Darlings, Nothing Beats VOTD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, girls, before you get all excited, just because there is an acronym does not mean this is a sexually transmitted disease. How can that be, darlings, when, after all, I am so PURE? VOTD refers to "Valley Of The Dolls," the classic 1967 film of the classic Jacqueline Sussann novel that defined an entire generation of gay men. Sweeties, when Barbara Parksins pressed her face to the pane of the train window as it sailed into New York, with Dionne Warwick screaming "Yearrrrrrrrrn for a dreaaaaaaaaam" on the soundtrack, this is who so many of us were coming to the city on our own. If only I had had that cute winter outfit and pillbox hat to go out on interviews with, like Barbara. Think what jobs I could have gotten, hon!!!!!!!!!!! This time around, however, my favorite moment had to come from Alexander Davion as Ted Casablanca, during the famous scene when Neely confronts him with the tramp in the pool. Of course, those of us in the KNOW, darlings, understand that this was based on Judy Garland coming home one day to find her director husband Vincette Minnelli, going at it with the pool boy!!!!! The sparks must have flown that night! But Alex/Ted has a line that is just priceless, loves!!!!!! Keeping a straight face, saying it with all the eloquence of Ralph Richardson reading O'Neill, he says, "That little whore makes me feel nine feet tall." Ohh, honey, come on!!!!!!!!! Nine inches would have been fine enough; otherwise he would tip over when he walks. Good thing Viagara had not been invented back then, or lots of men would have been top heavy!!!!!!!!!! But, darling, this was the perfect experience for Gay Pride, and it certainly put sparkle into what turned out to be in the Village a very anti-climactic day. I am telling you, the birthday party at Audrey's parents penthouse palazzo in New Jersey was more exciting, especially with the hors d'oeuvres, sable and white fish!!!! Girls, my taste buds are ready to go Kosher! Get me off that Catholic diet of boiled potatoes and bring me a nice brisket of beef and a compote. Of course, Monsieur David, my personal compote, was on hand to offer comfort and support, and to share the lovely VOTD experience with me. And tonight I have to meet Harvey and the girls at the Malibu. I cannot afford to crash anymore, but when you are NOT Anna, darlings, what is one to do. I do my best. And just wait till we watch Anna in "The September Issue." Bitch slap that Andre Leon Talley with my panties!!!!!!!!!!!

Make sure you don't get panty slapped, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!