way in to Times Square on New Year's Eve!  Count me in, there!

                           A light show, and ball drop, at the Parachute Jump is going to take place, and, sweeties, I wish I could be there.  The idea behind this seems to be that since the following day, January 1 (also my beloved's birthday) marks another annual tradition--the Polar Bears Club members diving into the freezing ocean!!!!!!!!!--why not have one, the night before???????????

                          I'd be game, but I much prefer staying in my neighborhood, with my beloved and others, having a quiet evening.  I cannot help wonder how huge a a crowd will be drawn; certainly nothing like Times Square, but even if this turns out to be the Winter equivalent of the Mermaid Parade, that is a pretty dense crowd, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                           I am sure there will be media coverage, and, if I can get any, I will be sure to download.

                            Meanwhile, I can't help but asking all my girls that timely question--

                            "What are you dooooooooooooing, New Year's?
                              New Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaar's Evvvvvvvvvvvvvve!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                               Have a happy, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

50 Years Ago, Today, Girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            I cannot believe today marks half a century I got, and wore, my first pair of eye glasses.  I was in fourth grade, then, with that Norma Brodsky--oh, my God, darlings; she must, by now be an old harridan of 75!!!!!!--and they weren't nearly as stylish as what is out there today.  They were those sort of tortoise shell top, but clear bottom, frames that a lot of boys wore back in the day, making them look like mini nerds, or future adult ones, at NASA during the 1950's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             Since then, I have gone through at least six other pairs.  I am currently wearing what I call my "Stephanie March Glasses;" just watch any 'SVU featuring Stephanie as Alex Cabot, and you will see what I mean.  I feel empowered, when I wear them; just like Stephanie!

                              Back in the late 80's, when Patti Lu Pone was doing "Anything Goes" at the Beaumont, she had on a pair or red horned rims in a Times article, so I wore "Patti Lu Pone  Glasses," for awhile!!!!!!!!!

                               It's amazing how well my eyes have held up, so far, with all the reading I do.  Not to mention writing this blog.  Before wearing glasses, I was desperate to do so; I thought they made you look intelligent, and that everyone who wore them was that.

                               Well, I was a fraction right, at least.  But here I am, at another milestone, and it feels great!

                                Now, if I could only have Stephanie's hair, to match my glasses!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, December 29, 2014

Even Before Hitchcock Got His Hands On Them, Birds Were Pretty Nasty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            Now, I have nothing against our feathered friends, loves.  One of our best friends here, which you have heard me mention, is Pete, The Pigeon.  I have not seen Pete for awhile; I am guessing, being a pigeon of distinction, that he has gone South, for the Winter.

                            Such random thoughts began passing through my mind, as I watched "Into The Woods."  I was thrilled when the birds pecked out the eyes of Cinderella's Stepmother and Stepsisters, which led me to Alfred Hitchcock, and then the old Mother Goose rhyme, "Sing A Song Of Sixpence."

                             You remember, darlings--

                              "Sing a song of sixpence, a pocket full of rye.
                                Four and twenty blackbirds, baked in a pie.
                                When the pie was open, the birds began to sing.
                                Wasn't that a dainty dish to set before the King?

                                 The King was in the counting house, counting out his money..
                                 The Queen was in the parlor, eating bread and honey.
                                 The Maid was in the garden, hanging out the clothes.
                                 When along came a blackbird, and tweaked off her nose."

                             I think the actual word is "pecked," but I somehow remember it being "tweaked."  Besides, I prefer the sound of that word, anyway.  Now, I can hear some exclaiming over how The Raving Queen could be so daring to rewrite Mother Goose.  Well, why not?  I am sure I am not the first, and besides, as I often claim, I am a lot more informed than that Perez Hilton.  He just does the old Blanche Du Bois act, giving truth, in the form of illusion.  I give illusion, in the form of truth.   Blanche always said she did not want reality, but magic!  Well, here, hons, you get the magic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             Getting back to the rhyme, and looking over the text, I had to sigh.  Once again, as with so much of nineteenth century literature, it is all about social class!!!!!!!!!!   Why is it that the poor maid has to get her nose tweaked?  Why not the fat, overindulgent Queen, who is only whittling away time, sitting in that parlor, eating the bread and honey?????????  At least, with "Into The Woods," (and the original Grimm Brothers) those snotty upper crust Stepsisters got their due.  But in Mother Goose?  It does not pay to be lower class; the maid here, The Old Woman Who Lived In A Shoe; even Pretty Bobby Shaftoe, floating on his raft!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            I am telling you, girls, it doesn't pay to hail from the wrong side of the tracks!   Those who remain, get thee from there as soon as possible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            Goat Alley does not have to last forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, We Have All Got To Stretch, Like Amy Adams!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 Let this be one of our goals for 2015, darlings!  I just happened to catch this inspirational, and glamorous, short video documentary on YouTube called "73 Questions Witb Amy Adams."  It was shot in a ballet studio, within the Conde Nast empire, prior to Amy doing a photo shoot, with ANNA, for VOGUE.  You all know who ANNA is, of course.  If any of you don't, let me know, because maybe it is a time for me to write an alphabetical glossary of names and terms that turn up most often on this blog.

