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Darlings, before we get to the above, let me tell you last night we had a simply fabulous night on the town under the kileg lights of Broadway at a preveiwe performance of Donald Margulies' new play, "Time Stands Still," starring the fabulous as always Laura Linney, and backed up by an interesting cast including Brian D'Arcy James (first time seeing him in a non-musical, loves!), Eric Bogosian (yes, girls, the playwright, acting, and he was pretty good), and Alicia Silverstone, who surprised me by seeming to understand what she was doing onstage!!!! A good time was had by all, loves, and I wore my designer sweater, darlings!!!!
Now let me tell you. Just when you think there is nothing to write about, along comes material. And that material is a bit of controversey. It seems one of my entries "What Accounts For Things, I Wonder?" back in August, has aroused some ire among some readers, who made this clear outside of here. I welcomed their comments, though I wish they had commented on such here--that is what all this is for, loves--but now it is time for me to set the record straight!!!!!!!!!!
So here goes:
What I say on here I have a perfect right to say. No one is to question MY brilliance or the Oracle that is this blog!!!! I am fabulous, darlings, because I AM fabulous, I was BORN fabulous, and there is nothing anyone can do about it. Can you believe some bitch had the nerve to say "Quel domage?" to ME, in reference to Park Avenue? Listen, bitch, don't "Quel domage!" me, or I will "Quel domage!" you! For your information, Missy, I know a lot more about Park Avenue, than you do, because, while I may not reside there, I know and have visited others who do, so I have been along that thoroughfare longer than you probably have been in your trashy park trailer, with your overweight, tattooed, beer guzzling, motorcycle boyfriend who simultaneously beats you and paws at your panties, treating you like the slut you are! Two couch potatoes watching low class TV shows, and you try to tell ME about Park Avenue!!!! Get your nails done, sweetie, because you would never pass muster at Miss Porter's!!!!!
Another reader--and this bothered me more than Miss Park Avenue--could not understand my cursive writing story, thought I was inventing a Tolkeinesque alpahab et. To be fair, girls, let me be clear here. At the time, darlings--first grade--even I had not read Tolkein yet--but what I was doing was trying to simulate handwriting as best I could, having not yet learned the handwriting alphapbet. So I used block print, joined letters together with lines, to illustrate that I was trying to connect letters together, the way cursive does, and the dumb bitch teacher does not grasp this. Well, fuck her, and fuck you, bitch, for being as stupid as she in not understanding this?
What else? Oh, yes, about Honor Society--one reader said there are plenty of honors for those in choir, newpaper, Drama, etc, and they ARE right about that. And I DID recieve some of those honors. But my point was I had the grades AND the activities necessary, I was judged eligible for consideration, but for other reasons was exluded from what should have been mine.
Bitches, who the hell are you to judge me??? It is MY life, not yours , so FUCK YOU!!!!!
Oh, yes, darlings, other points of clarification. Readers are confused as to whether I am
a HE or a SHE; if you read carefully, darlings, you will note that I am a HE. The thought of me
as heterosexual--horrors!!!!!!!!!!
The other point concerns a reader who insisted if I was so smart I should have been in private school and gone to an Ivy League college. And in theory they too WERE right. But let me explain--while my parents may have misjudged me educationally, they had more than that on their plate to deal with. Because, darlings, I was not a full term infant; I was born two months, premature, spent two weeks in an incubator, getting ready to face my public, darlings, and with that came a myriad of health problems, including a congential heart defect that had to be corrected before puberty, or else you would not be reading this now. So my parents' PRIORTIY was simply keeping me alive, which allowed for other things to slide unattended. It took me years to understand and get over this, but it factors into the equation, girls. As a result, I was sickly, and not the most confident, independent, sort, at the time, so going away to a private school, or even long distance for college was something due to the aforementioned I was simply NOT ready for. And as for the Ivy League, girls, I WAS accepted at Dartmouth, so there, you bitches!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I have covered everything. Except, to get light and consolidate my gay male status, how I would LOVE to have Stanley Tucci come to my house and cook me a meal--in his underwear????
All right, you bitches???? Now you know why I put that quote in the subject bar--I am not afraid to take anyone on, and that includes serial killers. With my life, it is by the grace of God I did not become one. But I love animals, and can't stand blood!!!!!
What do you think of THAT, bitches!!! Have a great weekend, girls!!!!!! Love to all
my darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!
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