Oh, My God, Girls!!!!!!!!!! NBC Is About To Desecrate The Sacredness Of Mary Martin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                  One time Musical Theater historian, Craig Zadan (author of the excellent book "Sondheim And Company"), who now fancies himself a producer, with his partner, Neil Merron, are set to desecrate another musical.  Last year, the result was the abominable Carrie Underwood "Sound Of Music," the  one that killed--yes, it did, darlings!!!--Eleanor Parker, who died, after having watched it!  Carrie was deservedly chided for not being Julie Andrews--I mean, who could be????--but, let us not forget, too, that Mary Martin originated the role of Maria Von Trapp  on the Broadway stage, and, while Julie was superior on film, Carrie was, in no way, the equal of Mary!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                   Even  more odd is that, in a way, Mary is to get shafted a second time!  Because the  musical chosen for this year's live presentation on NBC is "Peter Pan," which, to a generation of baby boomers, enjoyed some distinction as a semi-annual TV event, and was the role, like Nellie Forbush in "South Pacific," that came to be identified with Mary Martin more than Maria Von Trapp!!!!!!!!!!

                                   I demand justice for Mary, from beyond  the grave!  Casting has not been announced yet, so let's hope they learned something from "The Sound Of Music."  I could actually see Anne Hathaway doing it--at least she has the acting and singing chops--but she is too feminine, not androgynous enough!!!!!  And Cathy Rigby is just too darned old!!!!!!!  They could not afford the insurance premiums!!!!!!!!!!!

                                 I have no doubt they will muck this classic up, just like the year before!!!!!!!  As long as we are going for casting, here a few choices of my own!!!!  Ridiculous? Yes!  But it makes as much sense as anything this team will probably come up with!

                                    Peter Pan--Jodi Arias
                                    Mes. Darling--Candace De Long
                                    Tiger Lily--Aphrodite Jones
                                    Smee--Christopher Mason
                                    Mr. Darling/Capt. Hook--Lt. Joe Kenda!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
                                    Tinker Bell--Paula Zahn
                                    Nana, the Nursemaid Dog--our beloved Brooklyn dog, Cujo!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                    It would be murderously funny, darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!