Darlings, I Am SO Highly Sophisticated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girls, I was sophisticated from the moment I was born! By the time I was in fifth grade, I knew who Greta Garbo was, what the most exclusive eating establishments in New York City were, and that I was destined to end up there after shaking off the foundations of the small town I grew up in, and the hicks there! The life I have gone on to live is the life I was destined to lead, one far beyond their mediocre milieu. I have dined in places they could not begin to imagine, because their limitiations were such they could not imagine life beyond their psychologically gated community, or even wanted to. And now they have all gone on to live that same, boring life, whereas I, whom they spat upon and abused, claiming "I was not real," that I did not fit in, have surupassed them in social, educational and sexual experience!

Sweeties, this week I feel like I have been on a press junket! I am so exhausted I actually crashed. Cooking in my own kitchen, where I know where everything is coming from, is so therapeutic, it makes me feel like Amy Adams!!!!! And of course, you know my weekend, darlings will include a repeat viewing of "Julie and Julia!!!!!!" Meanwhile, here I am, back in my cubilce, ready to take on the public, who damn well better be ready for me, because, lambs, I will spit their stupidity right back in their faces!!!! I am telling, you, girls, sometimes it is so much fun to be an evil bitch, especially when the ones you strike out at are more evil than even you are capable of being!!!!! If everyone would just curl up with some Dickens or Trollope in the winter, or Judith Krantz in the summer, it would be a better world. "Scruples", darlings, could help reduce terrorisim!!!! And every young gay man should be REQUIIRED to read "I'll Take Manhattan," and then see Valerien Bertinelli in the made-for-TV movie!!!!!

This weekend I plan to make Audrey's Summer Squash Casserole! I will let you know how that turns out, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!