Girls, A Word About MEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First off, darlings, they ARE pigs, but there is nothing necessarily wrong with that, because what I know about moi could get me kicked out of Miss Porter's. But for shallow superficiality, darlings, it is hard to top the male sex.

Consider the latest results of my husand hunt. I had this very nice email on you know where from this guy who, to all intents and purposes, seemed to be right, and he even indicated the possibility of that too. Then he finishes off with the following-- "The one thing we have in common wouldn't satisfy us in the bedroom. I"m really sorry."

Nice of him to say I'm sorry. To me, there are two ways to read this. The first is that it is an understated way of saying we are both bottoms (I describe myself as a sccial top but a romantic bottom) which I agree would be a deterrent, but if that is the case, then why not just come out and say that directly? Because the ambiguity of the statement suggests the old blunt routine, "You are terrific but I am not attracted to you."

First of all, bitches (and I am referring to ALL men now) you have had the rest, now try the BEST!!!!!!!!! Secnd, in my times, honey, there have been plenty of gentlemen I have known who were not exactly matinee idols, but were more skilled, sexually speaking, than their more buff contemporaries. Like that guy Dan, who was bipolar. He was cute in a sort of nebbishy way--he was no Eric Evans or Titan Media model, for sure but again, darlings, neither am I--but he was very good sexually. He knew how to satisfy me and relaxed enough to let moi take care of him. For as long as our aborted whatever lasted.

The point is, girls, that some of the hottest looking guys are duds in the sack, and vice versa--some of the duddest guys are hot as firecrackers!!!!! Which is what my emailer simply cannot grasp. He thinks a Titan Model will make things complete. Well, I have news for him--like the line in "A Chorus Line" says--"These bodies don't last forever!!!!!!!!!!" Take note of this, darlings!!!!

Someone quoted Dan Savage to me as saying that "every relationship fails, except the one that doesn't." Sweeties, at this point, I am just trying to get a coffee date, not a mind blowing experience. I have had those, by the way. Not that I intend to give up. But when you get turned down like this, it calls into question what people are really advertising for.

Are we selling product honeys? Are we working the streets/ Or do we really want a relationship. I know I want the last, darlings!!!!!!!!!!

See you at the cotillion, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!