Should I Throw Myself A Pity Party??????????? Some Words, And Ideas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  So, darlings, what prompted this?  I know, for

some readers, this will come out of nowhere, and I haven't even thought of pity parties since my shitty adolescence, which was nothing but one big pity party.

But here is what happened.

For years, I have been in a book group that meets sporadically.  One of the women in this group--of both men and women--has a lovely daughter, whom I have not seen in years, mostly because of the Covid factor.  However, I knew that she was nearing the age to having a Bat Mitzvah, and I was sort of looking forward to it.  I never got to go back in the day, when I was of age, because all the Jewish kids in school hated me.  So, I was more than looking forward to going to this young lady's Bat Mitzvah.

Except it never happened.  My going, I mean.  As time drew near--the event was last Saturday September 10--I awaited my invitation.  But none came.  It was David who expressed the idea that we were not invited.

And the funny thing was, at first, I was OK with it.  I would have been delighted to receive the invitation alone.  Due to the distance needed to travel to get there, in New Jersey, and we live in Brooklyn, it would have been difficult, but we would have made the effort.  Then there was the Covid factor; of course, David and I would have worn masks, but the event I feared might have been a super spreader.  And from what I heard, with 70 people in attendance, that is what it would have been.  But others I knew who went were cautious, and so would have been David and myself.

But wait!  There is more!  It still bothered me, but I was fine with this, still.  I figured we would see pictures of the ceremony, and the daughter in her dress.  I was looking forward to seeing and hearing all about it.

Well, yesterday, a mutual friend of ours, from the book club, and having been the child's au pair when she was younger, got together with David and I for dinner.  It went well, until the end.  

When I asked to see pictures, she responded weirdly, saying they were not ready yet. Instead, she showed me photo slides of she and the mother gag posing in some ersatz photo booth.  They both looked great, which I cannot deny, but David and I thought it was weird about the Bat Mitzvah pics.  Our dinner guest is always quick on the draw to show others.  Why not these?

That prickled.  But what got me hurt, and to the point where I am writing this now, was that David asked if other members of our book club had been asked. and we were shocked to learn every one of them had been--except us!

David was pissed, but I was devastated.  I still have tears behind my eyes and feel like I have been punched in the stomach, because of hurt feelings.  Like I said, not since my shitty adolescence, darlings!!!!!!!!!

And so here I sit, writing this.  Now, what can I do about it?

I feel I need to do something to show this mother that I am as good as anyone else who attended the service and soiree.  But what?

Well, let's get back to the pity party.  There are two variations on this.

One, is that I get dressed, go to the market, buy some sweet things I really should not eat, and consume them, until I get sick.  That will take care of things!  That will show her what she has done to me!

By the way, if you can't tell, darlings, I am ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just how angry?  I am contemplating resigning from the book club, and I have the feeling now, that save for David, I cannot trust anyone again, let alone these people.  Added to which, over the years we have invited mother and daughter to events of ours.  But she always came up with an excuse not to come.  So, I am supposed to accept all this lightly?  I think not!

The other thing is to do something big that I want to do this weekend and not include anyone.  Maybe a Broadway or even Off-Broadway show!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Or how about this--we fly to New Orleans for the weekend, gorge ourselves on lunch at Galatoire's, go back to the Hotel Monteleone and take a nap, maybe see a ghost, then to Antoine's for dinner, which will be followed by a sumptuous desert--probably Baked Alaska-- followed by Cafe Diablo!  Two cups of that will knock me out, for sure!

Traveling there would show them all up!  NOLA is certainly more party driven than New Jersey, which, by the way, was the state I sought escape from ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!!  And have not regretted it!

So, readers, what do you think of my pity party choices?

Oh, and there is something else.

This situation could be ameliorated simply.  But certain things would have to happen.

An apology from the daughter's mother.

An invite at a subsequent date to a post-Bat Mitzvah celebration, with mother, daughter, and some of the family members I know.

An invite in December to the annual Hanukah party.  I have missed a couple, but how I would love to go!

A personal invite and tour of her new lakeside place.

But I doubt these would happen, because the mother is not capable of being the bigger person, and is too selfish and self-absorbed to consider how I might feel

Now about this invitation.  I am tempted to send one to the mother, stating that the event is a Pity Party, and the date is As Soon As She Opens The Envelope!

Oh, and here is some visual help, darlings!

                                                                                      

                                       See you in my head at my party, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!