Darlings, This Is A Salient Fact!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, gilrs, some of you may not be ready to face this truth, but it IS time to do so, in light of a recent expereince I am about to report. I am talking about how people age, and whether or not they do it well. With complete certainity, and not just because I am SO fabulous, darlings, I can tell you with certainity-- GAY men age better than STRAIGHT men.

This was brought home by someone I spotted on the Internet, namely a classmate from that horrifc high school experience named David Clewell. Now, David and I never had any issues, or much to say to each other. The only thing I can say of David is he got chosen for the National Honor Society, and I did not. Another mystery, because while he did have the grades, beyond clerking at our local bookstore, he did not do much. He was a chubby kid, who grew into a heavy adolescent, with one predominant talent--he could write poetry. In fact, this talent has proved him well; he was published while we were still in high school, and is today a prize winning poet (a narrow lterary field at best) and the Poete Laurete of the State of Missouri. Interestingly, for someone with this specialty he is straight (too bad!) and has a wife and child. Disgusting, when you consider he lives in Jonathan Franzen country--the suburban enclave of Webster Groves.

David was a round faced child, who matured into a heavy set adolescent, not handsome or particularly homey. But, darlings, you should see him now. Both of us are 55, but, lambs, I could pass for much less. People still recognize me today. If I hadn't seen the photo identified, I would never have guessed David, though I did see it in the eyes. But if there had been no identiifier, I would not have known.

What did I see? A blowsy, white haired, disheveled, beard spectacled sort, like some old thing out in the dessert for years. For a long time, David was one of the most untraceable members of our class, and with good reason. There was even a rumor he (as well as another classmate, Greg Linville) were living as street derelicts. Spotting David's photo last week at least disproved that!!!!!!!!!!!

I mean, come on!!!!! At least trim the beard, David. I am surprised your wife tolerates it, but then considering how HE looks, we have no idea how she looks. Bet she is no Roberta!!!!!!!!!!!

It just warmed the cockles of my heart to see what time has done to David. And it just proves my point--the gay men I know who have aged and are aging do it with more style and panache than these straight guys. They look better, darlings, becuause they HAVE to take care of themselves, whereas these straight boobs are stuck with their wives, who are stuck with them, who very likely look as bad as they, and would not DREAM of upsetting whatever gravy train these wives are riding!!!!! Ride this, you exploitative bitches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But, darling, I thank my lucky stars that I have not aged as bad as this. And I never well. Breeding and sophistication (the kind that can only come from being gay0 will win out in the end!!!!!!!!!!!!

Make sure we are ALL winners, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!