Girls, What A Wild And Wacky Weekend This Was!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For sheer breadth and emotional scope, darlings, this weekend ran the gamut.

It started with Monsieur and I at Gate 2 at Port Authority Bus Terminal, waiting to get a 6PM bus to Norristown, PA, to visit my sister. Now, this is a trip I have made many times in over 30+ years, but never at night. I am telling you, I felt like a serial killer on the lam!!!!! Even with the tiny lights overhead, it was so dark outside there was not enough light spill for me to read!!!!!! Which means there was nothing else to do but doze off on the ride, which, on some level helped, but which cut down on some serious reading time I was looking forward to. We did get some going back, as we returned yesterday in the daytime.



In between, on Saturday, we went on a tour of the St. Martha Manor, a Catholic senior residence run by the Philadelphia archdiocese. Darling, we were so impressed; the grounds looked like exteriors from "The Song Of Bernadette!" I was ready to move in, and so was Monsieur, who is not even Catholic. But he has seen 'Bernadette,' which counts for something. And if there, I could hold my annual Easter screening of it for the entire facility!!!!!!!

But this was not for me, this was purportedly for my father, who, at 96, claims he cannot live alone in Florida, even though he drives his own car!!!!!! He suffers from loneliness, which is understandable, but what he REALLY wants to alleviate it, is for my sister and I to move down there, where our apartments are just doors away from him.

First of all, I have no plans for Florida, and if I end up there, it will have to be in a house like "The Golden Girls." And I am Rue McClanahan!!!!!!!!! But this is not likely to happen. Nor, for that matter, is my father coming up here; for when we sounded him out about it on the phone that night, despite him having filled out the necessary paperwork, he hemmed and hawed, wrung his hands in supplication and quaked with such indecision, you would have thought he was being tortured. He definitely missed his stage calling; forget Sam Waterston doing "King Lear" at the Public this season, it should be my father!!!!!!!!!

And a visit to Target, where the stores have been cleaned out of Mesoni clothes!!!!!! What ever happened to Jaclyn Smith's fashion line???????? The cuisine was superb, and so was the coffee!!!!!!!

But I am telling you, Pennsylvania is wild! The backyard, where all sorts of creatures, from yellow jackets, to raccoons, to deer, walk right into my sister's yard!!!!!!! Sure, we have rats walking on subway platforms, and nut cases we have to ride the trains with, but you get used to that!!!!! With deer coming in to the yard, you feel like you are watching the final scene of "All That Heaven Allows!!!!!"

Which is why our return to NYC was almost like coming back to civilization, which meant settling down, with a nice meal and some SVU. But, oh, my God!!!!! I was SO emotionally exhausted that I developed a migraine. And 'SVU," I am telling you! It was supposed to be a viewer's choice marathon, but who picked these episodes???? Not one of my faves was shown, and some, like "Zebras", with Dale Stuckey, played by Noel Fisher, who looks as though he has not yet made it to puberty, I had never seen yet!!!!!! Then there was the one where Olivia goes undercover in the women's prison, and of course all the inmates look like Dyke Central, not to mention Olivia practically shows off her assets on TV, and we practically have oral sex depicted. And it remains ambiguous how far Olivia was forced to go, before rescued. Then there was that dreadful "911" episode, where she talks ad infinitum to that annoying voice named Maria, who is supposed to be a child, but was actually done by an adult actress with the most offensive Spanish accent this side of a white man impersonating Desi Arnaz as Ricky Ricardo!!!! They should have had this role done by Rita Moreno. Feel like running and dancing for joy, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!

By the time this one came on, with the migraine I had, I was ready to turn in. So, here I am today, girls, able to report on it and the week ahead which includes--
a play reading, the coming of Fall, with Prosperina going back to Hell, the anniversary of Tyler Clementi's death, and maybe a weekend trip and wedding in Buford, Georgia, a town I never heard of, but where I am sure they do not take too kindly to homosexuals, and where we may get shot at by those "Delivierance" guys!!!!!!! Heeeeeellllllllp!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, but did I tell you I saw a piece of film history???? The Colonial Theater in Phoenixville, which was used in the 1958 film classic "The Blob," looks pretty much the same, and where a "Blob Festival" is held every summer!!!!!!!!!! I have got to go!!!!!!

Sometimes, loves, Life spins merrily out of control!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!