Darlings, You Are Not Going To Believe The Connection Between Lana Turner And Evita!!!!!!!!

Bur first, girls, do you know MY connection to Lana Turner? It is tenuous, at best. Around 1963, at the age of eight, I heard the mythic story of her being discovered at Schwaab's Drugstore, sipping a soda at the fountain. Completely disregarding that this establishment was in California in the 30's, I trooped down to the Thrid Avenue Sweet Shop in my hometown, dressed in a pink, cashmere sweater, propped myself up on one of the fountain stools, and began to tear through a series of ice cream sodas. Around the fourth one, the proprietor, asked me what I was doing. when I replied, with all seriousness, that I was trying to get discovered, like Lana Turner, he dropped his jaw, paused, looked at me, then burst out laughing. :Forget it, kid!" he said. "These are on the house; now go home before you make yourself sick!" And so I did.

Now, while reading Patti LuPone's book, it is no surprise that Lana was one of many celeb visitors backstage paying tribute to Patti during the show. With her blonde, aristocratic looks, Lana might have been a contender for the part of Evita herself, at least in a big, gaudy, non-musical Fifties costume film. Anyway, as Patti relates, during the visit, Lana revealed that one time while she was on a trip to Buenos Aires, during the Peron regime, and to attend an Argentinian Film Festival that was common for Hollywooders at the time to attend, she had her passport revoked by Eva Peron, and was taken to her. These two divas faced each other, and Evita graciously gave Lana back her passport, saying "I just wanted to say I modeled my pompadour hairdo after yours!!!!!" Darlings, two international gals come together!!!! Too bad a photographer was not there to post the event for all time. So, darlings, the next time you wear a diamond tiara--Halloween IS coming up, after all--and sing "Don't Cry For Me, Argentina"-- you think about Lana and Eva and what they both did for glamour, girls!!!!!! And you make sure you dress accordingly!!!!!

All sorts of things are happening to keep my girls on edge. Even in the wake of tragedy, the social whirl still goes on, and there is much to report for all my queens out there.

This weekend is Halloween, certainly the most important holiday for all established and aspiring queens. Mine is starting Friday eve, when Monsieur Davide and I are going to attend, at the renowned Chelsea, a 10PM screening of the 1980 classic "Friday, The 13th!" That is right, darlings, the original with the one and only Betsy Palmer in her now iconic performance as Mrs. Voorhees. And it all starts with that horndog Barry and that slut Claudette!!!! Imagine, seeing this on the BIG screen in the 30th anniversary year of its premiere. How exciting can that be,darlings!!!!!!

After Halloween, comes Thanksgiving, and I am telling you, loves, the film to say then is going to be "Burlesque," surely the cheesiest looking film since "Showgirls," to which it bears more than a passing visual resemblance, but featuring an "A" list cast that includes Cher and Stanley Tucci, and that less than A-list slut, Christine Aguilera. Plus a bevy of chorus boys that all MY boys out there will want to be and dance to, let alone, Christine, but what we really want to know is how much of Stanley Tucci will be seen, and will he shake his impressive booty????? Inquiring minds want to know, girls, and I aim to find out, and report back here.

Before going on, lambs, I want to point out that there IS an antidote to the abysmal "Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson." It is "The Pee Wee Herman" show, with Mr. Paul Reubens and company doing a theatricalized version of the Playhouse, with a set to die for, brilliant lighting, the lovely Miss Yvonne and Cowboy Curtis, and a wonderful new edition named Fireman Phineas, who has a very LONG hose!!! Wouldn't we just love to see more of him AND his hose???? But, darlings, this was the most charming show in town, as Monsieur Davide and I, who were right on the aisle last night, can attest. AND the crowd went wild. Darlings, in all my years of theater going, I have never seen a standing ovation for a performer, BEFORE they do anything. Maybe in the days of Streisand and Garland, but that was before my time. The audience went crazy over Pee Wee at the start, and they kept on going crazy throughout!!!!!! And lo and behold, there was Chairy and Magic Screen!!!! I always LOVED Magic Screen!!!!!!!!!! Darlings, if you need a dose of feel good medicine--and don't we all, with what has been happening lately, then you need to go to the recently renamed Stephen Sondheim (it used to be Henry Miller) Theatre on West 43rd Street (where last season, girls, we saw Rounbabout's "Bye, Bye Birdie!") and get a dose of Pee Wee!!!!!! Such fun, darlings!!!!!!!!! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As if all this were not enough, there is a fabulous and hot movie to see called "Bear City." It is an antidote to that "Sex And The City" nonsense, as it charts the travails of a group of gay men in New York's Bear scene (REAL MEN, darlings!!!!!!!!!!) and their various escapades. Girls, you know this one will be a sellout, and, who knows, all you single guys may come away with a potential partner, or at least a hot evening trick!!!!!! I am telling you, Monsieur Davide and I are going to march over to the Quad and hold hands as we watch our boys conquer the social jungle that is their scene!!!!!!!!!!! That is, if we can squeeze in a Film Forum 50th anniversary of the Hitchcock classic "Psycho!!!!!"

See what I mean, girls!!!! The social whirl just doen's t stop!!!!! Don't you be caught on the outside looking in--polish those nails and get yourselves out to these fun filled events!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hope all your treats are tricks, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!