                             Amy answers all questions, including several from some little girls, with the graciousness and charm that is so typical of her!

                               But, while she does, she also does some stretches and ballet moves that are just unbelievable.  I am sure her dance training is part of it, but I cannot wonder if having a vagina helps, too, because there are some splits and stretches she does I cannot imagine doing, even if I were fifty pounds lighter and more lithe.

                                Amy says her best way to unwind and decompress is through Yoga.  So, let that be our start, girls.  We are going to do some Yoga--even 10 minutes, for a start, would help, and then some brief power walking to where we built up to the Summer of 2013, when I actually lost 8 pounds!  Only, now I can go for more!

                                But words can only go so far!  So, watch Amy doing her exercises and be inspired!  It's what we all want to be, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   At least I do!  Some of you girls may be at the Amy point already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   Happy Stretching!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, December 28, 2014

Darlings, Wait Till You See MERYL Scaling The Walls Of The Castle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                              And when lightning bolts fly from her fingers, and make fields of thorns, it is not special effects doing this, but MERYL, for real, because she is, well,......MERYL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                               Which is by way of saying I found the film version of "Into The Woods" acceptable.  Oh, I know, it does not begin to equal the perfection of the 1987 Broadway original.  The introductory music was sped up too fast, and the timing of it with the narrator's opening, "Once upon a time..." was off; the songs, "Maybe They're Really Magic," (which I love!) and the brilliant, moving "No More" (which  is to this show what "Our Time" is to 'Merrily'!!!!!!!!!!) have been eliminated, Rapunzel does not die, the ending is off, and, in one sequence during the Festival, strains of the 'Night Music' score are heard.   And the first act finale, "Happily Ever After" only gets a brief instrumentation.  As a Theater Queen and purist, you really did not expect me to just dismiss these imperfections, did you?????????

                                 That said, I was so surprised by how much was retained, how well cast and sung it all was, that I am going to go out on a limb and say that, despite imperfections, "Into The Woods" is to date the best film adaptation of a Sondheim musical.  Better than that awful "Sweeney Todd," I can tell you, which butchered a brilliant score!!!!!!!!!!!  Butchered!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  Why is this film so good?  Because the actors, for a change, are not overpowered by the special effects.

                                     With each role, MERYL just keeps revealing how DIVINE she is!  I cried real tears, darlings, over her moving rendition of "Stay," and her climactic "Last Midnight" is a true film show stopper that had the audience applauding.

                                      MERYL, along with Emily Blunt and James Corden, are the heart and soul of the  movie.  The couple, the Baker and his Wife, are absolutely heart rending.  Emily Blunt is a revelation, with her singing and musical timing, and she brings a dramatic intensity to the part that compliments Mr. Corden's poignant work.  I was amazed at how much of the score was left in--"Giants In The Sky," marvelously sung by Daniel Huddlestone, as Jack.  You may remember him, darlings, from two years ago, as Gavroche in the film version of "Les Miserables!!!!!!!!!"  There may have been some lyric adjustments to "On The Steps Of The Palace," but the climax is retained,and Anna Kendrick, as Cinderella, renders it superbly, though I could not help wishing for either Jessie Mueller or Amy Adams!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     The Giant, who was never seen on stage, is visible here, in the person of Frances de la Tour.  Now, during the 1987 original, which was a different time, it was said that the Giant in the show was a metaphor for AIDS.  That has changed; now I think she is a metaphor for Anna Wintour!!!!!!!!!!  Who would be pretty impressed with the costumes, especially MERYL's, when she transforms into the Glam Witch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      Lilla Crawford, Broadway's recent original Annie, is a superb Red Riding Hood, and sings beautifully.  Her song is retained, but am I the only one who noticed that, minus the cape, the cut and style of her dress, plus her hairstyle, becomes almost a visual homage to Judy Garland as Dorothy in "The Wizard Of Oz?"  I wonder if that was intentional, or not?????????????

