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Thursday, August 8, 2013

Awwwwwwwwwwwwww! Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! With Just Two Days To Go Till The Reunion, Girls, What Am I Going To Do????????


                                                     " Scarlett:  Try it again, Mammy!
                                                     Mammy:  Twenty inches!!!!!!!!!
                                                     Scarlett:    Oh, Mammy! You simply have got to
                                                        make it eighteen-and-a-half inches!!!!!!!!!!!!
                                                     Mammy:    You done have a baby, Miss
                                                         Scarlett! And you ain't ever gonna be no
                                                      eighteen-and-half inches again.  And ain't
                                                        nothin' you can do about it!"
                                                          ---Vivien Leigh as Scarlett O'Hara, and
                                                         Hattie McDaniel as Mammy in "Gone With
                                                            The Wind" (1939)

                                     At least, darlings, Scarlett had the excuse of having had a baby!  What is mine?
Age?  Genetics? Meds?  Lack of a personal trainer?  With just two days to go till Armageddon--that is,
my 40th Year High School Reunion--how is Monsieur going to be able to lace me into anything?  And
right after this morning, when my endocrinologist so blithely tells me I should "lose a few pounds." That
is practically code, girls, for going on the Anne Hathaway/Fantine diet!!!!!!!!!!  And I am not even up for
any role!

                                      Except the toughest role is the one I am facing this Saturday--myself--when I appear at my reunion.  I have to create a breathtaking effect that will stun everyone in the room, most notably Roberta, whom I have been waiting to show up, or at least declare I am as good as--damn right!!!!!!--for lo these many years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                       Well, at least I am not one of the "Honey Boo Boo" crowd!  Even at my worst, I don't think I look THAT bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I have got to plan my entrance carefully, because you know when Roberta sweeps in there, it is going to like when the Queen of England walks in!!!!!!!!!  Heaven help me!!!!!!!!!!!  And keep me away from Betsy Trebat, so I do not blurt out every secret I know about her!!!!!!!!!

                                         If only Janice Gonnella were going to be there!  But she was a year behind me--Class Of '74--so she will not be showing up!  Now, it would be fascinating to see her--"Eleanor Rigby, picks up the rice in a church where a wedding has been, lives in a dream."  Yes, it would be fascinating to encounter Janice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                         Mammy, get my corset!!!!!!!!  Monsieur, lace me!!!!!!!!!  Sister Camille--HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                          I need all the prayers I can get!

                                           I could be the real life Sally Durant Plummer, from "Follies," here!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                                            "Why......am I here?  This is craaaaaaazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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