Things I Learned From Watching "The Birds" Yesterday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                    No wonder I have been "Birds"-brained these past few weeks.  This past Friday turned out to be the 36th Anniversary of Alfred Hitchcock's death, and Sundance was showing a trio of his works on Sunday--"Rear Window," "Vertigo," and "The Birds."  This might be called The Leading Lady Trilogy, because featured is each are actresses recognized as Hitchcock's Leading Ladies--Grace Kelly, Kim Novak, and, of course, 'Tippi' Hedren.

                                      'Tippi' has been my role model for decades.  And watching "The Birds" again, just a week and a half after a recent DVD viewing, I found there is so much to be learned from this film.

                                         1. If you are visiting San Francisco, the starting point is always across Union Street, with the Palm Trees.  Make sure you are dressed in a black, power designer suit, with matching heels, and walk purposefully.  Always carry a purse.

                                           2. A socialite is resourceful. Know how to, at a moment's notice, locate lovebirds, drive a car along the coast, operate an outboard motor, and work with slatted wood.

                                            3. If you have to stoop to a faux paisley nightgown at Brinkmeyer's., then do it!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            4. Bond with the kid sister. Smoke in front of her, while she knows where the brandy is.

                                             5. Encourage repressed lesbianism with your landlady.

                                              6. Confront the Oedipal mother-n-law face to face.

                                               7. Know how to run, during a bird attack, in designer high heels.

                                                8. Be prepared to slap hysterical women across the face.

                                                 9. While watching a man die from a gas explosion in front of your eyes, treat the entire event as a VOGUE photo shoot.

                                                10. When attacked by birds in an attic or bedroom, never lose your designer shoes.

                                                 I mean, these are important Life Lessons I learned, just from watching this classic yesterday. And who knows what will be gleaned, from future viewings???????????

                                                    Lastly, if anyone asks if you have ever operated an outboard motor, give the only possible answer you can--"Of course!"

                                                        I do it, all the time, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!