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Saturday, July 23, 2011

So, It's Not Nice To Fool Mother Nature??????????



Honey, let me tell you, it is even not nicer to fool the Raving Queen.

As I am about to demonstrate.

Wednesday evening, the heat had gotten to both Monsieur and I,so we decided to eat out, and at a charming neighborhood place called Mappamodno, which means "map of the world," and variations on such are its decorative scheme. The cuisine is Italian; maybe not the best, but for convenience it is quite good and above pizzeria level. One of their specialties is the Mappamondo salad, which is extremely refreshing, and which is the first thing we always order--that and the Bruschutta. I am a pushover for the latter.

The trouble came with the bread. They served us some, with a bottle of olive oil, which I have no issue with. But Monsieur prefers butter, and when he asked for it, the ditz owner said they did not have any. OK, maybe they were out. Oh, and by the way this is NOT a Chiffon Margarine commercial. So, we took him at his word. However, later on, halfway through our meal, Monsieur saw this same owner deliver a bread basket, with some butter, to another table. When the owner was called on it, he just hemmed and hawed, with nary an apology.

First things, first!!!!!!!!!

This is the Raving Queen!!!!!!!!! Apologize, bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Second, why lie??????? What was the big deal over bars of butter????? Who the hell were you trying to impress by rationing it out??????? Why don't you go ask the former owner of the Paris Commune on Bank Street, how he is doing?????? He will probably refer you to my blog, where I called him out for his inexcusable bad quality of food and service, not to mention he had the temerity to give me attitude!!!!!!

Now, Mappamondo did not give us attitude, but I am telling you, if we go back there and get this butter routine, you can bet there will be attitude handed out!!!!!! Who do they think they are over there, anyway???? Sweeties, if you want to stay in business, you had just better watch yourself the next time we deign to pay a visit. Or your business will fry, honey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It must have been the evening for Attitude. Because, en route to Monsieur's before the dinner, I passed this homeless itinerant begging for money. Now, as all my girls know, if it is one thing I have, it is a maternal heart!!!!!! Room enough in it for all God's creatures.

Darlings, this creature tested my limits. He was clearly not of the neighborhood, and dressed in a Muslim cap. He was Muslim like I am Muslim. Girls, he was Muslim by way of da hood!!!!!!!! And for a homeless guy, he was doing real well--a cell phone, and a suitcase on wheels, looking like he had just come from the airport!!!!!!! And he has the nerve to beg ME for money????? Well, I gently and politely brush him off, and what does he do???? He proceeds to scream homophobic epithets after me in my wake!!!!!!!!!! I just ignored it; I don't need to traffic with idiots. And that might have been that, it it weren't for the rest!!!!!!!!!

When it was time for me to walk over to Mappamondo to meet Monsieur, I had to walk by the same area again, and there he was--bitching and screaming not only at me, but everyone. And, of course, as soon as he saw me, the anti-gay epithets followed. Well, that was it!!!!!!! I told myself, if when we are finished dining, and walk back to Monsieur's place, this cretin is still there, and acting up, I will show him what attitude REALLY is.

It almost turned into a riot. We even hand some hunky gym type guys, once they saw what was going on, surround this guy, preparing to take him on. Not only did he call both Monsieur and I "faggots," which was not appreciated, he went on to call Monsieur a "bitch!" Honey, no one calls MY Monsieur a bitch!!!!!!! Make no mistake, I told this creature, "I AM the bitch!" Then, with my eyes slanted like Scarlett, I looked him straight in the face, and said, "Get off this street, you trashy wench! Get off this land!" I think everyone was shocked; even Monsieur and the guy! If I had had a vase, I would have thrown it. He had the nerve to advance toward me, but I told him if he laid one hand on me or anyone, I would call the cops!!!!!!!!! That might have done it, because he backed off, screaming at us, as we walked away!!!!!!!!!!!!

The next day, he was GONE!!!!!!! Good riddance!!!!!!!!! At least, he heeded the Raving Queen!!!!!!! If only the staff at Mappamondo is wise enough to do the same!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And that guy is probably on their staff!!!!!!!!! Which would seal that restaurant's fate, but good!!!!!!!!!!!

Watch out, boys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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