                                     It is not to die for, darlings, but it is to be seen!  Oh, and Tammy Blanchard, as one of the Stepsisters, and Christine Baranski as the Stepmother are perfectly cast--someone was watching over this film, to see that things were done as right as they could be.  And they have!

                                     Not to mention, my new favorite line from the show--

                                     "Hurry up, and do my hair, Cinderella; are you really wearing THAT???????????????"

                                       And for MERYL worshipers, here she is  with "Last Midnight!!!!!!!!!!"  Simply brilliant, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Saturday, December 27, 2014

Neil Patrick Harris Is Coming To "American Horror Story!!!!!!!!!!!!" Will Justice Be Meted Soon????????????????

                           Poor Neil Patrick Harris.  He tries SO hard--and that is his problem.  I can see this  effort in all  his work.  But, where is the spontaneity, the spark of discovery, that marks a true actor, ceasing to be an actor, and becoming....the character???????????

                             I never get this from Neil; as a result, I just don't quite believe him.  Even as Bobby in "Company," he just wasn't there. Whereas Martha Plimpton....oh, my God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             So, I imagine it will be the same, from Neil, on this show.  But, maybe some justice will happen
                              Which brings me to Grace Gummer, as Lizard Girl!!!!!!!!  Oh, Gracie, what must your mother think?????????  I can hear her watching you on this, and moaning, "I raised you right," and you play a lizard????????????"  One would think being MERYL's daughter would get better roles.  Poor MERYL!!!!!!!!!   A mother does the best for her children, and look what can happen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                But Lizard Girl is pretty volatile, so she may be there for a reason.  Maybe Del and Spencer's dicks will get devoured by her lizard teeth!!!!!!!!!!  Maybe Lillian Hemmings will get her comeuppance from this creature.  Come on, Grace, help us out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   And make your Mother proud of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   I can't wait to see what happens, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joycie, Baby, How Could You Do A Number On Me?????????????

                                       I really wanted to read "The Corn Maiden," which is a brilliant psychological exploration of childhood bullying, with a shocking twist!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  But I also wanted to read the other six stories in the book; in the end, I read only a total of four.

                                       "The Corn Maiden" is the first and titled story of the collection.  It was followed by "Beersheba," which was fine, though a big comedown from the first story, which turns out to be the best.  But, when I got to "Nobody Knows My Name," something went wrong.  First, I am reading this engaging tale of two sisters, then suddenly, I veer from page 178 to 211, and am in a tale about twisted twin brothers.  No, not like "The Other;" more Hitchcockian, and grounded in reality.  Then, after a certain point, the book goes back to the page 211 sequence, again.  As a result, I missed half of "Nobody Knows My Name,"
all of "Fossil Figures," and half of "Death-Cup."  Thank God "Helping Hands" and "A Hole In The Head," which were fabulous, rounded things out.

                                        So, basically, I read a seven story collection that had only four stories.  Joycie, how could you do this to me????????  Me, The Raving Queen????????  At first, I thought it was one of your Carol Oates literary tricks, but even you could not be so scattered.  You are a Structure Queen, dear.

                                         I want to know what happened to those other stories.  And what happens in them!!!!!!!!!   Joycie, baby, you better send me a free, complete copy of this book!  I demand it!

                                          And future readers of this book, examine it, before purchasing it or checking it out, to see if it is complete!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                           Come on, Joyce!  Get with the program!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Naomi Grossberg Goes For The Emmy Gold In AHS' "Orphans"

                             It seems every season of "American Horror Story has an episode that is the highlight of the season.  With "Asylum," it was clearly "The Name Game," where it was discovered Sarah Paulson could really dance.  With "Freak Show," it is "Orphans," where the focus is on perhaps the show's most beloved character, Pepper.  Naomi Grossberg has always been brilliant, and a delight, as Pepper, but with the focus on her here, she rises to the level of Emmy gold.  Sher  should get one, if there is any justice.  I am telling you, if she was watching, MERYL STREEP would be impressed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            Salty dies, having outlived the lifespan of a pinhead, and Pepper is inconsolable.  So, Elsa concludes something must be done about her--for her own good.  It is decided to send her back to her sister, Rita Gayheart (Mare Winngham) and her husband, Larry (Matthew Glave).  This turns out to be a mistake, for the House of Gayheart is worse than the Freak Show or the Asylum.  Sister Rita is a loser alcoholic, who gives birth to a baby boy, afflicted, just like Pepper.  Rita refuses to bond with the child, continues drinking, so Pepper takes care of the poor soul.  The whole story of Pepper's abandonment,being found in the orphanage, where her sister abandons her, by Elsa, to become her "first monster" in starting her freak show, will tear at the heart, thanks to Naomi Grossberg's performance.  This episode, too, makes it clear why the Gayhearts are a couple who, like Dr. Arthur Arden (James Cromwell) deserve to be tied down, and rolled, still alive, into a flaming crematorium, en route to their own Hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                            Pepper's next big moment comes when we learn the truth of what happened to her infant nephew.  Having Pepper in the house is bad enough, but knowing their own child is the same is something the Gayhearts cannot stand, so they plot to get rid of it.  One day, Rita leaves the house, and Pepper is caring for the child.  Suddenly, Larry walks into the room, grabs the child away from Pepper, tosses her out, and locks the door!  Pepper is furiously banging on the door, hearing the piteous cries of the baby, knowing something bad is happening to it.  She wants to save it, but is powerless to do so.

