Horrors, Darlings!!!!!! Thugs At Three Lives!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, I am telling you, what is the world coming to??? Time was when no one would steal book matter from you. I remember a time--about 15 years ago-- when I had drawn some cash from my checking account, and had left the book I was reading (which was "Manchu" by Robert S. Elegant, author of "Dynasty", which I just LOVED!!!! I was still in my "sagas" phase, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!) on the rim of the bank screen at the cash machine. I was several blocks before I realized this, and when I went back, the book, thankfully, was still there.

The theft I will now mention, darlings, did not involve books, but it took place at the city's most prestigious and literary store!!!!!!!!!!!!

On Friday,I walked into Three Lives Bookstore, where Media Star Carol, and the Enchanting Ryan were hard at work. I had come to bitch--about the Times list, and my recent experience at the Strand, when this porky guy dressed in black walked in, who turned out to be a plain clothes cop!!!!!!!!!! To my horror, I learned, that, earlier in the day, Toby, Three Live' wonderful, affable owner, who has been fictionalized in at least two of Julia Glass' books, had been robbed of his I-phone!!!!! It seems he last saw it behind the desk, where no one can really get at it, without being mistaken for a grade-A thief!!!!!!! Even Lee Israel, who IS a grade-A thief, would have found this challenging. Ryan stated he was unpacking boxes right by the desk, so the thieves would have had to get past him. There was no way they could without being spotted by Ryan!!! One wonders how the phone was abducted; unless Toby had it in his pocket, and was picked. Shades of Charles Dickens!!!! A lost art form is returning to contemporary society, in this era of spiralling economics?????

Nevertheless, the attendant cop had good news. The two thugs were pursued, and have apparently been making a practice of ripping off places in this neighborhood. They were apprehended somewhere in the Houston Street area, and Toby, at the time I was there, was at the precinct, getting back his phone, and filling out papers!!!!!!!!!!!

Can you believe this???? I walk into the store to diss on literature, and I step into a "Law And Order" episode!!!!!! All some writer has to do is add one of the perps being found dead and sodomized, and you have a recipe for 'SVU'. Darlings, wouldn't we love to be extras in the store, when Mariska and Company come filming???? You can bet I will have to get my hair done, that day!!!!!!!!!

But robbing Toby????????? And in a bookstore????????? You can bet these guys don't read, so, in addition to doing time, I think they should be assigned time in the prison library, have a reading list drawn up of the most difficult literature extant (James Joyce, Thomas Pychon, for starters!!!) and made to read it until they reach at least a GLIMMER of understanding!!!!!!!!!!

In which case, girls, they will be serving Life Terms!!!!!!!!!!!