Girls, As The Line Goes, "This Beats All Records For Running, Standing, And Jumping Gall!!!!!"

Darlings, take a look. There is no doubt that Dan Abrams is a cutie!!!! Which makes me wonder what he is up to. In my short and merry journey through the straight and gay communities, I have observed all kinds of attempts to score, get action, or, more bluntly put, get laid. But Mr. Abrams takes things to extremes. He has written a book.

A memoir would be too obvious. But there is no mistaking his intentions in the book's title--"Man Down--Proof Beyond Doubt That Women Are Better Cops, Drivers, Gamblers, Spies, World Leaders, Beer Tasters, Hedge Fund Managers, And Just About Everything Else." Oh, my God, what pretense! At 25 words, it is just two words longer than one of the longest title on record, and the longest play title ever--"Marat/Sade!!!!" And the intention behind this title is dubious at best. On one hand, it sounds like a variation on Henry Higgins' "A Hymn To Him" (or, as it is better known, "Why Can't A Woman Be More Like A Man?") from "My Fair Lady," which would make Mr. Abrams something of a misogynist. Or maybe a closet case???? I mean, it seems, from the title, and all the attributes, that he wants a woman who is, well, more like a man???? Hey, Dan, honey, if you are that conflicted, why not try the REAL thing!!!! I know some of MY girls out there who would like a crack at Dan!!!!!!

Hey, what has he got to lose? Single, still good looking in his mid-Forties (and with all your careerist projects, Dan, when do you fit in gym workouts, to keep that body taut and toned??? Maybe morning treadmill sessions, like Roberta????)

Or, one could view the book title as an obvious kiss up ploy to get women to notice him!!!! Oh, come on, Dan, can't you do better than that???? I am certainly not disputing his title's statement, but the kissing up could not be more obvious. It would be interesting to chart not only the demographics of this book's sales, as it relates to gender, it would be equally fascinating to chart Dan's romantic life in relation to this book's sales. But I am just a blogger, darlings, not a statistician!!!!!

My girls know that Dan's statistics are very nice!!!!! It just goes to show that even pretty packages can have some emotional security issues!!!!! So, I am telling you all here and now--if plagued with those, and you feel like writing a book, like Dan, fine!!!! But personally, I think following good grooming tips and possessing a socially functional personality (a REAL one, rather than faking it, like Ted Bundy!!!!) will get you further!!!!!

But isn't Dan cute, darlings!!!!! Hey, Dan, let us know how things turn out!!!!

Cheers, everyone!!!!!!!!