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Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Oh, Those Brooklyn Babes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                               You know what they say, lambs--you can't make this shit up!!!!!!!!  Monday night, Monsieur and I decided to eat lightly, with a simple meal at the Lighthouse Cafe, that haven for us in Bay Ridge, where everyone is so friendly.

                                 Our meal was superb, as always. But the clientele was something else.  First, there was this gay hating, Jew hating couple seated next to us, arguing over the price of everything, tormenting the poor waitress.  The woman handled the waitress, while the husband kept giving us homophobic glances in our direction.  I should have winked  at him, and puckered my lips, but, honeys, he was just too ugly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  His wife was a scold; if the Narrows Community Players decide to mount a production of "The Shrike," she would be perfect for the part!!!!!!!!  Because after the waitress walked away, that woman went up to her behind the counter, where, trapped, she hounded her mercilessly.  Who does she think she is???????  If she wants to eat free, go to a church that runs a soup kitchen!!!!!!!!!!

                                 But the best were sitting behind us, a group I can only call the Brooklyn Babes!!!!!!!  Oh, my God, they were not from Miss Porter's!!!!!!!!  They were not even, I think, from Bay Ridge.  I don't know where they were from, but they were loud!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   You know the type, loves.  Hair that has not been natural in decades it's a wonder there is any left, leather jackets, and the foulest mouths this side of "Glengarry Glen Ross."  Here's a sampling--

                                 "I may live in a sheluth, but I know what I'm doin'!!
                                "Yuh leff yuh husband!
                                 "Big Matt ain't no good, he don't know nothin'!  And
                                  my daughtuh!!!!!!!!  I do everythin' fuh dat girl an' she
                                  is a fuckin' unappreciative bitch!  Yuh want diapuhs fer
                                  duh baby???????  Go tuh duh local welfare office!"

                                 I kid you not!!!!!!!!!!  We had to listen this for a good portion of our meal.  I can only imagine where they were headed after the Lighthouse; how did they find their way there, anyway?
And it was absolutely amazing that the woman pronounced "unappreciative" correctly!  I was shocked, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  These were real, hardcore Brooklyn babes!  I just hope I don't run into them, when it is dark, the streets are deserted, and I am walking down one of them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                    This trio would give the gals at Henrietta's Hudson a run for their money!!!!!!!!!!!!

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