Girls, What Is Culture Coming To????????????

List time, again, darlings!!!!!!! Earlier this week, the New York Times posted their list of the Ten Best Books Of 2011, and let me tell you it is a stunner!!!!!!

Fiction

1. The Art Of Fielding, by Chad Harbach
2. 11/22/63, by Stephen King
3. Swamplandia!, by Karen Russell
4. Ten Thousand Saints, by Eleanor Henderson
5. The Tiger's Wife, by Tea Obreht

Non-Fiction
1.Arguably, by Christopher Hitchens
2 The Boy In The Moon, by Ian Brown
3.Malcom X: A Life In Reinvention, by Manning Marable
4 Thinking Fast And Slow, by Daniel Kaheman
5.A World On Fire, by Amanda Foreman

Just a couple of things I want to say about the Non-Fiction, loves!!!!!!!
First, I printed it for the benefit of all my girls, who want a COMPLETE rendering of the Times list, because you all know how much I REALLY care about Non-Fiction, as opposed to Fiction, which, darlings, you KNOW I care about!!!!! Second, congratulations to the books and the authors who DID make it!!!!!!!! And last, but not least--HA!HA!--I am telling you, Joan Didion must be ROYALLY PISSED right now!!!!! Ever since this list came out, I am sure she has been smoking those cigs and belting back that Scotch in a manner that outdoes even she, because you just know she is fuming that her book, "Blue Nights," was not put on the list!!!!!!!!! Tough luck, Joan!!!!!!!!! What are you going to do, now???????? I hear they need a Fag Hag barmaid over at Julius'. You'll fit right in there, dear!
Fag Hag Archival Thief Lee Israel hangs out there with all her boys/minions, while the bartenders are usually bombed out of their minds, anyway, so they won't even noticed how soused you are, Joan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Cheers, darling!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, remember when I wrote about the 100 Most Notable Books? I came up with a Hypothetical List of 6 of what I thought would make the Top Ten. Let's see how I did-- 1.The Art Of Fielding, by Chad Harbach
2.The Marriage Plot, by Jeffrey Eugenides
3.1Q84, by Haruki Marakami
4.The Cat's Table, by Michael Ondatje
5.This Beautiful Life, by Helen Schulman
6.Blue Nights, by Joan Didion

As it turns out, I did rather poorly. You've heard me on Joan!!!!!!! But only ONE book on MY list made it--"The Art Of Fielding." Which I am very happy about. And not all the books on my Hypothetical List were ones I was hoping would get on; believe me, I am happy "The Cat's Table" and "This Beautiful Life" (which was terribly disappointing) did not get on the list. But, as it turns out, I read three of the books that did-- 1.The Art Of Fielding, by Chad Harbach
2.Swamplandia!, by Karen Russell
3. The Tiger's Wife, by Tea Obreht

All three of these were rather good, though I am not sure I would have included 2 and 3 on my REAL list!!!!!!!! And how about Ann Patchett's "State OF Wonder?" It appears nowhere; at least it was better and had more emotional resonance than "The Night Circus" by Erin Morgenstern. But, darlings--Stephen King??????????
On the Ten Best list?????????????? What is the world coming to???????????????????
I have not read anything of his since "Needful Things" (I cannot count "Lisa's Story", as it was so God-awful I could not get past page 50!!), and I am not about to start now!!!!! And where the Hell is Jeffrey Eugenides' "The Marriage Plot?" Easily the best work of Fiction this year; had it not appeared, Harbach's book would have won my endorsement for that title. But, alas, Eugenides did publish this year, so his, for me is the Book Of The Year!

And what the hell is "Ten Thousand Saints"? And who is Eleanor Henderson, and why has no one ever heard of her?????? Or will, again????????????

Go ahead, dolls, blast me on any of this; you know I LOVE a good, old-fashioned Bitchfest!!!!!!!! But you have to wonder what is getting into The Times, when they put Stephen King on a "Best Of Year" list. Who is next, Danielle Steel????? And who is on the book reading/reviewing staff of the Times, these days?????? Hey, dolls, are you tired and exhausted?????? Send a few manuscripts my way; I will be all too happy to read and improve the overall quality of the list!!!!!!!!!!!

But that is This Year. There is always Next Year, and hope for improvement!!!!!!!!!

Wishing you another New Year Of Happy Reading, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!