                            When Rita returns home, Larry claims Pepper drowned the baby and dismembered its ears.  Who is going to believe poor Pepper?  Which is how she ends up at Briarcliff  Sanitarium, and in the hands of Sister Mary Eunice, who takes a liking to Pepper, and makes for a spectacular acting return by Lily Rabe.

                               "Orphan s" is the most heartbreaking episode in this segment.  I am crying for Justice for Pepper, and I hope the Gayhearts get what they deserve!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  And poor Salty is now on display with Ma Petite!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  That bitch, Lillian Hemmings, has it coming to her, too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, My God, Did You See It, Girls?????????? Amy Adams Hosting "Saturday Night Live!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Amy Adams!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                             It had to happen sometime, loves, and what better time than Christmas.  Amy Adams, who I have been hoping would eventually host SNL, finally got her chance last Saturday, when she hosted their Christmas show!!!!!!!!!!!

                              I have to wonder--if they finally manged to land OUR AMY, can the DIVINE MERYL be far behind????????????  Or HAYLEY MILLS???????????????????????

                              Amy was just stunning.  Her hair was perfect--I mean, it's Amy Adams, what else could be expected?????????--her outfit showed her to best advantage, and her voice was glorious as she and the cast sang one of MY favorites, "We Need A Littler Christmas," from one of MY favorite musicals, "Mame."
I am telling you, Amy, or someone must have been reading this blog, because I don't think that song being chosen was any coincidence!!!!!!!!!

                                But why keep chatting?  Here is Amy, doing her AMY thing!  Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!


Friday, December 26, 2014

Who Needs Christian Mingle?????????????? Even Charles Manson Can Get Married!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   It really is too bad Afton Burton--now known as :"Star," cannot become a singer or actress. With that youngish look and Shelley Plimpton hair style, she could get into a production of "HAIR" and sing "Frank Mills."  Which would be better off than what she is going to do.

                                   You see, for last nine years, since she has been sixteen, she has been corresponding and talking to 20th Century Sicko Charles Manson.  And, on November 7, 2014, Manson took out a marriage license, so the two of then could be wed.  Get this--this makes her his third wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      This should be an inspiration for all spinsters out there--if Charles Manson can find someone, ANYONE who wants to can!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  The 80-year-old satyr is still hot to trot--with a 26-year-old young enough to be his granddaughter!

                                       And speaking of grand kids, one person who endorses this union, and will be at the ceremony, is Manson's grandson, Jason Freeman.  The other is Burton's mother.  My take on her is she is one variation on Jo Van Fleet in "I'll Cry Tomorrow," or, more specifically, Kim Stanley in "Frances." I can picture her egging her daughter on, even slamming her against the wall, like Stanley in the movie, while screaming at her, "Do you know what it's like to be a NOBODY????"  Meaning Mom wants the fame.  Hell, I bet she, too would jump into the sack with Charles.

                                      This more than anything exemplifies the cliche that there is someone for everyone out there.

                                      So, forget about Christian Mingle and E Harmony Match!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This Trio Has Got To Get Their Comeuppance....They Will....and In One Case, I Think I Know How!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                              I know yesterday was Christmas Day, and many of you were busy unwrapping your baubles from Van Cleef And Arpels, but it was also a Thursday, and I would wager more than one of you out there were wondering what happened to Bitch Of The Week.  I actually had a special Christmas Bitch picked out, but that will have to wait till next year, as the day has passed.  So, consider this triple header a sort of belated Christmas gift to all my readers who revel in bitchery!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                               Again, it all comes back to "American Horror Story--Freak Show."  Let's start with Del, The Strongman, played by Michael Chiklis.  He may look hot on the Silver Daddies web site, but come on, he is a troll in the gay arena.  I just love how this show is sneaking homosexuality into it--in 1952, Florida, no less!!!!!-- where gays were strung up as  equally as Blacks.  Still must be, judging from how things are going on, down in Ferguson, and up here on Staten Island!!!!!!!!!   But don't get me started.  As far as Del is concerned, he has found a gay watering hole called "High Noon" (what a hoot!) a couple of towns over, where he goes for solace.  He doesn't get much, because, for starters, look at him, and for another, better looking, and equally evil homos, such as Dandy Mott and Richard Spencer, keep turning up, to ruin his act!!!!!!!!!!  And potentially expose him, which is one way he might get his comeuppance.

