This post was actually meant for yesterday, darlings, but then I did not want to ruin the joy of Palm Sunday for anyone. Palm Sunday is not the reason April is cruel; it just happened to fall on April 2 this year, according to the Liturgical Calendar.
The date April 2 is forever etched in my memory, because on that date, back in 1979--44 year ago, to be exact--my mother passed away. If any event in our family's life was a life changer, this was one.
Some memories are too painful to share, but these I can share with you. It was on a weekday--a Monday, actually. It was 7:30AM, and I was just getting up--remember I was younger than, only 24!- when the telephone rang. It never rang that early in our house, so I knew this was it. Sure enough, my father called to me from downstairs, and told me the doctor had called and, well, she was gone. To make it worse, the radio, which was kept on in our house all the time till bedtime, was playing a song I hated to begin with, but even more so now--"Honey," by Bobby Goldsboro. I cannot listen to it, today.
Just like, in "Sweeney Todd," now enjoying a hot Broadway revival, when the barber sings, "If only angels could prevail, we'd be the way we were," it broke my heart, and still does, because, at the time of my mother's passing, and what followed subsequently, I wanted what was sung in that lyric so much. But I knew we could not go back.
So, Palm Sunday notwithstanding, yesterday was a sad day. Thankfully, my wonderful David found a remedy. We took a trip into downtown Brooklyn, where I purchased a pair of eyeglasses I actually liked, and then went to Barnes and Noble, where, of course, I picked up some books.. In those moments, I actually forgot what day it was.
Thanks to my wonderful David, and an encounter with Dexter the day before, the cruelty of April was staved off.
But its memory always lingers.
2 comments:
many of my family tragedies happened around this time of year.
You really don’t get over it.
It even gets Worse, in some ways, as we get older.
Victoria,
Yes, it does. I agree with you.
Post a Comment