On Monday Evening, We Saw "TEETH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

                             I am sure many on here know the trajectory of this show; for those who may not, let me offer an explanation.

                               This is a musical version of a 2007 film of the same title, which I saw back in the day.  It was directed by Mitchell Lichtenstein, the son of Roy Lichtenstein.  Like the film, the musical is about a young girl named Dawn O'Keefe, who suffers from a condition called "vagina dentata," thereby ruining her chances for intimacy.

                                 The movie was witty and understated, for a film of this subject.

                                 The musical, which moved from Playwrights Horizons to New World Stages is as in your face and vulgar as can be.  Andy Karl plays the kind of pastor one associates with Christian phoniness, and the story is given a Christian agenda, which it never had, and which I objected to.  Then we get the vulgarity of dozens of penises on strings falling from the sky by way of the theater ceiling.  What the hell is this?

                                     Kyra Kennedy plays Dawn, with as lackluster a manner as any of her players.  The music, which is loud and raucous, did absolutely nothing for me.  The costumes were merely functional.  And the underratedness of the film is missing because the creators forsake the film and fill the story with phony Christian political correctness.  Darlings, if you want Christmas correctness, go see the Rockettes.  Because I am telling you, the Living Nativity is so spectacular I don't think the real thing could have been better staged.

                                       However, everyone around us was going crazy with joy.  This show has some demographic that obviously draws repeat viewers, but I could not fathom it.  I felt we were on the outside looking in.

                                       Sarah Benson directed this mess.  I never heard of her, and don't expect to.  Why?  Because she took a unique property, did away with it, and made it into her own politically correct agenda.  What a load of crap!

                                           "TEETH" will have you gritting yours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!