Tuesday, January 31, 2017
A Special Tribute To "Fatal Attraction!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Hard to believe, darlings, but the fabled thriller does turn 30, this year. Now, we know that is Anne Archer screaming, and we know why--it's that damn bunny boiling in the pot. Le lapin, dolls. Rabbit stew!!!!!!!!!!!!
One thing that will always bother me about the film is how it ended. I don't care it just was not that satisfying. Dan Gallagher (Michael Douglas) should have gotten his, but doesn't. The honor of male heterosexuality and suburban complacency had to be preserved--God forbid they should be violated.
I have always been asked what would be a satisfying ending to the film. I was never able to arrive at an answer--until I thought about things, from the rabbit's point of view!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The ending starts and finishes with the rabbit. Instead of Anne, the camera follows Alex (Glenn Close) cleverly sneaking into the house, while the family is out. She goes to the kitchen, fills the pot, slices up some veggies, throws them in, and sets it to boil.
She goes out to the yard, takes the rabbit out of its cage, carrying it into the house. She holds it over the pot. But--before she can throw it in, or slash it, the creature comes to life, a la "Night Of The Lepus," bears its fangs at her, leaps for her neck, knocks her down, and throttles her in the throat, dead.
Continue the film, as is, from there. Anne enters, is surprised, and screams. Only she is not screaming over the dead rabbit. She is screaming over the dead Alex, with the bloodied rabbit, standing over her on its hind legs, showing its teeth, and applauding with its front paws. Now the words "THE END."
What a perfect way to honor this film, as well as rabbits. So much more satisfying, too.
Don't you think so, dolls???????????????????