Darlings, "We're Sailin' Home, So, Rosie, Dear, Bring Chicken Soup Down To The Pier!!!!!!!!!!!"

Girls, you are not going to believe what I heard last night. I mean, it violates philospophy and ethics. There I was at a gathering of gay men--GAY men, mind you!--and this one guy says how he went on a date Saturday night, and the two of them went to the movies. They went to see "Funny Girl" at the Ziegfeld. Perfect; what could be a more perfect dating movie for two GAY men. But then he said that the guy he was dating had NEVER seen it???

Excuse me???? I mean, I was so horrified, I screamed! How can you be gay and NOT have seen "Funny Girl." Darlings, this was the film that made so many of us want to be Barbra, because it told us, that, like her, we could be stars, simply coming out of nowhere. It made me write the Barbra Song--to the tune of "People!"

Barbra!
We want to be Barbra!
She's the luckiest Barbra in the world.
We're children, playing Barbra's records.
And yet letting our grown up pride,
hide all the need inside.
Acting more like Barbra than Barbra.
Barbra's a very special Barbra.
She's the luckiest Barbra in the world.
With one Barbra! One very special Barbra!
A feeling deep in your soul.
Says you were half, now you're whole.
No more hunger and thirst.
But, first, be a gay man who needs Barbra!
Gay men who need Barbra,
Are the luckiest People in the world!

Yes, lambs, Barbra has made me what I am, why I am the greatest star, etc.
Do you honestly think for one moment I would date a guy who has NEVER seen "Funny Girl?" Do you think such a guy is actually GAY? Of course not!!!!!

I mean, how much world horror can we stand, girls!!!!!

And Happy Ash Wecnesday to you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!