                               He cannot be forgiven for the murder of Ma Petite!  He is going to rue the day he did that, and it will happen in one of two ways.  Either he will be exposed for the homosexual that he is (which, in 1952 Florida, is NOT a good thing; even more  then, than now!!!!!!!!!!!) or, as in  a fitting homage to the Todd Browning movie of 1932, "Freaks," he will be hunted down by the others and physically castrated, which was not allowed to be shown in the MGM film, (with him singing "falsetto" at the end!!!!!!) but which I want to see shown here!  And also, lest we forget, Ma Petite, though deceased, could still have a hand in his comeuppance.  This is, after all. "American Horror Story," dears!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                    Then, there is Richard Spencer, the conniving Hollywood agent wannabe, who, in tandem with Daisy (Emma Roberts) is just a pair of grifter out for what he can get.  Daisy is beginning to show signs of empathy with those she is living with, as Fortune Teller Esmeralda; she could not bring herself to kill Ma Petite, and Spencer didn't have the balls to, so her made Daisy do it.  So you both have to give these two credit.

                                    It took me awhile to realize that Denis O'Haire is playing Spencer; at 5'8", they must be shooting his character from specific angles, and with smaller props, to make him seem taller--like MERYL in "Julie and Julia"--because, let me tell you, I have seen Denis O'Haire on stage, and he is not the towering figure that Spencer seems to be.

                                     Now, he has a secret, which is almost every gay man's fantasy, except when actually confronted with it, when it becomes a handicap.  You've heard about the "Irish curse," darlings?
Quite the opposite here!  What am I talking about?  In plain English, dolls, Richard Spencer has a thirteen inch cock--hey, wasn't that what John Homes and Harry Reems were supposed to have had???????--and every time a hustler is confronted with sucking it they...well...gag!!!!!!!!!!!!!   You can bet he hangs out at "High Noon," too, and is just pure evil; he may not have had it in him to kill Ma Petite, but  he would eliminate just about everyone else.  And that includes Daisy, whose fate I am beginning to worry about.  But,  have no fear, with his moustache, which he practically twirls in silent movie fashion, Mr. O'Haire's Spencer is too villain extraordinaire not to get a comeuppance.  And you know what it is going to be.  Either he will be killed and exhibited bodily, with his enormous member, or it will simply get cut off!  Good riddance, either way!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                     Which brings us to our third contender, Lillian Hemmings, the curator of The Museum Of Morbidity.  Butter wouldn't melt in this bitch's mouth, brilliantly played by the great Celia Weston.
I can't be sure if she has killed anyone, but she is not above taking murdered goods--whether she knows or not.  Lillian is your typical female curatorial type--and have I known them in my day, darlings!!!!!!!!--manipulative and controlling--at least those they are able to--with no scruples about how they acquire their.....acquisitions.  Lillian is due for a comeuppance, which I think is going to be a homage to that of Olga Baclanova in "Freaks"--something is going to happen to her, where she goes from Museum Curator to Featured Attraction!!!!!!!!!!!!   A fitting end, wouldn't you say???????????????????

                                      One last thing.  That Del is not much of a strong man.  We all know that Jimmy, the Lobster Boy (played by  the marvelous  Evan Peters) is the son of Del and Ethel, The Bearded Lady, wonderfully played by Kathy Bates.  But, then, when isn't she wonderful?  Well, let me tell you something about Jimmy's conception, which this show may or not may not reveal.  Ethel is a good deal butcher than Del, and I am sure, during whatever passion they were aroused to, (which was a mistake) Ethel tied a huge dildo around herself, threw Del down on the bed...and fucked him royally.  Or, maybe Ethel and Del are also hermaphrodites!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  In any case, nine months later, it was Del not Ethel, who pooped Jimmy out of his male vagina!!!!!!!!!!

                                      Ouch!!!!!!!!!!!!  Those claws must have hurt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                      So, there you have it, girls....three Bitches for the price of one!  I cannot wait for us all  to dish  about the fates they are meted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                       Kisses, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!