Darlings, Once You Have Sat Through "American Idiot, You Realize What A Genius Bonnie Tyler Was!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I must be feeling my age, girls, because last night, while watching "American Idiot" at the St James Theatre, the Gerneration Gap came full circle, because, while I am not a parent, I now understand what my poor father had to go through back in 1969, sitting with me through the movie "Woodstock." By the time I left the theater, my ears were throbbing, and I was desperate for curling under my comforter with a cup of a tea and a novel, even if--God forbid!--it was Barbara Taylor Bradford!!!! You see what this show did to me, loves? It sent me back to Barbara Taylor Bradford!!!!!!

Now, no one loves a bitchfest more than moi, girls, and those of you who have followed along on here know how bitchy I can get. I mean, yeah!!!! BUT bitchfests, and bitching in general, have to be about something, and then you have to make your receptors UNDERSTAND what it is you are bitching about. Which the makers of this show fail to do, because the music has been amped up SO MUCH that during the ensemble numbers you cannot understand a single word. The cast is young, some, I mean the guys, are rather cute, but so what, when you can not make heads or tails of the material. All of these kids are talented; they'd be better showcasing it in "Annie" instead of this!!!!! The whole intermissionless evening (and thank God only 90 minutes!) is one screaming, jumping up and down session about parental misunderstanding, running away from home, and then, aw shucks, we can't hack it in the outside world, so let's go home!!!!! I mean, "The Wizard of Oz" was more sophisticated than this--and has inspired generations. This only inspires a mass exodus when the show is over, though let me tell you, darlings, this got a STANDING OVATION from the audience!!!!! Well, hell, they would ovate a trained seal. But in this case, sweethearts--the TRAINED SEAL WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Still, there was one nice song, "Wake Me Up When September Ends" that shows there is potential here, and another, "21 Guns" that reminded me of "Three-Five-Zero-Zero" from "HAIR." Except "HAIR" did it better.

To think of those poor ghosts lurking about the St James Theatre, where so many classics have premiered, who must be hanging their heads in shame over this. One can hope it will beat a hasty retreat, but I do not think so, not only because it is the HOTTEST tkt on Broadway, but I would not be surprised if the TONY voters, thinking this is so NOW, vote it "Best Musical". Michael Reidel, can you hear me???????????? Helppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It makes you realize what a genius Bonnie Tyler is. If only her music video of "Total Eclipse Of The Heart" had been put on the musical stage! Now there is a SHOW!!! With lyrics!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, I need a total eclipse of the heart myself, but, who knows, it could be on the way. I have to be cagey for now, but when the time is right, I will shed light on all this mystery!!!!

But do yourselves a favor and save money--do not see "American Idiot." Though the REAL AI's are the ones who think it is great!!!!!!

"Mother of Mercy! Is this the end of Rico?" It could be the end of musical theater!!!!!!!!!!!!

Help me, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!