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Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Darlings, Could My Mother Have Been Joan Crawford??????




Now, do not get excited, girls, I am not dissing on my mother, nor am I operating on delusions of being a celebrity's child. I am referring to that famous Summer of 1964, when I was the tender age of 9, and we took our famed Trip To California, doing all those touristy things one is expected to do when visiting the Golden State, where my sister was living at the time.

The trip was captured in a series of slides, which were in vogue at the time; home movie night--or slide night--was very popular inn our time, as well as an interesting record of that portion of my childhood. It is even more interesting now, as that time becomes even more distant.

One thing I remember being impressed by was Grauman's Chinese Theatre. Its Pagoda shaped facade and celebrated footprints, I knew even at such a young age. I remember my mother trying to steer me to Judy Garland, who had implanted herself there shortly after making my favorite, "The Wizard Of Oz." To this day, I am surprised I did not stand in Judy's feet; today, I am certain I would. But back then I had a special yen for monster and horror films; I was searching for someone associated with that genre, which is why I chose to stand in Charles Laughton's footprints. Having played Dr. Moreau in "The Island Of Lost Souls," and Quasimodo in the 1939 "The Hunchback Of Notre Dame," (with Maureen O'Hara) he certainly qualified.

Yes, girls, there I was standing in the footprints of one labeled to be a known homosexual, a good decade or more before it became apparent to me that I was one!!!!!!!! Did I have prescience, darlings????????? Or was I just monstrously precocious?????????????

But my mother!!!!!!!!! Oh, my God!!!!!!!!! How I wish I could find the slide of her standing in the immortal footprints of.......Joan Crawford!!!!!!!!! And this was years before we knew anything about Joan!!!!!!!!!! While we may have had our moments, my mother was no "Mommie Dearest!" There were never any wire hangers waved at me, I can tell you!!!!!!!!!! Plus, you can bet, if my mother had had a studio contract, back then, I would have been bugging her like Hell to get me one!!!!!!!!!

So, no, my mother was not Joan Crawford. But the image of Joan as mother that has emerged over the years, coupled with my mother innocently standing in her prints is just too funny and ironic for words!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Truly the foreshadowing of a future queen, Raving or otherwise!!!!!!!!!!!

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