Darlings, I Am Going To Learn To Become A Successful Bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Or, at least, I will, girls, after I read what I found last night. Let me explain. Why toiling as a volunteer last night at the Center Library, with the fabulous Mike and Tynisha, and the goodness of my socially conscious heart, what should come in but two items that I took home. One was definitely NOT gay oriented--the last volume of the Harry Potter series, in a mint fresh hardback. Now, lambs, I own ALL the Harry Potter books!!! The other was something that should be in EVERY gay man's library, but the higher ups dictate so, so it goes to mine. It was Jerry Oppenheimer's bio "Front Row--What Lies Beneath The Chic Exterior of VOGUE's Cheif Editor, Anna Wintour!" Yes, girls, it is ANNA again; we just cannot seem to get away from here. And once I have read this tome--which should be a hoot!. honey-- you better believe I will be ready to take on the world in my furs, sunglasses and Starbucks coffee--just like ANNA. Now Oppenheimer has written about another bitch--Martha Stewart--but we don't like Martha, darlings. Unlike Anna, Martha did time in the slammer, though I hear that her cell and the girls in her Cell Block had it real good--curtains, silks, brocade, the best decor and meals, the best linene. What a good thing! I even hear Martha made those Hope Emersonian prison matrons into lipstick lesbians--you have to hand it to Martha, honey!!!!!!!!!! But Martha was a criminal felon (just like ex-Mouseketeer Darlene Gillespie, sister of Gina Gillespie, who played the child Blance in 'Baby Jane')which is one thing Anna is not, and prison is one place she has not been or ever will see. Believe me, if she is ever called up, either Grace Coddington or Andre Talley will take the rap for her!!!!!! But I am going to read, notate, and follow the Anna Plan, so I can successfully run the empire that when I am through, this blog will become, darlings, monitoring my movie and book deals, fans, non-fans, and everyone in between.

And speaking of in between, I cannot WAIT to get between some freshly laundered sheets at a certain Village pensione. Think what will become of my panties, girls!!!!!! Good thing I have so many. So many, and so fesh.

But after I finish the Anna book, they will only be off the rack designer panties, you better believe that. Meantime, have a fabulous weekend, girls!!!!! You will get a report from the front lines at the Mermaid Parade tomorrow--imagine, my 20th, and I don't look a bit older!!!!!!!!! And neithe do my panties!!!!!!!!!!

Make sure YOUR panties are freshly laundered, loves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!